Open Wounds
by LoganGirl
Summary: Too much pride can kill a person. Lily has many issues in her life. She fights those who try to figure out what's wrong with her, but James is one stubborn man. Extremely AU
1. The beginning

A girl the age of eleven stepped onto platform 9 and 3/4, a knot in her stomach. Her recently acquired guardian tried not to cry and failed miserably. "Goodbye Lily," she said. "Please try to owl as often as possible. We'll see you at Christmas."  
"Like cheese you will," Lily muttered under her breath. Lily Evans's Aunt Faith tried to hug her, but Lily just shrugged her off. "I will owl the third day I get there. I mean, it's not like much will happen on the first couple days of school will there?" she said half joking. With that said, she got on the train, away from pain, terror, and hopefully, hatred.  
Lillian Leigh Evans. Rather tall for her age, standing and 5'4", but in her eyes, she just saw it as a plus when the basketball season started. With thick, dark red hair that was always pulled back into a ponytail, almond shaped jade green eyes, and an extremely athletic form. She had lived with her mother until she was six, due to circumstances beyond her control, then moved to live with her father. She moved to England due to circumstances beyond her control again. She just moved from Alaska, in America, and refused to drop her accent. She had been in sports since she was about eight. You name the sport she had probably done it, basketball, football, soccer, baseball, swim team, volleyball, gymnastics, karate, boxing, kick boxing, track, and wrestling. 'To get away from my father.' She thought, 'I hate him.' Her smooth hands gripped her trunk and with ease, put it in her compartment. The train pulled out at exactly 11:00 a.m. leaving the world she had gotten used to, but never known, behind. A boy of about her age poked his head into her compartment. He stood there, staring at her like she was an animal in a zoo. He had black hair, black eyes, and a rather skinny form." Can I help you with something?" she asked rudely. Not on purpose, she just hated it when she had to be gawked at.  
"No, just looking for someone." He left. 'Give me somewhere to go.' She thought. Oh what fun she would find at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.  
  
"Firs' years over here!" shouted a tall man. 'He's too tall.' She thought. Come on, no more 'n' fur ter a boat." He shouted above the rest of the throng of students. She followed a girl about an inch shorter than her to a boat. She, the girl, and two twin girls got into a boat. They started off. "Just wait Kobe," said a boy with jet-black messy hair. "I will get you back for what you did this summer." He had a look of mischief about him that Lily didn't like.  
"Oh yeah!" said a boy who could easily be his brother, snarled. Lily just turned and saw the most magnificent castle she had ever seen, when her boat tipped. She pushed off from the partially submerged boat and did a graceful dive into the lake they were riding on. She frog swam under water and pushed the boat with the two 'brothers' over as well. From under water she heard four splashes and two great footsteps standing and trying to figure out what happened. "Wee Wow," it sounded like. She knew he was trying to see why she hadn't shot up yet; every other student had gotten back into the boat. But she didn't. She swam until she felt she could stand. With a splashing noise, she shot up. The giant gave a great sigh of relief. She wasn't dead or in trouble.  
"'Ere you go," he said offering her his moleskin overcoat.  
"That's okay," she said, politely declining his offer. "They have a spell for that, don't they?" With that, she grabbed her wand and muttered, "Converto threaderium, and she had an instant change of clothes.  
A stern looking woman with her hair in a tight bun came out of the door they were standing in front of and said, "thank you Hagrid."  
She led them into a chamber and told them she would fetch them when the hall or some such was ready. There, she heard the real anxieties of the students. 'Nothing worse than just before a gymnastics meet.' She thought.  
The stern looking woman came back and led them through a pair of great oak doors. She began to feel nervous. She had never been so nerve racked. Not even before state champs. The woman put an old had that looked like it had seen too many heads on a three legged stool.  
The hat sang a rather hilarious song. Lily looked like she was the only one trying to not laugh though. Then the woman told the 'first years' as she had dubbed them, she would put the sorting hat on their head, it would tell them the house that would suite them the best.  
"Evans, Lily," the woman said too soon for her liking. She walked over to the stool and put the hat on.  
What she heard next scared what brave she had, out of her. "Ahh." Said the hat in her ear. "You are the one I was most anxious to sort. Best get this road on the show shall we? Hmmm. Extremely ambitious. Salazar has a rival." The hat chuckled. "But no. Hufflepuff? I find they are a bit dim for your talent. Ravenclaw perhaps? A ready mind, but would ditch studies for a good laugh. So, no. But Gryffindor? Now there is a house for you. You are extremely brave and quite stubborn. You have a real thirst to prove yourself worthy to your professors, and your piers. So, you rival the four founders. I will let you choose." She thought. The Slytherins looked like something her owl had digested. Ravenclaws reminded her of nerds. Hufflepuffs just looked bored. But the Gryffindors looked interested, like they wanted her in their house. So Gryffindor was the house she chose. She took the hat off and sat down at her house table.  
The sorting was done and everyone, the first years especially, started to eat. Lily was just in the middle of dolloping her fourth helping of mashed potatoes on her plate, when the Brown haired, brown eyed, had the same form as her, girl she followed to the boats, tapped her on the shoulder. "Hi, I don't mean to be rude or offensive but, are you a tomboy?" she asked hurriedly. She had a pretty voice and seemed shy. "The only two differences between me and a guy are that I was born with boobs, not balls, and I don't like women that way." Lily said.  
"Are you?" Lily asked.  
"I have the same answer as you. I'm Brittney Kaind." She said, holding out her hand.  
"I'm Lily Evans." Replied Lily.  
They had just gotten into an argument about the rules of soccer. "No they should use their hands in that game, other wise you trip and you could get brain damage." Said Lily.  
"But the game's been around for more than a century." Brittney retorted.  
Lily was going to say something back when she was interrupted.  
"Are you muggleborn?" a boy drawled, very snobbishly at the two of them. He had Blonde hair, cold icy gray eyes, and a rude scowl. Another first year.  
"Err, yeah," said Brittney uncertainly.  
"So tell me, are all mudbloods as stupid as you or is it a personal thing?" he snarled. The house he came from sniggered stupidly. Brittney looked rather hurt that someone would be that rude when they didn't even know them.  
"No, she's actually really smart," Lily said. "Now tell us, did you run into a brick wall before you came here, or were you just born that ugly?" The blonde had pink patches forming on his cheeks.  
Brittney finally got her voice back. "Now, do you mind, I've already lost my appetite by seeing your ugly face, I'm sure the other students wouldn't want to suffer the same fate we have." He left, tail between his legs. She was just about to go back to her now cold potatoes when she was interrupted again. "Hello, couldn't help but over hearing your argument-"  
"Bet you could of," she said.  
"I'm James Potter."  
"I'm hungry, go away." He almost looked defeated when another idea popped into his head. "But I'm stuck on you." He said slyly.  
"Then I'll peel you off," she said angrily. "Or flip you off, I don't really care." For the third time she was going to eat her dinner when another boy, came up to her. "I don't know why I even try!" she said exasperated.  
"Lily?"  
She looked up. Who she saw, she didn't expect. "Remus?"  
"Oh my."  
Lily stood up and hugged her 'brother.'  
"You know each other?" Brittney asked.  
"He is my brother." Brittney was perplexed.  
"Well, we knew each other in the U.S. and treated each other like family." Lily gave Remus a kiss on the cheek. "Family huh?" said the boy who resembled James. Remus and Lily looked at each other and said, "Family affection."  
Lily finally got a bite of her potatoes when someone poured pumpkin juice down her back. "Thirsty?" James smiled sweetly.  
"No." Brittney distracted James while lily got the potatoes from the bowl in front of her and squished it on his head. "Hungry?" Lily imitated him.  
"First years follow me." A girl named Molly called to them.  
  
After the long and tiring walk up to their dorms, Brittney and Lily chose the beds closest to the window. They were too tired to say much so they just did their nightly rituals, said good night, and fell asleep.  
They woke up to find their faces covered with scales and feathers. "POTTER!!!" Was heard all throughout the tower. Lily had the face of a dragon, complete with snarls and fire breathing. Brittney had the face of a chicken, complete with beak and clucking. Suddenly, the twins from the boat the night before popped their heads out of their hangings.  
"Need help. The boys did the same thing when we were over there this summer." they chorused. The girls had blonde hair and a thin form. The only difference between the two was that one girl had silver eyes, another had amethyst eyes. "I'm Kobe Kanaham," the amethyst eyed girl said. "I'm Logan Kanaham," The silver eyed girl said.  
"Can you please help us?" Brittney asked meekly. "Sure" they coursed. "On one condition, we become your friends and help you plan revenge."  
"You drive a hard bargain," Lily said sarcastically but still extremely excited all the same.  
The girls went down to breakfast, scale and feather free. "Can we have a group name," Logan asked.  
"Sure," Brittney said.  
"I know, how about the Crank Yankers." Kobe piped in.  
"You read my mind," Lily, Brittney and Logan said.  
The boys were shocked and open-mouthed when they saw that the girls were looking normal and had the twins as friends, but covered it up quickly. The boys walked up to the CY. "I don't believe we have been properly introduced," the neater, dark haired boy said.  
"What makes you think we care?" Brittney said. She was still sore about the chicken incident.  
"I'm Sirius Black," the neater haired boy said. He was about Brittney's height, with dark hair that fell elegantly into his black, but warm eyes, and an athlete's body.  
"I'm Remus Lupin," Lily's brother said. He was of Kobe's height, with light brown hair, soft golden eyes, and an athlete's body.  
"And I'm James Potter," Said the jet black, messy haired boy. That was how his hair was, he had warm, deep, relax full hazel eyes, and a body more built than any of his friends.  
"And we're the Marauders," they coursed. They boys were looking at them admiringly, and the girls were looking at them dreamily.  
"More like Asses incorporated," Lily snorted.(She means it good- naturedly at only Remus) The girls laughed and sat down for breakfast. The Marauders were put out. Then girls came up and started flirting with them.  
"Good God, any more inflation of their brains, and they would float to the moon, round trip!" Kobe said. The girls laughed. To Lily, life was almost perfect. 'If only I had a family,' she thought sadly. 


	2. Strip'n'Flip

I DON'T OWN ANY THING FAMILIAR TO YOU OKAY!  
The C.Y. was teased a lot. Thankfully though, they'd prank the people, namely the Marauders. There was one time that the Asses Inc. came to dinner in make-up and heels. Another, they walked around with torso and up, normal, torso and down, was the rear of a donkey. When asked a question, they would laugh like a geek, and then do the funky chicken around the professor. McCgonagall wasn't happy.  
The CY got their fare share too. They sang around in school tap dancing once. Then the night of Halloween, they were transfigured into zombies and were sent to flirt with the Slytherins.  
But soon it was Christmas. "Bye you guys. We'll miss you!" The twins screamed as the train sped off.  
"Two weeks without their masterminds. What will we do?" Brittney asked.  
"I dunno," Lily replied. So they went up to the castle. Brittney and Lily were almost inside when, when they were pelted with snow balls. "GOTCHA!" screamed the Marauders.  
"OHHHH, you're gonna get it," Lily said dangerously. The boys did. The girls white washed, pelted and even charmed the snow men that the second years were working on to chase them, tackle them and smear them in snow.  
"Okay, truce," gasped Remus. His face was pink and contorted.  
"Yeah, we give up," Sirius added.  
"Never," James said. "We can beat them, we're men, we're out numbering them, and we're better."  
Lily and Remus looked at each other. Lily smirked evilly. Remus noted that she also looked like that when she was just about to whip a persons butt at a gathering of sports players. "James, you are an idiot," He said, shaking his head though in shame.  
Lily left Brittney to finish white washing Sirius and Remus, to go after James. She shoved him on the ground. Then made what looked like the head of a snow man, and dropped it on James's head. The snow ran down his back, making him rigid. "Don't get mad, get Evans," She whispered into his ear. She stood up. "Hey Fang, you done?" asked Lily.  
"In a moment Stripes," Brittney answered. She rammed one last pile of snow into Sirius's mouth before standing up.  
"You couldn't go easy on me, your brother?" Remus asked, faking sorrow.  
"Wouldn't want to look like a wuss in front of your friends, would you?" Lily asked. "See you later Remus," Lily said.  
  
For the next week, The Marauders steered clear of the two remaining C.Y. But Lily and Brittney still liked to bring it up. They did at every chance they got.  
One day, Brittney asked, "Have you ever played strip chess?"  
A bizarre look answered her question. "Well I will teach you then. We can use the set Kobe and Logan left here. The rules are: for every major piece you lose, you take off a piece of clothing. The major pieces are the knights, rooks, bishops, the king and queen. Got it?"  
"I suppose so," Lily replied.  
"Good, now go add two or four more layers of clothing."  
That day was a weird one for Lily. Not only did she have pieces screaming at how bad she was at chess, she managed to strip to her bra and underwear in less than forty-five minutes. Brittney however, only lost her shirt. Though they both had nothing to be embarrassed about, they wouldn't stop blushing. The common room was devoid of students, seeing as how they and a few other students were the only ones to stay over the holidays. "Hurry up, will you? It's cold!" Brittney asked.  
"You're the one who-" The common room opened. And in came the Marauders. Boys will be boys, boys will stare. And that's exactly what they did.  
Lily looked up at the ceiling. "Of all the flemwads and perverts in the world, you had to give us the worst." Lily looked at Brittney, then at the Marauders. The boys of course, wouldn't quit staring at their stomachs.  
"Are you sure those six packs are real?" Sirius asked. He was befuddled. Sirius had always seen girls who were thin, not thin and fit.  
Brittney this time looked up at the ceiling. "Do you hate us this much?" She asked. Lily did something that not even she knew she could do. With one hand pinching the skin in-between her eyes and her elbow resting on her knee, she thought, 'I wish I could lift them up and throw them out the room.' Still thinking that, the boys actually lifted up off the ground. And were thrown out the portrait hole!  
"Okay, I'm done." Brittney and Lily said simultaneously. They ran up to their dorms. When Lily shut the door, they pulled on their pajamas.  
"How did you do that telekinetic?" Brittney yelled.  
"I don't know," Lily said. "All I know is that I wished they would leave the room and they did!" For The first time this year, Lily was actually afraid. Afraid that Brittney wouldn't want to be her friend any more. "Are you mad?" Lily asked, fearing the answer.  
"Mad? Do you know how much more stuff we could pull off, how much more fun we could have? And no I ain't one of those perk'n'prissis that prance around the school, worrying what other people think of them. Believe me, if I was that bad, I wouldn't even be here right now," She said quickly.  
"Thank God. We will owl the twins tomorrow about this."  
"Okay, night."  
"Night,''  
  
New Year's was very awkward. The boys wouldn't quit pestering them. Lily was trying not to abuse her power, which was very hard to do, seeing as the Asses wouldn't leave them alone. But to top it all off, the girls couldn't get within fifteen feet of the Asses, without an insult or hex being thrown. Never the less, Remus tried.  
"Well hello their chicks," Sirius said slyly.  
"Call me that again and you won't know the difference between you and a female," Lily said dangerously.  
"'Sup babe," Said James, slinging his arm around Brittney.  
"Babe is a pig, just like you," Brittney shrugged out of his grip.  
"Would you stop it?" Remus said over the bickering.  
"WHY?" they screamed back at him.  
"BECAUSE IT IS ELEVEN FIFTY-NINE AND I DON'T WANT NEW YEAR'S TO BE A TOTAL DISASTER BECAUSE YOU CANT STAND TO HOLD YOUR TONGUE," He yelled right back at them.  
"Yeah Kaind," said Sirius. So she flipped him off.  
"One big happy family ain't we. We're stripping at Christmas, and flipping each other off at New Years," Lily said sarcastically. "Makes me wonder what we'll do for Halloween next year."  
"It reminds me of Thanksgiving back when we were six don't it," Remus replied.  
"We might be the only ones standing if this keeps up,"  
"If we're lucky," They laughed and went to join the argument. 


	3. I'm tired of waiting

First Year was over. Soon Lily was back at the place she hated. Her house. Why not her home you ask. Well it is the same way with parents, Mothers and fathers create you, Moms and Dads take care of you. Houses are where you live; Homes are where you're happy.  
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY LILY," Her Aunt Faith said. She brought out a huge cake, covered in icing, sprinkles and candles.  
"Thank you," Lily replied. In truth she was proud, but disappointed that her aunt put so much time and effort into making Lily happy, but she would have been just fine with a small vanilla cake; instead of the Wedding size cake she got.  
"Girl! Blow out your candles so we can get on with our lives," Lily's Aunt Carl barked at her before sharply smacking her upside the head. He had hit her before, when she forgot to do her chores, when she had been out doing sports, but now he had been hitting her for actually being home on time. The hits had also been getting worse; he would start using things like shoes, belts, even wet towels and fists. Thankfully though he hadn't hit Lily's weak spot. That was about to change.  
There were some things she discovered earlier in the summer, some she was excited about discovering, others, she wished she hadn't.  
Lily watched Kobe eat fistful after fistful of candy and it frankly scared the crap out of her. But that's kind of off the subject. Lily was studying, trying to get some of her summer homework done on the train.  
#The Levitation spell requires a swish and flick motion of the wrist. While doing this, think hard on what you wish to levitate, and then say Wingarduim Levi-o-sa. When done properly, the object you wish to levitate will rise up into the air. To bring the object down, point your wand at a flat surface close to you then stop concentrating on the object. It should then float, drop, or fall in front of your wand. #  
That's what she did. Only she didn't have her wand in front of her. Lily didn't worry about it. She didn't want to lift something up. So she did the swish and flick of her wand, with her right index finger pointing at Logan. She muttered the spell and, voila. Logan floated up into the air, still oblivious to anything but her magazine. Kobe looked up to find her twin, staring at her quidditch magazine. "What did you do Lily?" She asked.  
"Hmm?" Lily asked. Kobe pointed up.  
"Logan, don't make any sudden movements," Brittney said.  
"I don't think being telekinetic is my only curse anymore," Lily said, half smiling, half worried. She did what the book told her to. And she brought a rigid Logan down from the ceiling of the train. "Are you okay?" Lily asked.  
"Yeah, but I got this cut on my hand from where we hit a bump, and I hit the ceiling," Logan replied.  
"Lemme see," Lily said. Logan showed her the wrist. There was a shallow, but painful looking cut there. Lily pinched the two pieces of separated skin together, to stop the bleeding. Then to all of their surprise, the cut started healing itself! "Do you think we're jinxed?" Lily asked everyone.  
"No, I just think you're very, very, lucky," Kobe replied. "Okay, you're telekinetic, capable of wand less magic, and you have healing powers, is there anything else you can do?" Kobe asked.  
"I dunno, but I will let you know when I find out. I want to be able to have like untamed athletic ability though, wouldn't that be cool?" Little did she know that she did. That was one reason why she was always able to beat the best people on other sports teams.  
Back to the present. Lily had always taken the beatings for her sister. She didn't know why, it was probably one of her sister instincts. Well, this time, her uncle had probably gotten really peeved at Petunia for moving out earlier that same day, and well, he decided to take out his anger on Lily.  
"Damn it, stand up," he snapped at Lily. Lily had stood up. She was confused; she had already blown out her candles.  
"Wh-," she started to say, when her uncle's fist, met her stomach, full force. She got the wind knocked out of her. She kneeled over and felt herself gasping for breath. That was her weak spot. For some reason, her stomach was always very sensitive. She felt the vibrations of two people arguing on the floor, and heard her aunt pleading with her uncle.  
"Don't hit her," She said, tears flowing down her face. "What did she do?"  
"She was being disobedient," He spat at her.  
"But she was just-," He smacked her across the face. She reeled back.  
"What were you going to say," he whispered dangerously.  
"Nothing dear, nothing," She replied.  
"Good. Now get rid of this garbage, we have better things to do with our time," He snarled before he left into the parlor. Lily had got her wind back somewhat.  
"WHATS WRONG WITH YOU?" Lily yelled at her aunt.  
"He's just telling it like it is," She retorted.  
"I DIDN'T KNOW PEOPLE MADE A LANGUAGE OUT OF FIST FIGHTING,"  
"I'm surprised that you're getting mad at me, when you're the one who's only telling half the problem Lily,"  
"THAT'S PROBABLY BECAUSE THERE IS ONLY HALF WORTH TELLING,"  
"I'm just trying to help,-"  
"SO STAND UP TO PEOPLE, DON'T LET THEM BEAT YOU DOWN,"  
Her Aunt Faith sighed angrily. "You know, what little information you have told me about your life, you have had great advice, now here is some of mine. Follow your advice for once," she said before storming out of the kitchen. Lily stormed out of the house, and sat on the bench in front of her lawn.  
  
Thirteen year old Lily sat in that exact same spot, remembering that day. She loved her bench. She had thought a lot about what her aunt said, and finally decided to take her up on her advice. She smiled, not a smirk or a grimace, but an I'm happy smile. She wasn't going to take it any more. Lily hadn't cried once in her life, she just tried not to make her injuries a big deal, and she wasn't going to start now. But her uncle, who was like the spawn of Satan, couldn't even compare to what she went through with her father. And her mother, oh no. don't even get her started on that subject.  
Lily was brought out of her revere, when she heard her name being screamed over and over again by her guardians. She had learned to just tune them out but this time, it seemed serious. Then she heard her uncle say 'can't afford it,' and decided to check it out.  
She opened up the front door to find her guardians yelling back and forth. 'Can't have been arguing long, otherwise Aunt Faith would be bruised beyond belief.' She thought.  
"Lily, you're not going to that freak school," her uncle said.  
"Why?" She asked sharply.  
"We can't afford it," he replied hotly.  
"You are some of the richest people in this god forsaken country, and you're telling me you can't afford it," she asked,  
"Watch your mouth b*&%^," he growled.  
"I'd like to see you try and make me."  
He walked over to her, his hand raised. She threaded her two arms around his raised hand and pulled downwards. There was a resounding crack and his arm fell limp. He gasped. Then he raised his purpled head.  
"Go pack some clothes, NOW," Lily yelled at her aunt. She followed her orders like a house-elf. Lily looked back down at her uncle and gave him an upper cut to the chin. He fell to the floor with a loud thump.  
  
"Hey Tom, do you have a room," Lily gasped at the Leaky cauldron inn bartender.  
"Yes I do, room 13, please follow me," he smiled his toothless smile before leading them up to their room. "'Ere's your keys, misses," he said before giving them both a key. Two hours later, they were sitting in front of the window, watching the rain fall in sheets.  
Out of the silence, Lily asked "When am I going to learn?"  
"Why?" her aunt asked.  
"Because I'm tired of hating," she said.  
"When will you feel the burn?"  
"Why?"  
"Because I'm tired of waiting," she said.  
"We need to get out of there for good,"  
"Where will we live?"  
"It's time you learn the ways of the magical," Lily said with a smile.  
"Can we start trying to be friends?" Aunt Faith asked.  
"Nothing would make me happier," Lily replied. 


	4. Movin' in

They had found a magic real estate agent in London. The all magic neighborhood was called Portries Pie hole.  
"This is by far one of the most elegant and well built houses in all of magical England," The agent said. She actually wanted them to call her by her first name, Agnes. Her last name was Snapple.  
"How much will it be?" Aunt Faith asked her.  
"It's actually one of our cheapest houses. 1500 galleons," She replied. "But since no one wants the muggle style, we might be able to lower it a couple price ranges."  
"You're sure this is a muggle style house, inside and out," Lily asked.  
"As sure as my name is Agnes Snapple," Agnes replied cheerfully. Lily liked her. She seemed like the true optimist, always finding the good in things.  
After some conferencing between Lily and her aunt, they walked up to Agnes. "We'll take it," they said.  
"Oh that's wonderful. Now who is the magical one here?" Aunt Faith pointed at Lily. "Okay, here is my address, floo if you have any problems at all. Oh thank you so much, I promise you won't be disappointed. I can't wait to tell Mr. Wessler about this, he always says I should stick with what the people want. But no, there is always one person who wants something different, and I am glad it's you," She said to the both of them.  
''Thank you so much Agnes, for finding such a beautiful house in such a wonderful neighborhood," Aunt Faith told her.  
"My pleasure," Agnes replied.  
  
They walked up to Lily's uncle's house. Aunt Faith knocked. He opened the door, a whiskey bottle in his hand and chocolate all over his face. "Get in here," he said, trying to grab their arms.  
"How about no," Aunt Faith told them with an icy edge to her tone that Lily had never heard before. She handed him a piece of paper before walking in with Lily by her side.  
"What the hell is this?" He barked at the two of them.  
"Well, its paper, the ink on there spells words, the words say, you're getting a divorce," Lily barked right back at him.  
"Like hell you are," he said.  
"If you even touch her or me, I call the police and send your ass off to jail," Aunt Faith said.  
"In fact, I think you have even got a jump on the bandwagon Aunt Faith," Lily told her aunt.  
Inside, came five police officers came in and threw the cuffs on Carl.  
"Best get this road on the show, shall we?'' Lily asked.  
  
"Okay, we have packed and un-packed everything in these boxes, now how am I supposed to make the bills or do the shopping?" Aunt Faith asked.  
"Simple, you transfer half your account into Gringotts, and keep half in London National Bank," Lily replied.  
"Well, let's do our shopping and make this place feel more like home, How about it Lily?" asked Aunt Faith.  
"I would really like that,"  
They had flooed to Diagon Alley. They were now checking out all the home stores.  
"May I help you misses?" a girl named Xenia asked.  
"Yes, actually. Where do you keep your bathroom and bedroom ensembles?" Aunt Faith Asked.  
She led them down a hall, into a room that was covered with everything you could possibly want for your b-rooms. Aunt faith had chosen soft, fluffy, warm, deep lavender bed blankets, soft white paint for her walls, fluffy, warm pale purple towels, and soft purple bathroom mats.  
Lily had chosen three colors for her room. A mint green, soft, warm, sinkable, thick, huge comforter, complete with mattress and other sheets, pale blue wall paint, red warm, fluffy towels, and golden bathroom mats.  
Will that be all misses? The sales lady asked.  
No we just moved in and we're looking for stuff for our guest bedrooms, living room, dining room, kitchen and reck room.  
"Oh why didn't you say so, we could have helped you more," she said  
  
Fifteen minutes later, they were looking at stuff for their guest bedrooms and bathrooms.  
"Do you have a certain theme?" Dora asked.  
"I will let lily pick out two, then I will pick out two," Aunt Faith said.  
"Okay miss," Dora said  
"The first one, I want to be quidditch themed, so get sky blue paint, grassy green bed things, and quidditch stuff, like a quaffle, non moving bludgers and snitch. The second one I want to be water themed, so Hawaii ocean blue bed things and white walls," Lily told Dora.  
"Very well. Miss Evans?" Dora asked.  
"So, I want the last two rooms to be Green bed things and light purple walls, the last, I want to be, red bed things and silver walls,"  
"Here you go miss," Dora handed shopping bag after shopping bag of home items to the two of them.  
After two days, they finally finished with their house. The kitchen felt like, like a grandma about to make a huge dinner for the family. The dining room felt like a place to just relax, the living room felt homey, they just needed a Television. As for the reck room, well, they had stuff like punching bags, boxing gloves, and a whole bunch of other stuff.  
"Well does this feel homey?" Lily asked.  
"It feels like, a Christmas gathering, you know," Aunt Faith said.  
It was already Mid-August. Just a few more weeks before Lily went to school. From the beginning of July, to now, they had become like a Mom and Daughter, and friends beyond recognition. Instead of Lily being ashamed that she didn't have a real family, she showed her Aunt Faith off to the world.  
Aunt Faith showed Lily off too many of her new magical friends. In fact, She got tipsy one night, and started bragging to Dumbledore, who had been there as a birthday gift, well, she started telling Dumbledore of all Lily's powers. Dumbledore stroked his chin thoughtfully. 'I must have to do some research over the course of the summer, and then I shall have a talk with Lily when school starts,' he thought.  
Lily would have some very interesting, fun and painful years ahead of her. Dumbledore only wished she was ready for the challenges she would have to face, while growing up, evolving from a child, into a true adult. He was thankful that she didn't show off to everyone. It would be harder for Voldemort to detect her. 


	5. scanning the new territory

"Bye Aunt Faith," Lily said to her aunt.  
  
"I will see you in the summer," Aunt Faith said. She gave Lily a hug and waved to her as Lily ran through the barrier.  
  
"OMPH," Lily said as a mass of blonde hair came running at her.  
  
"Lily," Kobe and Logan squealed.  
  
"Sparky, Talons, I can't breathe," Lily gasped. It was true, her face was starting to turn purple and her eyes started to water.  
  
"Kobe, Logan, its time to let go, its time to let go," Brittney cooed.  
  
"Well we haven't even seen her all summer," Logan argued.  
  
"We'll catch up on the train, if we make it. Crap, its 10:58."  
  
They found a compartment that was empty in the back of the train.  
  
"Okay, what did you guys do this summer," Lily asked.  
  
Kobe and I went to Russia. There was absolutely no toilet paper, my God, it was horrible.  
  
"I went to Germany, my grandma taught me a new swear word," Brittney said.  
  
"What is it," Lily asked.  
  
"Oxen schniza. It means bull shit,"  
  
"I hope Cardel don't know German, because when he takes away points for breathing wrong like he did in third year, I am going to call him that the whole semester," Kobe said.  
  
"Hello ladies," a deep voice said.  
  
Lily looked up. She was met with James's warm, deep, relax full brown eyes. She looked down. His once thin, but athletic form had filled out over the summer. He had become muscular, but not bulky. She saw his shirt, all fancy and stylish. His hair had also grown messier  
  
Then she looked at Remus and Sirius. They both had filled out over the summer, so they weren't the thin, weak looking guys any more.  
  
"My My, you two are looking as beautiful as ever," Sirius said smoothly.  
  
His voice had dropped a lot since she heard him at the end of fourth year.  
  
"Hey Lily, girls," Remus said. His voice had dropped a lot too.  
  
"Good god," Logan breathed.  
  
"Sparky, shut up while you're still ahead," Brittney said. (Stripes- Lily, Fang-Brittney, Sparky-Logan, Kobe-talons.)  
  
Though the C.Y. had had a good summer as well; they had all developed in a good way.  
  
Kobe and Logan were both very tomboyis, but they were more willing to use make-up than Lily or Brittney.  
  
The twins had become curvier in more wantable places. But they still had a lot of muscle, including six packs.  
  
Brittney and Lily had gotten even more toned over the summer, due to sports. They had rock hard bodies, and the muscles in their stomach, arms, and legs had shown up more defined. They had also gotten curvy in wantable areas.  
  
Lily's hair had grown out, so when let down, it reached the bottom of her shoulder blades.  
  
Kobe's hair had become shiner, and reached the middle of her back.  
  
Logan's hair had actually grown darker. It looked like an extremely light brown color.  
  
Brittney's hair had gotten blonde and red streaks, and had reached the middle of her shoulder blades.  
  
Lily looked from the marauders fancy shmancy clothes, to her old, worn swim team hoodie, and ripped baggy pants.  
  
"Is there something we can help you with?" Lily snarled out of embarresment. The marauders had noticed them staring. Lily's cheeks were now the color of the rising sun.  
  
"Just seeing if there was any new flesh we haven't seen. It seems you have been holding out on us," James said.  
  
"Well if that's all, kindly vacate our presence," Kobe said  
  
"Excuse me?" Sirius asked  
  
"Get," Kobe said.  
  
"Out," Brittney said.  
  
Fucking," Lily said.  
  
"Pigs," Logan said.  
  
"Well sorry," Remus huffed.  
  
Lily gave Remus a hug because she felt bad.  
  
The marauders left.  
  
"I see, I want," Brittney breathed.  
  
"I won't be able to see them again with out getting a different image than usual," Kobe said.  
  
"How so?" Lily asked  
  
"Instead of seeing them crying for their moms, I see them in swim suite Jammers, posing," Kobe said. In truth she did see that, and it scared the crap out of her.  
  
"Let's go to the Room of Adventures after we get to school," Logan said.  
  
"Good idea. I need to pretend that punching bag is Potter," Lily said.  
  
I got dibs on the soccer field," Brittney said.  
  
The Room of Adventures would soon hold the marauders. The invisibility cloak and map would come in much handy. 


	6. The Room of Adventures Pt 1

"Welcome to the new students, Welcome back, to the old. I have but a few announcements to make; however, this is not the time," Professor Dumbledore said.  
"THANK GOD," Sirius said. The second that the food had appeared, he stuffed His plate with everything within reach. Then he started eating. It made a blender look almost, dull. Seeing him eat was the worst thing, he would chew his food with his mouth open, talk with his mouth full of food, and he would steal your food off your plate when you aren't looking.  
Down the table, the C.Y. weren't having much better luck. Brittney inhaled food, but at least she didn't act like Sirius. "Do you even taste that food?" Logan asked.  
"Es, these steamed carrots are 'ood," Brittney said.  
"Hate to break it to you, but you're eating chicken," Lily said frankly.  
Brittney swallowed. "I knew that," she said sheepishly.  
Kobe rolled her eyes. "And I'm a man in disguise,"  
"Well, that wouldn't be far from the truth, OW," Brittney rubbed her eye. "You didn't have to throw that roll you know."  
  
A week later, the usual tricks resumed, with the Crank Yankers teeing off first. During transfiguration, the marauders had decided it would be funny to have the girls speak a language of their own.  
  
"Miss Evans, are you paying attention," Professor McCgonagall said sharply to Lily, who had been flicking spit wads at the Slytherins.  
  
"Why of course Professor, why wouldn't I?" Lily asked innocently.  
  
"So in your quest of engineering how to swap saliva and trade note paper simultaneously, you managed to hear the question?" She said while the class sniggered.  
  
"At least I have someone to swap saliva with," Lily muttered under her breath. This time only the C.Y. and Remus laughed.  
  
"Pardon?" Professor McCgonagall asked.  
  
"Could you repeat the question?" Lily asked.  
  
"I asked the spell you would use to transform animals, into water goblets," Professor McCgonagall said.  
  
Lily started to say the answer, when she spoke in gibberish. (Think Evan Baxter from Bruce Almighty.)  
  
"I have had it with your so called, comedy. You will serve detention with your good  
  
Friend, Mr. Potter. Stay after class so we can arrange it."  
  
"I didn't do anything," James cried.  
  
"Let's just say, you're not as clever or sneaky as you may think," Professor McCgonagall said smugly.  
  
"Payback?" Brittney said once the professor's back was turned.  
  
"Oh yeah. Watch this," Lily said.  
  
"Copious tellingus," Lily muttered.  
  
All of a sudden, James started whispering loudly. "Man. McCgonagall has a nice ass, wouldn't you just like to give it a spank every once in a while. I mean, damn. I wouldn't mind taking her up to the tower for a snog, wouldn't you?'' he asked Sirius, who was just staring, dumbfounded.  
  
All the while, McCgonagall was right in front of him, with her hand on the chalk board.  
  
"Finite," Lily muttered. James stopped speaking and looked around. The whole class room, which had been deathly silent, now started to erupt in whispers and laughing.  
  
None louder than the C.Y. "Mr. Potter," McCgonagall said crisply. "Kindly leave your fantasy life alone until after class,"  
  
She was smiling, that was always a good sign.  
  
He gulped. His cheeks were redder than the rising sun." Yes professor," he said. Sirius and Remus just regarded him with increasing amounts of confusion.  
  
"Them," He said, pointing at the C.Y., looks of realization dawned across their faces.  
  
A few weeks before Thanksgiving, The C.Y. decided to go the Room of Adventures.  
  
"Come on, let's go to the RoA." Logan said  
  
"What about the stuff," Kobe asked  
  
They got all the stuff there," Brittney said.  
  
"Screw it let's go," Lily commanded.  
  
They were almost out the door, when.  
  
"Whacha doin" Remus asked.  
  
"Ignoring you," Logan said.  
  
"Wherever it is, can we come too?" Sirius asked.  
  
"How about no," Brittney rolled her eyes as she said this.  
  
They managed to get away from the marauders, for now.  
  
They soon reached the portrait of the Ballycastle Bats. "Password?" The portrait said monotonously.  
  
"Porskoff," Logan said impatiently.  
  
They crawled through and ended up in a locker room. Walking down a hall to the left, they were met with a large, windowless cavern. In the center of the floor, the y found a pool.  
  
"Converto threaderium," They muttered. They soon had on full piece swim suites.  
  
"Race you in a 400 IM," Lily said with a smirk on her face.  
  
The marauders had followed them and just made it to the deck, when they heard them mutter the spell.  
  
They muttered the same spell, but still stayed under the invisibility cloak.  
  
They saw the girls get up onto the diving blocks, heard them scream 1.2.3.GO!  
  
They dived into the pool. The race the boys saw between the girls was intense. They may have been great friends, but when it came to sports, they were in to win. The marauders got onto the blocks.  
  
Lily finished first, Brittney second, Logan third, Kobe a second behind Logan.  
  
Lily's arms slammed into the wall with a splash. Right after, Sirius, James and Remus jumped in, shouting, "Cannon Ball."  
  
"WHAT THE HELL!" Logan screamed.  
  
Lily pulled herself out of the water with her arms. She started to walk towards the locker room, but not without something forming in her mind.  
  
"Where are you going?" Remus asked.  
  
"Getting out," she replied simply. The three remaining girls did a distraction while Lily got silently into the pool. She conjured up three water balls. Then threw them at the boys. They hit with a thud.  
  
"OW!" Sirius said.  
  
That started a water fight that ended up with more water sloshing up onto the deck than actually remained in the pool.  
  
Lily started splashing Sirius, when, James charmed an ice cold water ball to hit her on the top of the head.  
  
She gasped. Then she pushed him under the water. When he came up, he was met with 10 ice cold water balls.  
  
Lily raised an eyebrow. Then she smirked.  
  
They finally called a truce.  
  
They trudged back to the locker room. They turned on the water. Sirius wouldn't stop bugging Brittney.  
  
"Hey gorgeous, would you like some help with your suite?" He asked slyly.  
  
"Potter needs more help than I do," She said casually.  
  
"Yeah he-Hey," he said.  
  
"Oh well," Brittney said.  
  
WILL FINISH OFF CHAPTER LATER. PLEASE REVIEW, I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK WOULD MAKE THE STORY BETTER. 


	7. The room of adventures pt 2

Lily watched the whole scene with the water pounding on her back; it was really quite amusing, Sirius staring at Brittney everywhere, Remus and Logan starting to get along, and James and Kobe getting into a heated argument about quidditch.  
"Do you guys want a tour of the rest of the Room of adventures?" Lily asked.  
"Where do you go? All I see is the room we're in and the pool in the cavern over there," Sirius asked.  
You see the wall next to Lupin?" Kobe asked. The marauders nodded. "You run and slide. If you drop and slide at the right time, there is a passage that leads down into the lower part of the room."  
"But if you slide too soon or too late, you get a very big knot on you head," Lily said.  
"I have an idea," Logan said.  
"I'm surprised that your brain functions at all," Remus said, faking shock  
"If I'm stupid, then I'm Merlin to you," Logan snapped.  
"Anyway, why not go with one of the asses, they know about the room, why not give them the full enchilada," Logan said.  
"Fine but I go with Remsters," Lily said, exaggerating the 'Remsters' part.  
"Grab my wrist," Lily said. Remus obeyed. "Run." He ran with her. "SLIDE!" They landed on their left thighs and hips. Sure enough, A hole opened up enough for three people to slide down in.  
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Remus screamed.  
"I got next. Anything Moony screams at has to be entertaining," Lily heard James yell. They gathered speed. Soon the walls next to them were nothing but blurs. The end of the slide they were on curved up at the end. They went flying through the air and landed on a trampoline. Remus would bounce and yell, bounce and yell, for about a minute. Then his cries became muffled as Sirius and Logan landed on him.  
"Oomph," Remus said into the trampoline. Lily and Sirius started laughing uncontrollably because Logan sat on his back, just to spite him for putting whip cream on the toilet seat while she was PMSing earlier that week, and Sirius wouldn't move his butt from Remus's neck.  
When asked, he would simply reply, "I have the dog's motto, because I can,"  
"Black, Lupin's face is starting to turn purple," Brittney told him.  
"His face turns that color when he's snogging too," Sirius said.  
"Why were you watching?" Lily asked.  
"My girlfriend decided my neck was more, how shall I put it, flavorful," He replied. That smirk was one that indicated it was very pleasurable  
"That's nasty," James said. "You wouldn't like it when you're getting into that mode with your snog partner and have the Daily Prophet there watching you, would you?"  
"If I got paid yeah," Sirius said nochanltly.  
''No comment," Kobe said  
"We ain't even done with the tour," James said impatiently.  
"Thank you, we need a change of topic," Remus wheezed.  
They bounced along the gym sized trampoline, off to an old wooden door. It creaked when James opened it. "Kinda cold idn't it?" Sirius asked.  
  
"Don't you know a spell to change your clothes?" Lily asked.  
"You're right. Converto threaderium," he said. He had on an old worn Applebee Arrows shirt and sweats.  
"Nice fashion choice," Logan muttered.  
"I do try," Sirius said sarcastically.  
"Let's move on shall we," Lily said loudly.  
They found themselves in a completely matted room. "Wrestling. The sport for spandex lovers," Brittney said.  
"I was in wrestling," Lily said.  
"Why?" Kobe asked.  
"It was the only thing I hadn't done, and I had nothing to do until volleyball started.  
"I played against you, remember? It was the Edinburgh lions against the London wolves. That spike was amazing,"  
"That was you!" Lily asked incredulously.  
"You and I were captains,"  
"I don't have a good memory do I?" Lily asked.  
"Along with other things," James said, wincing as Lily stepped on his foot.  
  
They showed them where the equipment and uniforms were. That place was also used for boxing, kick boxing, karate and gymnastics.  
"Come on, we will show you the outside/inside track, soccer, and football field," Brittney said excitedly. There was a door that led field on the right side of the room. The field was almost too authentic to be real. The grass was the color of Lily's eyes, the yarldlines were ghostly white, and the goalposts looked brand new.  
"I love this place more than any other," Brittney said. She breathed in the air and looked around with a certain amount of pride. The marauders looked around in awe. But Sirius was staring at Brittney, as though seeing her in a whole new light. He completely ignored the field after Brittney breathed deeply. His mouth was slightly open and his eyes were glazed over.  
  
"Padfoot? You'll die of dehydration at the rate you're drooling," James whispered.  
"What prongs?" He asked.  
"Never mind," James answered.  
The two groups walked through a door to the left of the field. There was every piece of medieval weaponry, short of a cannon and catapult, there. Swords, Maces, and spears hung from the walls, glittering.  
"Why do you like this place?" Remus asked.  
"Because if you think about it, you need to act very graceful and stay light on your feet. If not, either your weapon of choice kills you, or your opponent's does," Kobe said.  
"I find it to be a waste of time. That's why I like the first room off of the trampoline room more than any other. You teach you're body to discipline itself, and you turn your self either into a weapon of hurt, or help," Lily said.  
"With the field, you learn teamwork, and strategy, you learn to train different parts of your body to do different things." Brittney said.  
"Do you have a favorite room? From what you've seen I mean," Logan asked.  
"I like either the pool or the trampoline," Sirius said.  
"I'm partial to the field," Remus said.  
"I'll see all of my options before I make a decision," James replied  
"Our last stop before we take another secret way out of here," Kobe said.  
The C.Y. led the marauders to a magnificent basketball court. The floor was shiny, the hoops were put up to perfection, and it had windows that displayed the weather you wanted it too. "This is my favorite room," Logan said.  
"Why?" James inquired.  
"Basketball is like chasing in quidditch, I'll explain the rules of basketball later," She said. "On the basketball court, your team moves as a single body. When you win, you feel like the world is applauding with the audience in the actual gym."  
THUD!  
"That sounded like the portrait slamming," Brittney said.  
"Wh-,"  
"Shhhhh," Lily hushed them.  
"Find them my sweet. No one is going to get away from me. You'd think that the marauders would learn not to leave that map lying around wouldn't you Mrs. Norris,"  
"You what!" Kobe hissed.  
"Well we thought that if we got locked in this room we would leave the map to let the rest of the population know where we were," Sirius said sheepishly.  
Lily mad a gesture that strongly resembled a strangling.  
"Come on. There is another way out of here," Lily said.  
THUD! "That was the first door shutting," Brittney whispered. They ran through the medieval room. There was a door on the right that Lily pointed at. Brittney, Sirius, Remus, Logan and Kobe all ran through. Then Lily went; James would have gone; however, he tripped.  
THUD! There went the second door. They were two doors away from being caught. Lily pinched the skin between her eyes and thought hard about bringing the invisibility cloak. There was a whizzing sound and the cloak landed on the top of James.  
She ran to help him up.  
THUD. There was the third door. One door from disaster. Lily grabbed him under the arms and steered him through the door the first five went through, with him in the front. Just as they ran through the door, the final door where they were just in slammed open.  
Lily ran down the hallway, there were suits of armor, and weapons hanging from the walls. The hallway opened up sharply. If looked at from an aerial view, it would have seemed like a meat cleaver. Lily shoved James into the first corner. She backed up against him. James could suddenly feel every groove of her figure, the expanding of her chest, and the beat of her heart. He could smell the apple scent of her hair. For a moment, he forgot about Filch and was about to say thank you, when she raised her left arm, her hand clasped around his mouth, silencing all sound he attempted to make.  
Lily was having a rather light headed feeling. She felt his chest rise and fall quickly, she felt the fast beating of his heart, how well she conformed to his body, and his breath on her neck. She through the cloak around them just in time, for not a second sooner, Filch and Mrs. Norris ran through the hall. Lily stopped breathing, James noticed, when Mrs. Norris turned her lamp like eyes on them. Her eyes shut tightly and she prayed silently that a sound would come from far away from where they were at. Her prayer was answered. 'I have to remember to thank Padfoot if we get out of this alive. If I died with Evans like this though, I wouldn't feel too bad. Whoa! Where did that come from?' James thought. Filch and Mrs. Norris ran off to the source of the noise. Normally they would have tried to get caught, but with the new caretaker, they rather find out how he acted around the students. The two waited for about three minutes before throwing the cloak off of them. "Phew," Lily said. "Come on; let's go before the terrifying two decide to come back."  
"What about the map?" James inquired.  
"What do you want? To get out of here alive, or get caught. Either way we still ain't getting the map back."  
"We didn't wipe it clean. He will know where we are," James retorted.  
  
She concentrated on the map. In the distance, she heard "Mischief managed," and said it. The map was wiped clean.  
"We're fine, now," she said. "Let's go."  
"How did you do that?" James asked.  
"I'll tell you later," she said shortly.  
They reached a suit of armor that belonged to King Arthur. Lily grabbed his shirt sleeve and pulled him through a wall.  
"When did you find out about this?" James asked.  
"Third year. We were bored and just walking through the castle. We walked past the portrait right as Logan said 'Porskoff,' and voila. Now come on." Lily ordered. There was a trap door that she pushed him up through. They toppled over on the east wing of the castle. James threw the cloak over the two of them and they walked to Gryffindor tower.  
"Password?" the fat lady inquired.  
"Ferula," James said hurriedly.  
They walked into the common room to find all the seats in front of the fire taken by the five friends and foes.  
"Thanks for waiting," Lily said sarcastically.  
"As long as you're happy," Brittney said absent mindedly. "Ouch. What is it with everyone hitting me this year?" She fake whined.  
"You want every single reason?" Sirius asked innocently.  
"Probably not," Brittney replied smiling.  
"I'm bushed," Kobe said.  
"Ditto," Lily added. The four exhausted girls trudged up to bed.  
"Ready for a prank?" Remus asked excitedly.  
"What do you have in mind?" Sirius inquired.  
"How about we cover them with green slime that says 'I love make-up.' They would rather be snogged by Slytherins than say that," James said.  
"You are such an evil genius," Sirius said. "I love you." (Brotherly love)  
They managed to get up the stairs and walked in the girls dorm to the floor covered in Coral Wellington's, the school whore, clothes( the bed arrangement goes-Brittney, Lily, Logan, Kobe, starting with Brittney at the window). They walked over to Brittney's bed. She lay there, her right foot and arm hanging off the side of the bed, and her snoring, not loud, but not soft either. The marauders sniggered. They headed over to Kobe's bed. The covers were on the opposite side of where she was sleeping. She was actually singing. She started mixing the songs up. It was very hard not to just burst out laughing for the guys.  
They found Logan's bed. She was talking in her sleep. She would mutter things occasionally, like "Stop it that tickles. My god, your arm is so strong, and, you are very handsome." Remus had to stuff his fist in his mouth to muffle the sound of his laughter. Last, they walked over to Lily's bed. They pulled back the curtains. Lily lay there, breathing silently, her hand gripped her duvet. She was curled up on her left side into a little ball. It made James heart stop. When she was asleep, she looked almost, normal. 'It would be so nice to just curl up with her. Good grief. I need a new girlfriend.' He thought.  
Lily stirred. She raised her head. "Good god, Fang," She grabbed a pillow from the middle of her back and threw it at Brittney's head.  
"Ouch! Must you do that?" Brittney said groggily. 'I wonder what it would be like to wake up next to her. I am going psycho.' Sirius thought wildly.  
"You sound like a wounded hippo," Lily said.  
"If I didn't have a cold, I wouldn't be snoring," The half asleep Brittney said.  
"By the way, Black is staring at you," Lily acknowledged.  
  
"Screw off Black," Brittney said.  
"Fine. By the way, nice pajamas," Sirius said, smirking.  
"At least I have some," Brittney shot back.  
"Wait. How did you know we-I was here?" He inquired  
"You breath louder than she snores," Lily said.  
"If you want to argue like a married couple, do that in the common room," Lily said rudely.  
"That's gross," Sirius said.  
"Shut up and leave, maybe we'll stop talking like that," Logan said, finally stirring. "If you want to do someone, there is Wellington over there," Lily said bluntly. She was not happy about getting up at 2:30 in the morning.  
"Great idea," James said.  
"Forayer is in the bed next to her. Take her to your bed if you want a little TLC," Logan said.  
It was going to be a weird year. For both groups. Pain, terror and fear would roll themselves into one person. She would take all the world would throw at her, and she would try her hardest to throw it back twice as hard. Lily Evans was certainly not normal, even by magical standards. That would prove to be her greatest strength, and her greatest weakness. 


	8. Mobscenes and quidditch

The next day at breakfast, The Slytherins got a little surprise at their table.  
  
"This is going to be so much fun," Sirius said. He always acted like a five year old who was about to get his birthday presents.  
  
DURING THAT NIGHT... (I am going to add stuff from the present time and I might unintentionally add stuff from other Fan Fics, so I apologize for any discomfort or offense this may cause)  
  
"Come on you dunderheads," Sirius hissed at the six of them. It was way too cramped under the cloak and he wanted to get out as soon as possible under that cloak. After showing them the room of adventures, they finally decided to call a truce and try to become less harmful towards each other.  
  
Anyway, they were headed towards the Slytherin's common room. Down past the potions master's sleeping quarters, they heard a snore and a moan coming from in there. "Stop it Minerva, you know I'm not that kind of a person," he muttered. James snorted loudly, earning a stomp on the foot from Logan.  
  
"Sorry," he mouthed. Logan ignored him and pressed on.  
  
They finally reached the entrance to the Slytherin's common room. "Pureblood," Sirius whispered. They walked into the common room.  
  
"You'd find more cheer in a Funeral home," Lily said disgustedly.  
  
"How did you know the password to get in here?" Kobe asked Sirius.  
  
"My cousin's, Bellatrix and Narcissa are in this house," He said. He tried to sound normal, but his eyes betrayed his feelings of bitterness and disgust.  
  
'I need to learn more about him,' Brittney thought  
  
*Why though?*  
  
'I think someone is starting to see someone in a bit differently' the lighter voice in her head said.  
  
*I need a new hobby,* the darker voice in her head acknowledged.  
  
She had been mentally arguing with herself so long, that when she came out of her revere, she felt Sirius tugging at her shirt sleeve.  
  
"I'll get Trixie," Lily said.  
  
"I got Narcissa," Sirius added.  
  
"Malfoy," Brittney said.  
  
"Snivellus," James said.  
  
"He hasn't done anything wrong," Lily defended.  
  
"Put yourself in my shoes-" James began.  
  
"I'd die from the stench," Lily muttered.  
  
"He hates me. Besides, the only reason you're sticking up for him is because you don't know him," James said.  
  
"Why don't we finish our jobs and talk about this when we get in the common room again?" Remus said.  
  
"Terrific idea, why didn't I think of that before?" Kobe said, faking shock.  
  
"Just work," Logan snapped.  
  
Sirius, Brittney, Lily, and James went up to the dorms, while Kobe, Logan, and  
  
Remus set out on the common room. The three downstairs managed to turn the doors gold, the floors red, and get red wallpaper with lions all over.  
  
Meanwhile, in the dorms, the favorite foursome went to work on their victims. What a great awakening for the rest of the school population.  
  
BACK TO THE MORNING."Three, two.one," The marauders counted. The entire Slytherin house walked in the Great Hall. The girls wore Las Vegas showgirl outfits, while the boys looked like Marilyn Manson. And to top it off, the whole house sang "MOBSCENE". It was hilarious. The seven pranksters even managed to get them to jump on the table and do a routine, they were off time though. Dumbledore chuckled silently, then evolved into silent laughing, to all out, rolling on the floor, laughing.  
  
"YOU!" McCgonagall shouted. "YOU TAKE THAT CURSE OFF OR YOU WILL SUFFER THE CONSEQUENSES!" She screamed at the C.Y.  
  
"We weren't the only ones Professor," Lily said innocently. That was easier said than done; the whole house was still doing the morning entertainment, with the entire school laughing, save McCgonagall and Cardel.  
  
"Then who-oh," She said as realization dawned on her. "My office. Now," She said deadly.  
  
They walked to McCgonagall's office. "Sit," she ordered. Brittney and Lily had to conjure up chairs. "What you have done today was inexcusable, inhumane, but damn funny," she started. "However, you shall have 25 points taken from Gryffindor, and you shall serve detention next Thursday. Lupin, Kanaham's, you shall be with Madam Hooch, priming the pitch for the game next month. Kaind, Potter, Evans, Black, you shall be with Filch in the trophy room, and God help me if there is one speck of dust or grime on those Gryffindor trophies. Be at your spots at 7:00 P.M." She said. If it weren't for the fact that she said the prank was funny, Lily would have been downright nervous, like before a Basketball game.  
  
"Now off to Divination," She ordered.  
  
The boys and girls separated after being forced to take the charm off of the Slytherins. The C.Y. took the long way, just making it, while the Marauders took the short cut, still having five minutes to spare.  
  
The ladder opened up and the girls climbed up. Lily and Kobe were sweating, Brittney clutched a stitch in her side, and Logan kept on gasping for air.  
  
"Good morning class," a misty voice said from the shadows. Lily jumped suddenly as she sat down in a pouf next to the window.  
  
"I am your new Divination professor, Professor Trelawny. Seeing as Professor Zelcorm has just passed on," she said. Lily tuned out her introduction seminar, or more appropriately, the speech of death.  
  
Lily began really staring at Trelawny. She looked thin, like Annette Maryland, the school anorexic.  
  
Lily leaned over to Brittney. "Are you sure that's our new professor?" She asked.  
  
"Yup," Brittney replied.  
  
"She looks like a bug," Lily said repulsed.  
  
The girls laughed so hard at that comment, that Trelawny stopped her speech of death to look at the girls reproachfully.  
  
"Something wrong girls?" Trelawny asked. She batted her eyelashes which only made the girls laugh harder.  
  
"Nothing's wrong professor," Logan said quickly while she and Kobe kicked Lily and Brittney in the shins.  
  
Trelawny gave them a stern look before returning to her lecture.  
  
"That was a good one stripes,'' Brittney whispered to Lily.  
  
"Thanks," She answered.  
  
Lunch soon rolled around and Sirius wouldn't quit poking Lily.  
  
"Stop," she said.  
  
"No,"  
  
"Stop,"  
  
"No," he said while getting ready to poke her in the shoulder again; however, Lily gripped his index finger and bent it backwards.  
  
"Either you stop poking me, or I break your finger and not think twice about it," Lily said menacingly, all the while bending his finger farther backwards.  
  
"Ok," he said.  
  
"WELCOME TO HOGWART'S FIRST QUIDDITCH MATCH OF THE YEAR, WITH GRYFFINDOR VERSES SLYTHERIN!" The announcer said.  
  
The girls whooped and cheered their team on.  
  
"FOR THE GRYFFINDOR TEAM. I GIVE YOU.CHASERS POTTER, BLACK, AND JHONSON, KEEPER, THEODORE WOOD, BEATERS LUPIN AND SPINNET, AND SEEKER MARYLAND," Carter Jordan said enthusiastically. (her brother Josh, sorry for the mistake.)  
  
With much less enthusiasm he announced the Slytherin team. "I GIVE YOU CHASERS CRABBE, KELSO, and LESTRANGE. BEATERS NOTT AND GOYLE, KEEPER MORROCO FLINT, AND SEEKER AIDAN KALLIBAR,"  
  
The game was under way. "Potter passes to Johnson, Oh, intercepted, no, Black gets it from Lestrange, passes to Potter and HE SCORES!" Carter said.  
  
"Lupin chucks a particularly evil bludgers that nearly caused me to permanently not reproduce-,"  
  
"JORDAN," McCgonagall warned.  
  
"Sorry, anyway, he chucks to Kallibar who takes it in a sensitive area, nice shot Lupin, Oh Maryland has seen the snitch, GO GET 'EM," Carter screamed.  
  
Josh pulled back into the air, his skin and bone hand grasped frailly, but firmly around the snitch. 


	9. Helping and dreaming

A/N: Thanks to every one who has reviewed. But Mackenzie, I never intended to make a mockery of Mr. Manson, that's just how I wrote the story, I never said that he was stupid, I was going off of the video. I'm sorry if I offended you. ON WITH THE STORY.  
Lily sat in the common room late after Christmas. It was right before a full moon. She sat there doing her four foot long potions essay, when she heard the soft thump of feet on steps.  
  
"What are you doing down here?" Remus's voice called hoarsely. Lily winced; she always hated that she couldn't be there to help ease the pain when he transformed.  
  
"Potions essay," was her reply. "What about you?" she asked, knowing the answer. Knowing since she was eight and had befriended him.  
  
*****FLASHBACK********  
  
Eight year old Remus looked frightened at Lily. He had just found out about his condition last week and the full moon was that night. "What's wrong Remus?" she asked.  
  
He turned to start walking away from the first friend, only friend, and best friend he ever had.  
  
She put her hand on his shoulder. He turned abruptly, which caused her shirt sleeve to fall, revealing a large welt across her forearm.  
  
"What's that?" he asked, trying to dodge the question. She pulled her hand back abruptly to cover the injury.  
  
"We got into a fight with our belts at karate, that's all," she lied. "Now what's wrong, you've been avoiding and ignoring me all day. Spill," she said.  
  
"Come to my house after school," was all he said.  
  
"OK,"  
  
She knocked on his door with her bruised and broken hand. 'I need to be better.' She thought.  
  
Just then, the door opened to reveal a very pale, disheveled looking Mrs. Lupin.  
  
"Come in," she said monotonously. "He's up in his room," she told Lily. Lily walked up the stairs, into his dimly lit room. He sat there on his bed. He looked like he was crying.  
  
"Remus?" Lily asked uncertainly.  
  
With a cry of pain, he flung his arms around Lily. "I'm a werewolf," he cried into her shoulder.  
  
"Are you sure you don't just have lots of facial hair?" she asked, trying to enlighten the mood.  
  
"No, I turn into a fully fledged dog, my first time is tonight," he cried. It hurt to see him so scared, so unsure of what to do anymore. "You can stay if you want," he told her meekly, but his eyes begged her to stay.  
  
She thought 'if I stay here, I help my brother.'  
  
"We are family, family means we stick together. Either I will find a cure, or I'll make darn sure I'm there to help," she said to him firmly.  
  
She wrapped her arms around his upper back as he sobbed into her shoulder, thinking about the new weight that had just been put on her shoulders.  
*****END******  
  
"That time of the month," he smirked.  
  
"Come here," she said. He sat down next to her. She put her arm around him in a family way. "PMSing?"  
  
"Prissy man syndrome," he said.  
  
"I'm really sorry about that," she said, referring to the cause of all his pain.  
  
"Heh," he grunted. "I've been with it for seven years, but it would still be nice, not to dread the moon,"  
  
"I'm going to find a way to help," she told him.  
  
"It's nice to know you're determined.  
  
"'Night," she said, seeing as he helped her finish her homework.  
  
"'Night," he replied while giving her a kiss on the cheek.  
  
They both walked up to their respective dorms and fell asleep.  
  
((((((((((((((((((((((((DREAM)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))  
  
"The werewolf is different from other wolves, due to the fact that, namely,  
  
werewolves are regular humans every other day of the month. Animagus's and other  
  
animals are able to be around the werewolf and not suffer the symptoms, for werewolves  
  
are only a danger to humans."  
  
((((((((((((((((((((((((((END))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))  
  
Lily woke up suddenly, realizing what had to be done to help Remus. She decided  
  
to tell the girls about her idea at breakfast and fell back to sleep.  
  
"Hurry up. I need to tell you something," Lily yelled at her friends.  
  
"You're one to talk. You don't even have your pants on," Brittney shot back. She  
  
pulled on her skirt and robes and walked out the door.  
  
"I'm still amazed that Cardel hasn't taken points off for dressing 'inappropriately'  
  
as he put it," Logan  
  
"Oh Dumbledore had a chat with all the staff, seeing as I refused to wear skirts.  
  
And I was still in the dress code, so they had no way to punish me," Lily answered.  
  
Lily and her friends sat down at the breakfast table. "Alright listen," she told them.  
  
"You want to do something that is not only breaking every school rule ever made, but is  
  
breaking every law, clause, and technicality, plus we could get expelled, prison bound,  
  
and life in Azkaban?" She asked them darkly.  
  
"Who wouldn't," Brittney said brightly.  
  
"I have an idea on how to help Remus. We can make ourselves animagi.  
  
Werewolves are only dangers to humans, not animals," She told them excitedly.  
  
"Yeah," they replied in unison.  
  
"There is a book called Moste Potente Potions in the library, all we need to do is  
  
get the book, there it has all the coolest potion concoctions ever," Logan added.  
  
"You read way to much," Kobe told her sister.  
  
That would be a very interesting term when they returned to school. 


	10. Stripes, Fang, Sparky, and Talons

"Could I just be a reserve?" Lily asked incredulously as she followed James down the corridor.  
  
She knew she was good at quidditch, but because she was born a female, not a male, no one would give her a shot to prove herself to other people.  
  
"No. I haven't had girls on my team before, and I won't have them now," he told her shortly before sauntering off.  
  
Lily growled before catching up to Brittney, Kobe, and Logan on there way to Gryffindor tower.  
  
"Still won't let you on the team eh?" Logan asked nonchalantly.  
  
"Does the scowl tell you anything?" Brittney inquired.  
  
"Of course," Logan replied exasperatedly. "'Cause I r smart."  
  
"I have no relation to you anymore," Kobe sarcastically said.  
  
"The Doppelganger theory then?" Lily asked.  
  
"Guzzuntite," Brittney said.  
  
"It means, a double," Lily told them as they walked up the stairs to their dorms.  
  
"Well go find your doppelloser then," a snobbish voice said from the bed closest to the door.  
  
"Found her," Lily said brightly.  
  
"Uh, don't even talk to me," Coral Wellington ordered.  
  
"I must be losing my damn mind, I never knew Gorillas were capable of human speech," Brittney said.  
  
Coral sputtered before stalking out the door.  
  
"Her special-ed classes are really-," Kobe started.  
  
"Impressive. She can do more than grunt now," Logan finished.  
  
"Okay, that's,-" Lily started.  
  
"Really creepy," Brittney ended.  
  
"You should talk," Kobe retorted.  
  
"Shut up," Brittney whispered. "Now do you have the book?" she asked Logan.  
  
"No," she replied.  
  
"Why not?" Lily inquired.  
  
"Yeah, why not," Brittney asked.  
  
"I haven't been to the library yet," Logan told them all.  
  
"We need to get there so other people don't get the book," Brittney said.  
  
"Well how many people are looking for the book?" Kobe said.  
  
"I don't know," Logan whined exasperatedly. 'But I still want to get there before other people find the book so I can help Remus,' she thought.  
  
"Dude. Snap out of it," Brittney said.  
  
"Alright, how do we know what animals we are changing into?" Lily asked.  
  
"It kind of picks for you. You pick a certain characteristic or two, and then it finds The animal it would fit best. Kind of an automated choosing system," Logan replied.  
  
"Ohhhh," Lily said. "Well how long will it take to get done?" she asked.  
  
"If we get all the ingredients without any hassle, then it should take about four months," Kobe answered.  
  
"Well let's get started," Brittney encouraged.  
  
They went to the library later that day and found the book. Well, almost. They had managed to get a signature from Flitwick, saying it was for a potions project.  
  
"I told you Flitwick always favored you Lily," Kobe said. But the problem was That the marauders had already checked the book out two years ago, and kept renewing it.  
  
"Come on Prongs," They heard Sirius say as they walked through the entrance to the library.  
  
"Well I'm moving," James retorted.  
  
"Hey, I have an idea," Logan whispered from behind the bookshelf, where they had an entire view of what was happening at the entrance.  
  
"Kobe," Logan said. "I want you to levitate something of theirs and make sure that they notice it. Brittney, you go to entrance to the girls bathroom on the fourth floor and wait. I will go to the common room. Stripes, while they are looking for whatever they 'dropped,' Logan said while using quote marks around 'dropped.' "You grab the book and run," She finished.  
  
"Like an obstacle course," Lily said.  
  
"Yeah," Logan replied.  
  
Kobe stayed behind the shelf while Lily strategically placed her within striking range of the book. Brittney and Logan ran to their spots. "Wingarduim Leviosa," Kobe muttered.  
  
James's and Sirius's cloaks both floated up into the air. They knocked over a book. It landed with a loud thump on the floor.  
  
James and Sirius both whirled around to find the source of the noise, moving about a foot away from the counter. Lily took this opportunity to grab the book. There was the soft swish of a book sliding off of wood.  
  
'We're home free,' she thought as she turned the handle on the door. Not for long. James heard the handle turn and whirled around.  
  
"Give that back!" he whispered loudly.  
  
"Shit," Lily muttered under her breath. She took off. The door swung as James followed. It hit his shoulder. He swore loudly as he tailed Lily.  
  
She ran fast. Lily heard James tearing after her, his feet echoing loudly on the stone floor.  
  
"Run," she told herself. Then she heard words echoing in her head. "YOU'RE WORTHLESS. YOU COULDN'T RUN IF YOUR LIFE DAMN DEPENDED ON IT. AND YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST DO WHAT EVER YOU WANT, BUT YOU CAN'T. YOU'RE NOT GOOD ENOUGH, AND YOU NEVER, IN YOUR ENTIRE FUCKING LIFE WILL BE. SO GET OVER IT AND QUIT TRYING TO BE SOMEONE WHO IS SO MUCH BETTER THAN YOU EVER WILL BE. I WISH YOU WERE NEVER BORN. AT LEAST I WOULD'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH SUCH A BITCHY, RUDE, UNGRATEFUL BRAT LIKE YOU,"  
  
She shook her head. 'I can. You just watch me,' she thought. It was then that she realized that she had run into a corner.  
  
James circled in on her like a hawk about to descend on its prey.  
  
"Give the book back," he snarled, out of breath. She backed up against the wall. Her eyes darted back and forth, trying to find a way out of her predicament.  
  
James was now less than a foot away from her. She tried her left. He just put his hand near her head.  
  
She tried her right. He put his other hand next to her head. He wasn't going to let her go without a fight.  
  
Then she realized that he had his legs spread apart. She faked right, and then dropped. She slid out from him. 'He smells nice. Manly,' she thought to herself as she got up and ran. 'Wait. Where did that come from?' wondered Lily. "This is the stairs to the fourth floor, where Fang is," Lily realized. She skipped the stairs four at a time.  
  
There at the door, stood Brittney. "Run!" she screamed. James was now two steps away from her. So she sprinted. Then out from behind a gargoyle statue came Sirius.  
  
"How many of you are there?" Lily yelled. She baseball slid to the ground. "CATCH!" she yelled to Brittney. Lily slid the book on the ground. It stopped four feet between Sirius and Brittney.  
  
Brittney and Sirius looked at each other. She smirked. He wondered why. Brittney snatched the book from the floor and ran. "HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT. THE FIRST ONE'S FREE," She said whilst slapping the side of her hip. Sirius took off after her. James started to, but Lily tripped him. He landed on the ground.  
  
"Why'd you take the book," he spat.  
  
"Because I want to help him too," she told him. His angry expression changed to one of confusion. "Come on," she said. He got up and followed her to the gargoyle Sirius jumped from.  
  
"We want to become animagi too. I promised him I'd be there to help. But don't tell him. I want it to be a surprise. Please?" she said. Realization dawned across his face. She was just trying to be there.  
  
"Sure," he replied. Lily looked him in the eye. He just realized how green her eyes were.  
  
"JAMSIE POOSEM!" a screechy voice screamed.  
  
"Help me," he mouthed.  
  
"Oh no. This, you're going to dig yourself out of."  
  
James turned. Harriet Foyer flung her arms around him and started planting kisses all over his face. Lily smiled. He noticed how pink and soft her lips looked. They looked much better than Harriet's did. Lily snorted before walking off.  
  
**************************** FOUR MONTHS LATER.******************  
  
"We've done it," Lily said. "We are about to become animagi."  
  
"Soup's on," Logan said, eyeing the cauldron with distaste.  
  
"Hoorah. Hey, what are your guy's characteristics going to be?" Logan asked.  
  
"I want independence. I also have a scar shaped like an 'x' on my neck" Lily said whilst showing them the scar.  
  
"I want elegancy and my earring holes," Brittney said.  
  
"I want loyalty and that scar I got in first year, when we found out the rest of your abilities," Logan said.  
  
"For me, well I want my eye color and freedom," Kobe finished.  
  
"Let's drink this before I back out," Brittney said.  
  
They each filled their glasses to the brim. "Cheers," they echoed. They clanked their glasses and drank. Lily dropped to the floor. She grabbed her stomach in pain. Her fingers morphed into paws, her spine lengthened, and her teeth elongated. Her gasps became more like grunts and growls.  
  
Then, as soon as it started, it stopped. She tried to yell, but all that came out, was a loud roar. She looked down. Her paws were orange with black stripes going up her arms. She looked into the mirror. 'I'm a Bengal tiger,' she realized as her jade green eyes widened.  
  
They had always called each other nick names. Stripes for the stripes on her American flag. Fang for Brittney's slightly long canines. Sparky, because Logan loved dogs, and talons because a phoenix attacked Kobe. Now they were going to call each other those names for entirely different reasons.  
  
Brittney stood up on her four legs. She looked elegant alright, but wouldn't any black panther. She was shiny black with three white spots on both of her ears. Her eyes were the same light brown.  
  
Logan wobbled before toppling over again. A white wolf, with a stripe of black where the barely visible scar was.  
  
An eagle's call was heard. Kobe flapped her wings and flew onto the sink. A bald eagle with amethyst eyes stood there, staring at all the other animals.  
  
They looked at each other. Oh the possibilities.  
  
Boomslang skin, forty galleons.  
  
Eye of a newt. Twenty-seven sickles.  
  
Seeing the look on your friends face as they transform,  
priceless.  
  
April 14, Classes were over.  
  
"Time to go," Sirius said somberly. Watching Remus transform always depressed him. They snuck quietly out of the common room.  
  
"Moony, you have visitors," James said as they entered the Shrieking shack. A severe grunt of pain was all that was heard from Remus.  
  
The girls looked with shock at his unusually straight back, and rigid form on the bed.  
  
They sat like that for around five minutes. Then the loud gasp and half yell got Logan a grimace.  
  
"Lay down," Logan ordered.  
  
The sitting Remus looked at her with a pained expression, mixed in with confusion.  
  
Logan sat in front of him.  
  
She put a hand on his chest and another on his middle back. Then she gently pushed him down, but still supported him. She rolled him over, so he was now laying, rigid, on his stomach.  
  
"Our mom is in massage therapy at St. Mungos," Logan told Remus. "Where does it hurt the most?" she asked him.  
  
"My lower back," he moaned. She pressed gently on his spine, then moved her hands to the muscles next to the spine and started massaging, working her way up.  
  
"Feeling better?'' she asked softly after a while.  
  
"Mmmhmmmm," he replied. She rubbed the muscles around his shoulders, shoulder blades, and middle back.  
  
Suddenly, he started to growl.  
  
"Every one change now," Sirius ordered.  
  
Where the six students once stood, now held a tiger, a stag, a shaggy dog, a wolf, a black panther, and a bald eagle. They watched Remus go from human, to animal. 


	11. The other half of the night & the bet

Lily watched Remus's face contort and convert to an animal.  
  
His screams of pain and agony became more like howls and barks. He crouched on the floor as his body became more dog-ish like.  
  
Soon, his last remembrance of humanity and friends left his mind as he became a true animal.  
  
He spotted Lily, the most different looking of the others. His wolf mind already recognized James and Sirius.  
  
He still didn't like Brittney or Logan, but Brittney's fur looked a lot like Sirius's and Logan was built like him. He hadn't noticed Kobe yet.  
  
He growled at Lily. She backed up towards the door, but Remus took it as a challenge. He lunged.  
  
James rammed the door open, giving her space to run. She ran faster, and faster. Finally, she saw way out through the whomping willow.  
  
The rest of the group followed. They finally managed to get up through the entrance after Remus, who had been on Lily's tail, and saw Lily transform back into a human. 'What is she doing?' Brittney thought.  
  
As if reading her mind, Lily yelled, "I CAN RUN FASTER WITH TWO LEGS, THEN WITH FOUR!"  
  
There was a tree a hundred feet from Lily, with branches around four feet above her.  
  
She closed her eyes and breathed deeply. There was a strong gust of wind and she ran faster than before.  
  
She leapt up and managed to grab the lowest branch and swung herself up. She swung up farther, out of reach of Remus.  
  
She crouched on all fours on a particularly thick branch. In the distance, she heard what sounded like snickering coming from James.  
  
She concentrated back on becoming a tiger again. She got a rather ticklish feeling in her arms and legs as she transformed.  
  
She leapt down from her perch to lower branches.  
  
Then she jumped to the ground. Almost instantly, Remus attacked her side. Lily fell to the ground as she got the wind knocked out of her.  
  
He stood back, waiting for her to get up and accept the face off.  
  
Lily lay there, for a little bit, trying to regain her breath.  
  
When her head stopped spinning, she got up and lunged at Remus.  
  
They tumbled down to the edge of the lake. He bit her throat and applied pressure.  
  
Brittney, Kobe and Logan took off to try and help her. Lily put her paw at the base of Remus's neck.  
  
She flexed, so he could feel her claw. He backed off as she got up.  
  
Lily locked eyes with Remus. He saw that she meant no harm. What really convinced him was Lily lying on her back, exposing her stomach.  
  
That was a sign of friendship. He bowed his head down to tell her he got the message.  
  
He looked over at Brittney. She followed Lily's example and lay on her stomach. He bowed his head again.  
  
He now looked for the first time at Kobe.  
  
She tried to walk, but fell head first into the grass. So she flew over to him and bowed down to expose her neck.  
  
He licked her back to show he accepted her peace offering.  
  
Remus looked pretty arrogantly at Logan. She decided to try and lower his ego her own way.  
  
He locked eyes with her, telling her to bow down to him.  
  
She just dog smirked at him before taking off. He wasn't going to let her go that easily.  
  
She ran around Hagrid's hut with Remus on her tail. She sped up. So did Remus.  
  
She turned abruptly towards the Forbidden Forest. Remus was determined to get her to show him respect.  
  
He growled and sped up. There were flashes of white in between the trees as Logan sped up, slowed down, and twisted elegantly to try and avoid Remus.  
  
Remus ran ahead of her to cut her off.  
  
Logan stopped to catch her breath. Panting, she looked out from between two trees.  
  
It looked, for once, like they were actually getting along. Kobe and James were racing each other, Sirius, Brittney, and Lily were wrestling, Remus's breath on her neck-wait.  
  
Logan slowly turned her head. Remus looked her dead in the eye, telling her not to run.  
  
She walked out of the forest slowly. Remus followed her. She flopped onto her back, panting.  
  
He licked her cheek, and then ran off to join in the wrestling match.  
  
Logan got up and shook her head. When he was thinking clearly, he acted rather shy, but when he was a werewolf, he acted the complete opposite.  
  
After a few hours of just goofing around, they led Remus back down to the shack.  
  
The six trudged up to the common room.  
  
But only Brittney, Logan, Kobe, and Sirius went up to their respective dorms. Lily flopped down on the couch. "Budge up Evans," She heard James say.  
  
"I was here first," she retorted.  
  
"Fine," he said. The space in front of her sunk as James lay down.  
  
"What the hell are you doing?" the half asleep Lily mumbled.  
  
"It's called sharing. You should take a crash course on it sometime," James said. His reply was Lily's silent breath on the back of his neck. It sent shivers down his spine, and he sort of liked it.  
  
"Evans," he whined. "This is where I sleep every full moon, now move."  
  
"If you don't like it, find another spot to sleep every full moon on the other side of the couch," she said calmly. "I ain't movin'."  
  
"You're just drawn to my charm eh?" he asked suggestively.  
  
"Dream on dirt bag. I'm just too tired to move." She snapped. "But I do admire you in some ways."  
  
"Like how?" he asked.  
  
"Like how you manage to help Remus, be flirtatiously stupid to the non-idiotic side of humanity, and still be Captain of the Quidditch team," she told him.  
  
"Thanks for the compliment. I think," he said while putting on a thoughtful face.  
  
"And speaking of quidditch," Lily started.  
  
"Oh no, here it comes," he groaned. James turned to face Lily. "Just say it, don't spray it."  
  
"Why won't you let me on the team? I can do it, just give me a chance to at least prove something," she pleaded.  
  
"Because it's been an all guy tradition, it's an all guy sport, and guys are better at anything than girls are," he told her.  
  
"I'm surprised at the number of girls who are willing to sleep with you. I mean, your gender bias ways are probably the biggest turn off known to man kind," Lily spat.  
  
"So I have things that turn you on?" he said seductively.  
  
"You are the most insensitive, one track minded, egotistical jerk I have ever heard of," she said, while rolling her eyes.  
  
"Ah, but you have heard of me," he said.  
  
"How did we even get on this subject?" she asked him.  
  
"You started it," he said.  
  
"Well I'm finishing it," she replied.  
  
"Fine. Good night," he said. James turned around and fell asleep.  
  
"I'll get on that quidditch team if it's the last thing I do," she told herself before falling asleep as well.  
  
"STRIPES YOU ARE SLEEPING NEXT TO POTTER!!!" Logan screamed into Lily's ear.  
  
"I am? HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I am!" Lily yelled. She kicked James in the back so he fell on the floor.  
  
"Don't kick me too hard. I mean God," he complained.  
  
"Go whine to someone who cares," Lily sapped.  
  
"Okay-," Brittney started.  
  
"Don't ask. I don't even know how that happened. We probably got tired and fell asleep on the first thing with stuffing," Lily explained.  
  
"You shouldn't talk about yourself like that," Sirius said in mock concern.  
  
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me," Lily said shortly.  
  
"Come on, lets get some breakfast," Kobe said.  
  
The C.Y. trudged down to the Great Hall.  
  
"I'm getting on the quidditch team and make him eat those words," Lily growled. She cracked her knuckles.  
  
"Stripes?" Kobe asked. "Giving yourself premature arthritis won't get you on the quidditch team."  
  
"I know. But look at him. The jack-ass. He just sits there, while the girls come to him, looking like the hoes they are. They haven't won the quidditch cup for years. The only way they are still in the running, is Maryland caught the snitch because the Slytherin hogie was too busy looking stupid. HE WON"T LET ME BE EVEN A RESERVE." Lily said while speaking slightly louder on the last part.  
  
They finished their oatmeal and headed out of the Great Hall to potions.  
  
"Well do something about it then," Brittney told her.  
  
"I would, but how am I supposed to get even a chance to argue about it. They'd have me with Cardel before I could say Applebee Arrows," Lily replied.  
  
"You'll find a way. You always do," Logan said. They walked into the potions dungeon.  
  
"Good morning Slytherins, others," he said. "I have decided to try out a group project in hopes of raising the Gryffindor's abysmal grades," he continued while the Slytherins sniggered. "So I shall pair you up with someone of your opposite house." The Slytherins stopped. "Here it goes. Potter, Snape. Kaind, Crabbe."  
  
"Remember no big words, shiny objects, and keep your hands in sight at all times," Logan reminded Brittney.  
  
"Kanaham, Lestrange,"  
  
"Karma sucks," Kobe said.  
  
"Kanaham, Black,"  
  
"Professor, which one?" Logan asked.  
  
"Bellatrix. And last, Malfoy, Evans."  
  
"Why couldn't I get stuck with Snape, if you don't bug him, he don't bug you," Lily muttered.  
  
"Go to your partners. NOW!"  
  
Lily wouldn't move, and neither would Malfoy. But after a little persuading and threatening by Lily, Malfoy drug his cauldron over to Lily's table.  
  
"You know, for a mudblood, you don't look half bad," Malfoy said seductively.  
  
"And I love your shirt, did your husband by it for you?" Lily shot back.  
  
"That hurts," Malfoy replied sarcastically.  
  
"Really? Well I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my ass," Lily said.  
  
"You know, you seem like the person to gamble with, so how about we make a bet," he started.  
  
"Let's pretend that I'm interested."  
  
"Well, how about, since you might actually be a challenge, if I can 'court' you, you start respecting all purebloods, pay the entire house forty galleons each, and wear a skirt for a week. And we'll give me a week to do this, so if I can't ummmm,"  
  
"Screw me?" Lily implied helpfully.  
  
"Yes, Screw you, then I have to.." He pondered.  
  
"How about this. You walk around in a dress, dye your hair pink, disguise your voice, and ask Potter out. You also pay the whole house, forty galleons, five sickles, and ten knuts," Lily said.  
  
"Seems fair. Deal?" he asked.  
  
"Deal," she answered. They shook hands and the bet was on. 


	12. The massacre and the offer

       Potions were soon over and the marauders and the C.Y. walked to care of magical creatures. "I really hope Kettleburn doesn't bring out unicorns again," Brittney complained.

      "Why, unicorns are girlish, you're girls. It's simple logic," Sirius stated.

      "Unicorns are for four year olds and the perk'n'prisses you shag 24/7 Black," she retorted. 

      "Simple logic for a simple mind eh Padfoot," James added while clasping his best friend on the back. 

      "It's amazing at how little you know us. I mean, you've spent a whole, total, approximately three weeks with us." Brittney said jauntily.

      "Isn't approximately kind of a big word for you?" Sirius asked playfully.

      "I'm surprised you remembered I said it," Brittney retorted.

      A loud hoot came from somewhere behind the seven people. THUD. "Airz, what are you doing on my head? Hold still and I'll get whatever it is you brought," Lily said irritably. She started to try and untie the knot around her eagle/snowy owl mix. "Now I know why you were so eager to find me," Lily grumbled.

      "Here, let the real master do the work," James said arrogantly.

      "Remembering how to tie and untie your shoes doesn't exactly qualify you as a master," Lily snorted.

      "Sniff, sniff. I'm so hurt. You emotionally scarred me for life," James fake whined.

     "If you don't put what little of a brain you have to work, Airz'll scar you for life as well," Brittney reminded him.

      They walked towards the paddock with Airz getting particularly annoyed at still having the circulation cut off of his foot. "Almost there. Got it," James said to himself.

      "Gimme the package," Lily ordered.

      "Gimme's don't get," Sirius said while trying to get the package from James.

      "Potter, just give her the package," Logan told him. She glared, and that was never a good sign.

      "Fine. Baby," he retorted.

      "Shut up while you're still behind Potter," Kobe said.

      Lily grabbed the package, just as they got over to the paddock. The marauders sat next to the C.Y. "Why are you sitting next to us?" Kobe inquired.

      "We wouldn't, but Moony wants to spend quality time with Evans," Sirius said.

      "Yeah, you should be honored to have us sit next to you," James added.

      "What would you like us to do? Suck shine your shoes?" Lily asked the three of them, almost too calmly.

      They would have gone into hexing mode, had not Professor Kettleburn walked in front of the class.

      "Good morning," he stated.

      "Who said?" Sirius asked. He got stuck with Goyle in the potions project, and seemed pretty peeved. 

      Kettleburn chose to ignore this comment and commenced.

      "We will be continuing our study on unic-," 

      There were not one, not four, but seven thumps on the wooden table. "Something wrong?" he asked.

      "Nope. Just seeing how hard the wood is," James replied sheepishly.

      "Why does he always ask stupid questions?" Sirius asked to no one in particular.

     "He's a top of the line professor," Lily said sarcastically. "He states the stupid and notes the obvious."

      The class that heard them sniggered behind their hands. 

      "What did Airz bring?" Logan asked. Lily opened it. The package turned out to be a special edition of the _Daily Prophet_. 

      "It's about the increase of attacks in England. They've even got a picture England from an aerial view, with little 'x's on the places he's attacked. Horizont Ally, Vertic Ally, Kelingburgh. There are 34 places Voldemort raided." Remus said while leaning closely past Logan and looking over Lily's shoulder.

      The bell rang and the seven bickered their way to the Great Hall for lunch. Lily, Brittney, Logan, Kobe, James, Sirius, and Remus sat down for lunch. "Good afternoon peoples," Professor Dumbledore said while standing up. "Seeing as the Quidditch final is coming up, by the way, Congratulations to Both Gryffindor and Slytherin for their superb flying, but I wish to hold a hogsmeade trip in their honor, the week before the match. Carriages will leave at 10:00 a.m. sharp. So good luck to the houses, and happy shopping," Dumbledore finished before sitting back down.

      "Thank God," Sirius exclaimed. "I need to visit Zonko's."

      "Don't forget about Honeydukes," Logan said.

      "Or Deverish and Bangs," Kobe included.

      "I don't think we should go," Lily said quietly.

      "WHAT!" They all rounded on her. 

      "I've got a bad feeling about this, and I've been told to listen to my instincts. Look, something bad is going to happen and I don't want any of us to get caught in the middle," she defended

      "Other than your gut, which probably is just hungry, what other evidence do you have?" James questioned.

      "Well, okay I don't, but I don't think we should go," Lily pleaded.

     "If you can find more believable evidence than your gut, we won't go," Brittney said with finality in her tone.

      'I need to get them not to go,' Lily thought.

      The bell rang, signaling the students to get to class. History of Magic was, as usual, boring. Charms, well, Sirius couldn't talk for a while, due to Kobe putting the silencing charm on him instead of her toad.

"DINNER TIME!" Remus and Logan screamed at the top of their lungs. The two raced into the great hall, slipping on the floor.

      "Your sister is a total doop," Brittney told Kobe.

      "Hey, great minds think alike," Kobe retorted.

      "Tell me when the great minds get here," Lily said.

      "Well that was rude," James said.

      "The only time someone is rude, is when the person who says the other person is rude is rude. Because the person, who says the other person is rude, is being rude because the person who is being told they're rude, find that rude," Lily explained 'simply.'

      "Could you repeat that?" Sirius said innocently. Brittney smacked him upside the head. "Ouch."

      Dinner was an interesting affair. James threw His corn at a Ravenclaw, who thought it was a Slytherin, who really threw it at a Hufflepuff, who thought it was a Gryffindor, who really threw it at a Ravenclaw. Well, it ended up in a food fight, so big, even McCgonagall joined. After all, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.

      Dinner ended early because the house-elves couldn't make the food fast enough. But Lily and James both got a detention, to be served the day before the Hogsmeade trip. Lily stayed behind to talk to Dumbledore.

      "Professor, could I talk to you about the Hogsmeade trip next week?" she asked.

      "What of it Miss, Evans?" he questioned.

      "I have a bad feeling about it. Couldn't you reschedule it or something?" 

      "Why?"

      "I think that something's going to happen and I don't want anyone to get caught in the middle of it."

      "I'm sorry, but I won't change anything. You need to supply more evidence before I will change the date." He told her.

      "But something bad is going to happen, trust me," she pleaded.

     "Not until you have more than a feeling," he said finally. Lily rolled her eyes. 

      "I can't lose them to whatever it is that's coming," she told herself before sauntering out the door.

      Lily had been pleading with the professors all week, to get them to reschedule. Her replies were nothing but, "no's." 

      "Just one more professor to go, but she'll probably just shoo me out too. I mean, being dubbed as the fun-sucker, not many people believe you," she said to herself. On the way to Transfiguration, her bag split. "Great. Now I'm going to be late, and I suck in that class," she complained.

      "Talking to yourself is the first sign of insanity Evans," a voice said from behind her.

      "Screw off Malfoy, I'm not in the mood," she snarled.

      "Interesting choice of words," he replied.

      She gathered her things in her arms, almost falling forward at the weight.

      "Here, let me help you," Malfoy said oily.

      "I'm not helpless. I can do it myself," she snapped angrily. The hallway was now deserted, and she was five minutes late for Transfiguration.

      "I'm late to class, so I'll finish this conversation later,"

      "Why not finish it now and save the time," he said while pushing her up against the wall.

      "You have egg in your teeth," she said disgustedly. 

      "Would you like to get it out?" he said suggestively.

      "One, that's disgusting, two, I'm supposed to not sleep with you, three, I just brushed my teeth."

      He fumbled around in his mouth, to get the egg. "Better?" he asked, while showing her his teeth.

      "Somewhat, now go find Black's cousin. She'd probably be more willing than I am."

      "But not as beautiful," he leaned in, while his hands dropped from her hands, to her shoulders.

      "Thank God for Tang soo Doe," she said to herself. She straightened her hand, for sudo power, and, with lightning speed and power, brought the pinkie side of her hand down to meet his temple. 

      Centimeters from her face, Malfoy's eyes went cross, and he smiled stupidly before falling on the ground in a heap.

      "Now I'm going to have to burn these clothes," she acknowledged.

      Fifteen minutes later, she arrived to Transfiguration. "Evans, could you give a believable excuse as to why you were late to class?" McCgonagall asked.

      "Malfoy," she said simply. Lily slid in between Brittney and Logan.

      "I want to speak to you after class, Evans," McCgonagall ordered.

      "What did Malfoy do?" Kobe asked from behind. 

      "I made a bet with him. If he could screw me with in a week, I had to pay the Slytherprisses forty galleons, wear a skirt, and a whole bunch of other stuff,"

      "What was the other half of the bet?"

      "You'll find out next Monday," she told them. 

      Transfiguration was over and Lily made her way over to Professor McCgonagall's desk. "Now I want you to explain to me why Malfoy held you up so you were twenty minutes late to class," McCgonagall said sternly. She fixed Lily with an intense glare.

      "Well, I was in the library, doing some catch-up work in potions. Malfoy came up and we got into an argument about when you should add newt's eyes to the shrinking potion, and we lost track of time," Lily said hurriedly. Her face was covered by a carefully guarded mask, that she wouldn't let anyone see, and she had the power to not let her emotions go to her eyes, which was exactly where McCgonagall looked.

      "Very well,"

      "Erm, Professor. I know you," Lily started.

      "Yes I know, and I won't change anything until you have more proof," McCgonagall said.

      "HUgggg," Lily said while rolling her eyes and stomping out of the classroom, leaving little dents in the stone floor.

      THE DAY OF THE TRIP…

      "GET UP YOU LAZY BUMS," Brittney yelled at the three sleepers. 

      Logan just rolled over. Kobe, well, she sang what sounded like "I love you, you love me. Let's get together and kill Brittney, with a manticore, now she's on the floor. No more Brittney anymore,"

      "Fifteen more minutes," Lily said while lifting her arm up and flapping her wrist rather violently, up and down. 

      "No. Today is the Hogsmeade trip,"

      "Then how about five more hours?" Lily asked.

      "I'll make you a deal. If you start noticing really out of the order things, then we'll leave. If not, then just enjoy the weather," Brittney said.

      "Alright. But anything out of the ordinary, we're outta there. Got it?" Lily accepted.

      The girls met James, Sirius, and Remus at the double doors and got into the carriages.

      "I never realized how bumpy these rides are until now," Kobe revealed. They went right over a dip, causing Logan to be thrown into Remus's lap.

      "Sorry," she mumbled before hurrying back to her spot.

      "Wow Moony. Two girls, I'd a never thought you to be the cheating type," Sirius joked.

      "I'm not Padfoot," Remus retorted hotly.

      "Just jokin', lighten up pal," Sirius said.

      "I'm sorry, it's just the quidditch final coming up," Remus apologized.

      They continued their conversation down the cobblestone street, on their way to the three broomsticks.

      "You'll do fine Remus. If not, well, I'll sock Malfungus for you," Lily assured her brother as she flung her arm around his shoulder. Standing at 6'1'', and him just half an inch above her, it wasn't too much of a stretch.

      "We'll get them, we're better, we can beat them," James added.

      "You said the same sort of speech right before Lily dumped the snow pile down your shirt Prongs," Remus contradicted as they opened up the door to the cozy pub. "You alright Lils?" Remus asked.

      Lily had on a thinking expression, and was clutching her stomach, as though in pain. "I'm fine Rem, don't worry," Lily reassured him. There was an awkward silence between the two.

      "Err; I'll get the drinks, shall I?" Sirius said quickly.

      Remus knew she was lying. _'He always does,'_ she thought. "Yeah, get me a butterbeer Black, please," she said loudly while her jade eyes never left Remus's soft gold. (I'm changing his eye color; I just think he'd look better with gold eyes, not brown.) She handed him a couple of galleons before following Brittney, James, Kobe, and Logan.

      _'She has really intense eyes_._ Like she'll find every lie, secret, and emotion you have inside of you. But they're really deep. She has so many secrets herself, so many layers. I'd love to spend hours staring into her eyes to figure them out, to lose myself in. Jeez, I'm going nutters,'_ James thought_. _'_You're losing it Potter, 'she's_ just a smart, pretty, caring, stubborn-Where am I getting this, she hates me, I hate her; right?' _He questioned himself._

      "Potter, are you okay. You won't quit staring at Stripes," Kobe told him.

      "Yeah, just peachy," He said while shaking his head to rid himself of his thoughts.

      Sirius sat down between James and Brittney, right as Madame Rosmerta brought their drinks.

      "You'd think, that after two years straight of me saying no to Sirius's pleas for firewhiskey, he'd finally give up," Madame Rosmerta told them all cheerfully as she handed out the drinks. She walked away, heels clinking merrily on the wood floor.

      "Cheers," They chorused before clunking their mugs together. 

      James, Sirius, Remus, Brittney, Kobe, and Logan all chugged their drinks, bringing down their mugs with foamy mustaches on their lips.

      But Lily sat there, knowing something bad was going to happen, but couldn't figure it out. Like a brain teaser with no answer. She traced the rim of her mug with her finger, pondering thoughtfully, when a mental picture of the _Daily Prophet _that Airz brought. Her ears perked, and something clicked in her mind. She rammed her head continually into the seat behind her in the booth where they were sitting.

      "Stop it, your going to give yourself brain damage," Sirius told her. 

      She looked at them with realization on her face.

      "There are millions of magical towns and villages here in England. Why would Voldemort choose the most populated ones?" She asked them, knowing the answer.

      "The bigger the population, the more of an impact it is," James told her.

      "Populations like Hogsmeade?" She asked them with a knowing look on her face.

      Kobe's eyes went wide with realization. "But-," She started, but Lily shushed her.

      She hurriedly got out of her seat and exited the door. "What is she doing," Logan asked before getting up to follow. They left a tip on the table.   
      "She knew something bad was going to happen, and she tried to help us, SON OF A BITCH," Brittney yelled the last part as she slammed her fist, extremely hard, on the brick wall of Deverish and Bangs.

      Meanwhile, Lily walked over to where the Hogs Head was. She was almost there; walking in front of a crowd when the explosion happened.

      Lily was thrown backward, scratches and bruises appearing all over her face and arms. She landed, hard, on the stone street. Bodies and body parts rained down upon her. A person's severed head landed not a foot from her, with his eyes wide open, and blood pouring out of his mouth. Worse scenes were even closer, like a person's leg, across her own. Now Lily had a stomach of steel when it came to gross stuff like this, and she nearly threw up. 

      There was terror everywhere, as Death eaters emerged from the revolting pub. 

      "MORDSMORDE!" one shouted. The dark mark appeared above the sappy tea shop. 

      Another explosion happened and more stuff flew on top of the first.

      Lily sat up and saw a little boy crying, his clothes singed, and his blonde hair, matted.

      "Avada Kedavera," A masked Death Eater shouted. The curse was aimed for the little boy.

      Lily ran over to him and scooped him up, just before the curse hit its target.

      The boy screamed and cried loudly. "I want my mommy," he yelled. 'He can't be older than four,' she thought.

      "Shhhhhhhhhhhh, It'll be okay," she cooed him, trying to get past the thronging, terrified, shoppers and residents. A sharp push caused her to stumble. She handed the little boy over to a lady, who took him, and ran.

      Someone threaded their arms through hers and pulled them roughly behind her back. Her unknown attacker steered her through the rest of the corpses, death eaters, and screaming people, to a peace of unoccupied area, right in front of the Hogs Head. 

      Lily looked around. About fifteen feet from her, was James, bruised, bloody, and beaten; and in the same position as her. 

      Her mask of emotion slipped, and for a brief second, he saw true terror on her face before she hid her feelings again. She looked James square in the eye, and told him all he needed to know. "Fight back," was what her eyes told him. He nodded to know he got the message.

      "Such a pretty thing to waste," a death eater acknowledged seductively as he stroked her cheek bone.

      She spat in his face. Then Lily jumped, bending her knees upward, so she thrust her heels into the person in the backs, hot dog. He immedeaty let go of her to care for his property. Whimpering, he kneeled over.

      Lily looked at the death eater who she spat at, and punched him, hard, in the face. He fell over, out cold. 

      Another death eater came at her with a knife like thing, poking out of his wand.

      She grabbed a leg and brought it out in front of her, so it met the knife, full on. The leg didn't do anything but sever at the heel. She looked quickly at the heel, then at the death eater, and shoved the entire foot in the death eater's mouth.

      James saw what she did, and started to copy her, in his own way. They were now side by side, fighting two different death eaters and still managing to watch the one with the foot in his face.

      "GIVES A WHOLE NEW MEANING TO THE TERM, FOOT IN YOUR MOUTH," James shouted to her. She laughed right as she dropped and brought her opponents legs out from beneath him.

      Now back to back, Lily heard a Spanish death eater taunting James. 

      "So now you need a woman to fight your battles eh senior" the man teased.

      "No, he's just smart," Lily replied for him. Lily jump kicked her attacker. She jumped, so her feet were on his shoulders. She pushed off with her legs, and did a graceful twist in the air. Lily flew over James and on the death eater. She stuck her shoe just down his robes, and then pushed off, with him in toe. She breathed deeply and pushed off harder, and flew up higher. She rolled in the air so she still landed, feet first and crushing the death eaters ribs in the process.

      That was how it went on for a while, him watching her back, her watching his. Until they got to the final few. 

      Around half of the population of the city was either dead, or seriously injured.

      James and Lily were finally getting worn out. 

      "STUPEFY," some death eaters shouted.

      All Lily remembered doing, was grabbing James's arm before everything went black.

      Lily groaned. She tried to rub her head, but couldn't, her hands were bound with rope to James's. He was still back to back with her, with his head resting on her shoulder.

      She opened up her eyes, to find the half moon shining down upon the three of them. Wait. The three of them? Lily turned her head slightly, and her jade green eyes, soon met blood red slits.

      "Nice to know you are awake," Lord Voldemort said.

      "What the hell do you want?" she snarled. She felt James stir quietly. '_I'd like to wake up next to him if he was that silent all the time. Huh?'_ Lily gripped his hands to try and tell him to start working the ropes loose.

      "You are what I want. I mean, with your powers, personality, and skill," he started. "Who wouldn't want you?"

      "Pervert," She grumbled.

     "Not like that. I've come to make you an offer. You see, I am a man who always gets what he wants and I want you on my side. So I shall start to explain with your powers. You have untamed athletic ability. You are able to do anything, higher, faster, quicker, sharper, harder, and stronger. You can fight better than three men combined. A good advantage during battle. 

     "You have healing powers. You are able to heal anyone, back to normal health. Soldiers wouldn't have to take time to go to hospitals. You could just heal them on the battle field.

      "You're telekinetic. You can move things with your mind, are able to put whole troops to the ground, with just one motion. You could build things without needing a wand, or the mudblood way.

      "You are capable of wandless magic. If you were without a wand, you could fight your way out of a corner, without even needing to throw a punch." He told her.

      "Why? You just destroy." Lily spat.

      "Well, why stay on a side, where they don't even believe you half the time. Here, you could have friends, family, and followers. On the side your on, you have to control your powers, or things become chaos. With me, you could let them roam, unbound, unchecked, and free." He replied.

      "I have friends," she said.

      "Friends who don't believe you when you say something's wrong?"

      "I can sort of see why you want me, but why J-, why Jaooo- why Jaoame-, him?" she asked while nodding her head towards James.

      Voldemort chuckled. "There's a prophecy about you, you know. It says that you will marry an heir. You will have a child that will be able to defeat me. If I can get you on this side, you can't defeat me, and I won't take the chance of you being able to," he said. "Get up."

      James had loosened up the bonds so it would make an easy getaway.

      "I highly doubt I will marry Pothead. You also just basically told me that you wanted me for reasons of your own, not for me. Let me tell you this." She said while smiling. "You can't break me. I won't let you."

      Lily dropped the ropes at the same time as James, and they took off.

      "KILL THE POTTER. I WANT THE GIRL BACK TO ME ALIVE," Voldemort shouted.

"Why?" James panted.

"I'll explain later," she told him shortly. They had run into a forest with a few of Voldemort's inner circle following close behind.

      "CHANGE. NOW!" Lily ordered. James focused, and soon became a white stag.

      Lily ran ahead. She jumped towards James as he ran past her. Lily grabbed his neck and swung around so she rode on his back.

      "Turn right," she ordered. He obeyed.

      They ran fast; in and out of trees, as though a ghost.

      "Faster," she whispered into James's ear. He ran, and then tripped over a raised branch. There was a resounding crack, and James fell forward. 

     Lily was thrown from James's back and onto the ground. James transformed back into a human, and clutched his arm. 

      This time Lily transformed into a Bengal tiger. James crawled onto her back and Lily took off. She ran, faster and faster. 

      "THERE SHE IS," a death eater shouted from behind. Lily rolled her eyes. She turned sharply left, and soon saw a little cave with a rock in front it. _'We're on Hogwarts grounds.'_ She realized. _'They can't get us here,'_

      Lily ran quickly into the cave. She brought the huge boulder in front of the entrance.

      Lily changed back and looked at James's arm. He clutched his right forearm in pain to his chest. "Come here, I'll fix it," she said while lighting a fire. She moved the rock so the smoke could get out.

      He moved closer to her. James held out his broken arm. She pulled back his sleeve gently, and brushed the bruising place. It sent shivers down his spine, and tingles up his arm.

      "I need to set it, so you'll feel some pain," she told him. She grabbed his wrist, and pulled. He gasped and whimpered.

      "The worst is over," she said.

      Lily put her hand on his skin, and the bone started healing.

      James watched in amazement at how gentle she acted. When she was around her friends, and other people, she acted tough, but when she finally got alone, or with just one person, she acted gentle, caring. Her knuckles were just as bruised as his, from punching the death eater in the face, but she moved them so gracefully and softly. _'Her hands are warm,'_

"There," she said._ 'His arm is so smooth, comfortable, and safe. Wait, why am I thinking this?' She thought._

      "You didn't answer my question earlier," he said.

      "Voldemort wants me on his side, because of these curses I have." She told him bitterly, slamming her fist into her open palm.

      "How long do you think we'll stay here?" he asked her.

      "Probably over night. Do you want to take a chance with those boneheads?" she added jokingly.

      "I see your point," he laughed. James yawned.

      "Go ahead and sleep," she said to him.

      "But what about you?" he questioned.

      "I'm going to stay up for a while," she replied.

      "Okay, night," he told her. He lay down on the hard floor. 

      James dozed in and out of consciousness, due to the hard floor. He faintly heard Lily shuffling around, and it sort of comforted him to know she was there, protected.  

      Lily got him up after a while. "Can you walk?" She asked him.

      "Yeah," he replied.

      "Come on," she said.

      They walked out of the forest with surprisingly no hassles. They immediately went towards Dumbledore's office; however, He met them halfway there. "Follow me," Dumbledore ordered. He led them to a deserted classroom on the fifth floor.

      "I need to make an apology to Miss Evans first. I fully regret not taking you seriously. You knew something was going to happen, you tried to stop it, and we didn't believe you," he apologized.

      "Learn from the past to make sure it doesn't happen to another," Lily told him. He nodded his head.

      "And I wish to know what happened to the two of you after the attack. Why did you not come back to the castle?" he inquired.

      "When you're knocked out and taken by ol' Voldey, it's kind of hard to be punctual," James snapped.

      "What did he want?" he asked sharply.

      "The usual, you know, join me or die thing," Lily said.

      "Oh," was Dumbledore's reply. "We have some of our more advanced students out in Hogsmeade, trying to find survivors, so if you wanted to, which I completely understand if you don't, but, they're short a few hands."

      "I want to help," Lily said quickly.

      "Me too," James added.

      "Are you sure?" Dumbledore asked.

      "Yeah," they chorused.

      "Head down to the three broomsticks, the supervisor will give you instructions," Dumbledore told them.

      They left the castle and headed down to the three broomsticks. "Who is the supervisor?" James asked Madame Rosmerta.

      "Jon Reyford," she said. "Over there."

      The two walked over to Jon. "What do you want us to do?" James asked.

      "New recruits? Well, I want you two to sort out the dead from the living. The bodies are out on the main street. You find a live one, you signal a healer, then move on; got it?" He said.

      "Like a fly on poo," Lily answered.

      Lily had been working for hours, 3 to be exact, and she kept finding pieces of glass. She didn't know why she never threw them out, something just told her not to.

      "How many have you found?" James called to her.

      "Dead, 24, living, 40," She called back.

      Lily checked a child's pulse. Dead. '_That's the kid I got earlier,' "DAMN!" She said out loud._

      "Watch your language," someone said to her.

      "YOU MAKE ME. THERE IS A KID, NO OLDER THAN FOUR, LAYING DEAD ON THE STREET, AND YOU'RE TELLIN' ME TO WATCH MY LANGUAGE," Lily yelled.

      "Evans," James said softly while putting his hand, comfortingly, on her back. She just shrugged out of his grip.

      "We got work to do," she told him shortly.

      He nodded and got back to work.

      A few minutes later, Lily found another large piece of glass with some writing on it. 'Write our hatred' was what it said.

      "Hmmm," she said.

      "Hey, Potter, Evans," Jon called to them.

      "What," they asked.

      "Look, you've been at it for six hours, and I'm sending all Hogwarts students back to the school to get some rest. Your friends are already there, so just get some shut eye," Jon said.

      "I'm fine, really," Lily said.

      "No, you worked harder than any other, I want you two to rest," Jon ordered.

      "Fine, come on Evans," James said. Lily allowed herself to be steered back to the castle. There, in the deserted common room, sat their friends. Brittney, for the first time, looked terrified.

      Sirius had his arms wrapped around Brittney in a protective way. Brittney lay against Sirius; her head lying on the crook between his shoulder and neck.

       Logan had fallen asleep with her head resting on Remus's chest, and Remus with his back against the corner of the seat, and his chin, resting on Logan's head.

      Kobe had fallen asleep with Theodore Wood, her boyfriend of one month. She sighed and turned over, curling against Theodore.

      "Go get in the shower," she whispered.

      "Are you?" he asked.

      "Yeah," she answered.

      They went to the prefects bathroom and got into the shower stalls.

     "Ah, crap, that's gonna hurt in the moringn," James said.

      "You'll be fine," Lily said to him. "What hurts?" she asked from two shower stalls behind him.

      "Shoulder," he replied.

      "Sleep on the opposite side, so you don't put pressure on it," she told him.

      They got out of the showers and got into their flannel pajamas.

      "Where hurts most?" James asked out fo nowhere.

      "Back," she replied simply.

      "Oh."

      "Password?" the Fat Lady asked.

      "Fruggle wumper," Lily said monotonously.

      "You should sleep," James told her.

      "I will when I'm tired," she said.

      James lay on the couch, spreading all 6'3'' of him out, covered himself in a blanket, and went to sleep.

      Lily meanwhile, went to the table. She dumped the glass shards onto the surface. "Just a sharp jig saw puzzle," she reminded.

      An hour later, she had managed to get at least half the puzzle together. Another half an hour later, she got the entire thing finished, cutting her hands in the process. What it read, was another puzzle in itself…

You thought I'd leave you there eh, I just hate cliffhangers, so I swear I'll not do that.

      "Huh," she pondered. The message read: 

      _Mudbloods__ watch out_

_      You've nowhere to hide_

_      We shall hunt you down_

_      Till every mudblood dies_

_      Our greatest triumph of all_

_      Will happen on the twelve_

_      We shall write our hatred_

_      On all of __England__'s surface_

_      If you can figure this out_

_      You may save a life_

_      But saving someone_

_      Can cost a terrible price_

"Oh my God," she whispered. "Its not a puzzle, it's a riddle."

      "What?" James asked. Lily jumped. "Sorry," he said sheepishly.

      "It's this, riddle." She said.

      "Give it to Dumbledore," James said quickly.

      "No, its all all there, you just need to look at it the way they wouldn't expect you to do," she said flatly.

      "So what do you plan to do?" james inquired.

      Lily looked at him. "Solve it,"

      I want to thank everyone who reviewed:

      Stilts

      J.E.A.R.Potter

      Firehottie

      Padfoots-angelover

      Confused in life

      Mayumi-8805

      Mackenzie

      Lil Miss Magic

      Shree

      Zombiegurl98

      Fireangelfarey

      THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH

* * *


	13. Quidditch tryouts

            "I still say you should go to Dumbledore," James told her quietly. Lily looked in his eyes and saw he wasn't kidding.

      "I'll tell him in the morning," She said.

      "Okay," he replied. "Now lemme help."

      "Why?" she asked.__

      "Because my family could be where he's going to attack next," he replied

      "Okay, let's see how your riddle skills are. Let's say you're the driver of a bus. The bus crashes, killing all the passengers. Who's the driver?" She asked.

      "Ummm...." He thought. One minute. Two minutes. Three minutes. Six minutes. "It-I am!" he said.

      "Not very well, but I can teach you," she said jokingly. They got to work.

      "What's the difference between a riddle and a puzzle?" he asked after a while.

      "A puzzle's pieces are hidden in different areas, so you have to find them out. With a riddle, the pieces are all laid out for you, no looking for them necessary. You just need to figure out what the pieces mean," she said to him.

      "Oh," was his reply. "It's already four in the morning. We need to sleep. Classes start at 8:15, and I hear McCgonagall is planning to start us with transfiguring things into furniture."

      "You're still a whiz at that, why worry?" Lily asked.

      "If I get another 'A' on my transfiguring, I get grounded by my folks," he said.

      "You always get 'O's on your transfiguring don't you," Lily inquired.

      "I got an 'A' last week, if I get another, well I already told you." Lily noticed he was elbow to elbow with her suddenly. Their faces were less than two feet apart; he was looking her directly in the eye. A tapping on the windows brought them out of their staring contest.

      "Airz, you'll wake up the rest of the people," James hissed.

      "I'll get it," she told him. It was easier said than done. Lily had to lean across James's back to open the window, and along the way, she inhaled the air around him. _'He smells like evergreens; Outdoors-ish.'_ CLICK. Airz flew in the window as James closed it. 

      "Pugh," James said, Airz's feathers had tickled his nose.

      "Ticklish?" Lily questioned good-naturedly. James rolled his eyes. "You look like a chick when you do that."

      "Ha, ha, ha. What did Airz bring?" he asked.

      "A letter from my Aunt Faith," She replied. "She said that we have some tickets to Hawaii for my birthday, and that I've got some guests staying for a part of the summer."

      "When's your birthday? And how does she know all about the guests and Hawaii stuff?" James asked.

      "I was born on the Fourth of July. And I live with her," she told him.

      "Why don't you live with your parents?" James asked.

      "Because couldn't go to Hogwarts if I lived in America," she told him stiffly. James could tell she didn't like talking about that, so he dropped the subject.

      "Okay, I'll go to sleep," Lily gave in. He had been pestering her non-stop since the letter. 

      "Good, you suck in transfiguration anyways, imagine how you'll be with the amount of sleep you're going to get," James smirked.

      "Thank you for being so caring," Lily retorted sarcastically.

      "As long as you know I've got your best interests at heart," James replied while putting his hand over his heart and walking over to his original place on the couch. 

      Lily headed over to one of the chairs and curled up. Her hand gripped the cloth cover on the bottom of the seat, and buried her nose in her hand.

      "Do you want a blanket?" James asked.

      "I'll be okay," she replied.

      "G'night," James said.

      "Ditto," She said. James took off his glasses, put them on the coffee table, and went to sleep.

      Lily awoke to a first year boy, poking her in the side, rather hard and continuously. "Touch me again, and I swear to God I'll make sure there aren't any mini you's running in the future," She snarled. She tried to move her neck. "Crap, I got a kink in my neck," she complained. "Hey kid, who sent you to poke me?"

      "Sirius Black," the kid said meekly. Lily glared at Sirius.

      "BLACK! IF YOU DON'T RUN RIGHT NOW, I'LL SHOVE YOUR BALLS SO FAR UP INSIDE YOU; YOU COULDN'T FIND THEM AGAIN WITH A TELESCOPE!" Lily roared.

      "But in your tank and flannels?" Sirius asked innocently.

      "I wouldn't care if I was in a chicken suite, your ass is dead," She growled, but did look down and her attire; her black tank, and worn, black and red plaid pajama pants didn't work well when you were trying to hurt someone. Sirius took the hint and left as soon as possible.

      Lily pointed her finger at the riddle she and James had been working on last night. "_Reparo,_" She muttered. The intricate cracks sealed together until one piece of glass remained.

      "What's a comb?" James mumbled in his sleep.

      "You use it to keep your hair nice and TIDY," she whispered, but yelled directly in his ear on the last part. 

      "HAAAAAA," James yelled as he sat up right. He looked at Lily. "HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA," he yelled louder this time.

      "Shut up," Lily said while smacking him upside the head.

      "That hurt," James whined.

      "Toughen up. You're a man, I think," Lily put on a thoughtful face. "Don't you have quidditch practice today?"

      "Yes I do, no you can't join," he said.

      "I never said I wanted to-," she started.

      "Yeah you do," he retorted.

      "In the last minute?" she inquired.

      "Alright, never mind," he said.

      "Could I just watch?" she asked.

      "How about no," he told her flatly.

      "Please?"

      "What part of NO don't you understand?" he asked.

      "The whole thing?" Lily asked hopefully.

      "Come on, let's tell Dumbledore about this riddle," he said while getting up.

      "Fine," she said dissapointedly.

DUMBLEDORES OFFICE…

      "Where did you find this?" Dumbledore asked.

      "I found bits and pieces everywhere in Hogsmeade yesterday," Lily answered.

      "I have much to do in the ministry, with the current attack, would you two mind if I asked you to figure it out?" Dumbledore asked.

      "No," they said simultaneously.

      "Okay, now get to potions, I will give you a written excuse, seeing as they don't like Gryffindor too much," he chuckled.

      "Thank you sir," James said.

      "Off to class," Dumbledore waved them off.

      Potions were unbearably boring; as was history of magic, and charms. Lunch rolled around, but brought more bad news for Gryffindor. 

      Lily, who had been forced to sit next to James, heard McCgonagall whisper, "You need to find your team a new seeker. Mr. Maryland's grades are slipping dangerously low, and he needs to catch up. So I'm kicking him off the team to pick up his test scores."

      "What?" James whispered back. "Not now; not less than a week before the match." Don't you want us to win?"

      "Of course I do, but I want him to graduate _more. You have until the day before the match to find yourself a new seeker. If not, Gryffindor forfeits," she told him somberly before walking away._

      James turned back to his plate, but his eyes were transfixed on Sirius. "No, not now," he moaned.

      "What happened?" Remus asked.

      "Apparently, Maryland's become two IQ points higher than butter, and Potter here has to find himself another seeker before Saturday," Lily told them whilst clasping James on his shoulder.

      "Your screwed Potter," Kobe, Logan, and Brittney told him.

      "Thanks for that piece of information I don't already know. Why couldn't I just magically charm his brain to-hey? That ain't a bad idea," he said.

      "You give him temporary smarts, you get kicked out of school," Sirius said. "Even _I'm_ not that stupid."

      James got up, found the rest of the quidditch team, and led them into the hall. Lily of course, followed. She heard James re-tell the situation. "What should we do? Should we forfeit or should we get another team player?" he asked the team. "When is everyone free this week before Saturday?" he questioned.

      "I could substitute for Maryland," Lily said while stepping out of the shadows. "It'd save the team a bunch of time and effort."          "Friday is good for me," they all mumbled. 

      "So, how about before dinner?" James asked.

      "Sounds like we've got a time set; I'll see you guys then," Alex Johnson replied.

      James started to walk to Divination, when Lily whacked his shoulder. "Why won't you let me even try out. I'm just as good as you, maybe even better. Why can't you get it through your head that I just want to help the team," she said loudly.

      "Because a woman's place isn't on the quidditch field. It's in a safer area, preferably in the home, watching the kids," James retorted irritably.

      "Well unless I have some kids I don't know about, I'm still as good as one of the guys," she said. "Just give me a chance to prove it."

      "I'M NOT WILLING TO RISK LOSING THE BIGGEST GAME OF THE YEAR!" James yelled.

      "I'M WILLING TO RISK ANYTHING TO PROVE I'M RIGHT. TAKE A CHANCE FOR ONCE. YOU HAVEN'T WON A QUIDDITCH CUP IN 50 YEARS, JUST TRY IT!" she screamed.

      "No, I'm not going to risk it," he told her before stalking off. '_I like how she fights for what she believes in, she's got a mind of her own, and she looks really cute-huh?_' he thought.

      "I'll make you eat every one of those words," she whispered.

      After dinner, Lily and her friends walked with the marauders up to the common room. James and Lily still weren't talking, and it got on everyone's nerves. "Would you just talk formally?" Sirius asked.

      "How are you Mr. Potter? I trust things are good for you." Lily said, way too politely.

      "I'm jolly thank you. How about you? I hope things are headed in a good direction with you," James replied.

      "I TAKE IT BACK! FOR GOD SAKES, YELL AT EACH OTHER OR SCREAM AT EACH OTHER, JUST DON'T BE THAT POLITE TO EACH OTHER, IT'S UNNERVING; LIKE YOU'VE BEEN POSSESSED," Sirius yelled. 

      "Jack ass," Lily said.

      "Bitch," he muttered.

      "Well-," Lily started. "A bitch is a dog, a dog barks, bark is part of a tree, a tree is part of nature, nature's beautiful, so thanks for the compliment."

      "Smart ass," James snapped.

      "My ass maybe smart, but it's also beautiful. You see, unlike your school hoes, my ass has brains and beauty, not one or the other," Lily spat.

      "It shows," Remus said jokingly.

      "You couldn't even find your ass with a map and neon signs," James snarled.

      "How would you know? You've got your head shoved so far up your _own_ ass to see anything," Lily snapped.

      "Change of subject," Logan said loudly.

      "Alright…" Sirius started. He thought for a while. "Hey Kanaham's?" he asked.              "Yeah?" they replied.

      "What are your middle names?" he questioned.

      "I'm Kobe Lavonne," Kobe said.

      "And I'm Logan Kalcie," Logan finished.

      "What's yours?" Brittney asked Sirius. 

      "Sirius Ares, I hate that name," he said bitterly.

      "So you're the galactic Roman kid huh?" Logan asked.

      "That's so funny; I forgot to laugh,'' Sirius said sarcastically.

      "Well, at least you didn't get something like Tutunkamen from Egypt or Constantine or something," Kobe put in helpfully.

      "And it's still better than Leonardo," Lily told him. "The name sounds dorky, but it would probably suite someone like that seventh year Hufflepuff, oh, what's his name, Clockfart or something." 

      "No, it's Lockhart," Logan corrected. They settled themselves around the fire, still talking about middle names.

      "What's yours?" Logan asked James.

      "I hope it's not something like Heraldo," Lily said suddenly.

      "It's not," he told her shortly. "It's Aaron."

      "What's your guy's?" Sirius and Kobe asked Lily and Remus.

      "Leigh," Lily said.

      "Julius," Remus told them.

      "Oh," Sirius replied.

      "Wanna prank the Slytherins?" Kobe asked out of nowhere.

      "Hell yeah," James replied.

      "What do you wanna do?" Logan asked them.

      "Let's turn their robes pink, have writing on their backs that says "I'm a naughty person, and make them as round as a bubble boy" Brittney suggested.

      "And have the benches at their table collapse when they sit down," Lily added.

      "Oh and have their food raise up and hit them in the face when they try to eat it," Sirius said.

      "We gotta plan, let us put it into action," Remus ordered.

      "Alrighty then," James said.

      "Get the cloak," Remus told James.

      Three quarters of an hour later, the seven people had managed to get to the entrance to the Slytherin common room.

      "I'm so tired, I have been running on, like, three hours sleep for the past week, and, you know what, we _could_ have been here sooner, if Black hadn't got cold feet, and made us turn _all the way around… so he could get socks," Brittney complained blatantly._

      "Don't complain to me; _or_ hate the fact that I slept like a baby," he retorted.

      "Probably because you are one," Brittney muttered.

      "I needed something to keep me warm," Sirius whined, continuing as though he hadn't heard her. 

      "Suck it up, Black. You're well rested," Brittney said with a smile._ 'She's really pretty when she smiles, and pretty when she doesn't-Where the hell did that come from?' He asked himself._

      "Come on dunderhead," Logan told Sirius.

      "Pureblood," Sirius said with disgust on his face.

      "I always feel like I've got an appointment with death when I go here," Lily muttered.

      "What a cheerful place," Kobe said sarcastically.

      "Let's get to work," James said quietly. The seven pranksters trudged up to the boy's dorms, charming all the robes pink, getting the said writing on the back, and casting a timed swelling charm on them.

      "God that place reeks, I about lost all my hair. Who has the bad B.O?" James hissed.                

      "Sweet mother of Jesus, even our dorm isn't that bad," Remus

      "Do you know all the possible meanings to the term, even our dorm isn't that bad?" Lily asked him.

      "Don't you say a word," Sirius whispered dangerously.

      They then climbed, carefully, up the stairs to the girl's dorms. "At least there's a pleasant odor, can't say much for the cleanliness," Remus whispered, a look of revolt at the dank place.

      They set to work on the girl's robes, charming them pink, and putting on the said saying on the back, and setting the charm.

      "I have a whole new appreciation for the smell of roses," Logan said once they got back to the common room.

      "Even Wellington smells better than that place did," Sirius exclaimed. Brittney raised her eyebrow.

      "I shouldn't say anything, she is a loose person. I'm sure the male population of the school knows how she smells, along with her dorm mates," Brittney said while holding up her hands in surrender.

      "How do you know what she smells like? I thought you stayed as far from her as possible," Remus asked.

      "Six girls, one bathroom; you do the math," Lily answered.

      "Got it," Remus said.

      "I'm off to bed," Logan yawned.

      "Me too," Kobe added.

      "Me three," Lily said.

      "Shut the hell up, move your asses up those godforsaken stairs, and let me die on my bed. Shut up," Brittney said, putting a hand on Sirius's open mouth, which was obviously going to make a comment. Sirius licked her palm.

      "Eurgh, do you have any bleach, I need to disinfect my hand," Brittney said. She wiped her spit-inflected palm on Sirius's shirt.

      "Are you sure its not, that, _time of the month_?" James asked.

      "Oh go screw someone," Brittney snapped irritably.

      "At least I can," James retorted.

      "Potter, shut up before she punches you, I should know," Lily told him. 

      "Fine," James replied shortly.

      "Let's go Fang, the others are already in bed," Lily said while gripping Brittney's arm and dragging her up the stairs.

      "Time to get up," Logan said softly. It was Friday, the day of the quidditch try-outs.

      "I don't wanna," Brittney whined. Logan decided to go wake up her sister and Lily.

      "Lily," Logan started. "Quidditch try-outs are today."

      "I'm up," Lily told her instantly, sitting bolt, up-right on her bed. 

      "Good, now get dressed, and go wake up Brittney, you're the only one who can," Logan said to her with a smile.  

      Lily crept over to Brittney's bed silently. She lowered her voice, to about Sirius's pitch. "You were fantastic last night," She said, behind Brittney, quietly in her ear. Brittney's eyes opened with a start.

      "HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" Lily had to cover her ears to protect her hearing. "IT'S MY WORST NIGHTMARE, COME TRUE!!!!" Brittney yelled. She sat up-right so fast, you'd think she get whiplash. 

      Lily, Kobe, and Logan were all on the floor, tears coming out of the twin's eyes, and Lily clutching her stomach, rolling around. "That was not FUNNY!" Brittney said hotly.

      "Then why are we laughing?" Kobe wheezed before dissolving into another fit of laughter. Brittney huffed before stalking into the bathroom. She came out fifteen minutes later, towel drying her hair, and trying to brush her teeth at the same time. 

     "I got next," Logan called. She grabbed her tooth brush, toothpaste, towel, and ran into the bathroom.

      Lily opened her mouth to speak, but Brittney got talked quicker. "Don't you say a word," she growled.

      "Wasn't gonna. I was going to say, your shirts on backwards," Lily replied. It was true, her white school shirt buttons, were on her back, instead of her front. 

      "I knew that," she said sheepishly.

      "And I slept with Black," Kobe retorted sarcastically.      

      "Congratulations, he is like, one of the hottest people in school, other than James," Harriet Forayer sighed dreamily.

      "Do you think she's all skull, or just no brain?" Lily asked.

      "She makes you wonder," Kobe wondered quietly.

      "I seriously think that Hogwarts lowered their standards, or she would still be a first year," Brittney told them, once Coral Wellington and Harriet Forayer had left the dorm.

      An hour later, the C.Y. sat down across from the marauders. Three of the girls still laughed silently. The other flopped into her seat. Sirius and James were shamelessly snogging a girl in each of their laps. "Pardon me while I gag," Lily said with disgust.

      "That's nasty," Brittney added.

     "Are you sure it's not jealousy?" Kobe asked innocently. Brittney smacked her upside the head. "I'll shut up now."

      "Thank you for me not having to do it for you," Brittney replied. She rolled her eyes at the two. Lily and Brittney locked eyes, and simultaneously, kicked the two boys in the shins. They broke apart immediately

      "Bye Siri," the black head whispered.

      "I hope we meet again Jamie-pooh," the blonde said sadly.

      "Cut the sappy crap, we're trying to eat," Lily snapped. She picked at her hash browns slowly before taking a bite with her fork. The two girls rolled their eyes before stalking off to their respective tables. The twins chuckled silently.

      "Why are they laughing?" Remus asked.

      "We decided to wake her up by Lily pretending to be Black whispering, saying how good she was, _like that_. She woke up, talking about her worst nightmare being how she slept with Black," Kobe told him. 

      "It was dumb funny, but you had to be there to get the gist of it," Lily added.

      Charms, Divination, Herbology, and care of magical creatures, was, as usual, boring.

      "Come on," Lily whispered to the other C.Y. The marauders were busy with some Ravenclaws. They nodded and followed her to the girls' dorms.

      "We need to cut my hair," Lily told them all, as soon as they got into the bathroom.

      "We have an idea of what we want to do," Logan told her. "Just sit back and relax."

      An hour later, half an hour before try-outs, to be exact, the three girls finished working on Lily Evans, or, temporarily, Jordan Zelfa. 

      Lily's hair had been cut, so she had an army crew cut, her figure had become straighter, a lot less curves, due to magic. Her voice had dropped some, and became more Australian. "Am I going to stay like this?" She asked Logan.

      "No. It'll wear off after the try-outs. Your hair will have to be charmed back to normal though," She answered.

      "Okay, here goes nothing," She murmured.

      Lily ran through the entrance hall at top speed, which was fast. "Damn, I'm late," she muttered. She would have been there early, had not Filch come around the short cut she took.  

      Lily ran onto the quidditch field, just as James looked her way. He jogged over. "What are you doing here?" he asked suspiciously.

      "I'm a transfer from Australia. I heard you had a team player down, and wanted to see if I met your qualifications," she panted lightly.

      "What's your name?" he asked. _'Good, he bought it'_ she thought.

      "Jordan Zelfa," she replied.

      "Alright Zelfa, go stand next to Corner," he ordered. "Wait. How did you already know what house you're in?"

      _'Oh he's good, but I'm better' she thought. "I got sorted over Christmas. My family came here to see if they wanted me to go to Hogwarts," she replied._

      "Alright, carry on," he waved her off.

      "This is the procedure, I will call your name, you come over and we'll see how well you are with golf balls, and an actual snitch. The person who does the best, will be on the team, no exceptions will be made, and I will not, under no circumstances, change the player, got it?" he asked. They nodded.

      "Then let the games begin," he said.

      Player after player had been called, each one, with at least two sad faces on the participating members of the team. "Zelfa, Jordan," She heard James call. She shook her head when she realized it was her, in a way, he called.

      She gripped her broom, swung her leg over, and kicked off. It felt so good, to have the air whipping her face, and what was left of her hair.

      "ALRIGHT. WHEN I SAY GO, I'LL TOSS THESE GOLF BALLS UP IN THE AIR, WE SCORE ON HOW MANY YOU CATCH, WHEN WE'RE DONE WITH THAT, WE'LL TIME YOU ON HOW FAST YOU CAN FIND A REAL SNITCH. OKAY?" he yelled to her.

      She gave him the thumbs up. "Bring it on," she said to herself. 

      The first ball was tossed a hundred yards to her right; the next, fifty yards to her left, and so on. She caught all 40 golf balls.

      He showed her the snitch, she nodded. He let it go. "TIME STARTS WHEN YOU START FLYING, GOT IT?" he yelled.

      She nodded nervously. Lily closed her eyes. She breathed deeply, and her eyes flashed. _'Go right,' she thought. _

      Lily turned sharply, and flew. In the distance, she saw the glint of gold on the snitch. "Faster," she told her broom. The broom obeyed. She gained on the ball. Forty feet, twenty feet, five feet, six inches. Finally, she felt her fingers clasp around the cold ball. Lily skidded to a halt and held up her arm.

      James called her over. "Give the ball to me," he said. She handed it over. "Go wait on the end," he told her.

      "Okay," she said. Lily jogged over to the line again.

      James jogged over to the other five members of the team, to discuss who should be the new seeker. After what seemed like an eternity, James finally jogged back over. "For the highest amount of balls caught, Jordan Zelfa, missing none. The rest missed three or more. The fastest time, is again, Jordan Zelfa, making one minute, four seconds. Therefore, Jordan Zelfa is our new team seeker, We want to thank you for taking time out of your schedules to try out, and we want to thank you for the effort you put in," James said. "Once I hand this piece of paper to Madame Hooch, there will be no changes, under no circumstances." 

      James ran over to Madame Hooch, giving her the piece of paper that would signal the first girl ever, on a quidditch team. The rest of the people left, leaving only Lily and her team mates, Kobe, Logan, and Brittney. 

      Lily smirked evilly. "Thanks for not letting me quit the team Potter," she said.

      "I never said my name-" he said slowly. "Evans?" 

      "Yup," she replied. She got her original, figure, voice, and accent back. She muttered a charm and her hair grew slowly out to normal.

      "GET OFF THE QUIDDITCH FIELD EVANS!" he roared.

      "YEAH," the team chorused after him.

      "I'm still on the team," she told them before sauntering off the field with a smile on her face. James caught up with her.

      "No you're not," he said dangerously.

      "You said you wouldn't change players under no circumstances. Me being a girl is a circumstance; therefore, you can't kick me off," she told him.

      "I picked Jordan Zelfa, Not you," he retorted.

      "But good ole Jordan and I are, one and the same," she countered. "Look, you gave Madame Hooch the parchment, which now has my name on it. You take me out now, you forfeit the match. Tell me, are you willing to _risk it?" she asked, referring to the screaming match they had earlier that week._

      "Girls can't play," was his retort.

      "You can eat that rulebook for all I care, there's no rule whatsoever, saying a girl can't play, so there isn't any rules being broken," she said.

      "Fine, you're on the team, but we treat you like a guy, no exceptions, and if you lose, we never let another girl play quidditch," he told her. She rolled her eyes and started to walk away, but James gripped her arm, hard.

      "Do I make myself clear?" he growled deadly. He actually looked terrifying; his eyes were flashing and darkened to an almost brown, his jaw line clenched, making his face look square and his body stature, made it look like she was only five foot. His grip increased a lot with each second she didn't answer him. _'I know now why people like __Caldwell__, and he's one of the bravest kids in school, don't like to get him angry' she thought. Lily was temporarily reminded of someone she was more frightened of than Voldemort._

      "Crystal," she said, looking him square in the eye, her eyes flashing as well, her cheeks reddened, her fists clenched so hard, it made her palms hurt and, yanked her arm out of his grip.

      THE NEXT DAY…

      KNOCK, KNOCK, KNOCK. 

      "Stripes, go open the door," Brittney yawned before falling back to sleep.

      "Why don't you break that God damn door too?" She partly yelled to the perpetrator. Lily opened up the door. She held it open for a second, seeing James Potter standing there, quidditch robes and all. Her face was still blank, and she shut the door in his face. KNOCK. Just as she fell into her bed, he knocked again. 

      "What?" she snapped as she swung open the door again.

      "Quidditch practice," he said cheerfully. "We have the Quidditch cup happening in less than twelve hours."

      "No shit," she said slowly. "If we don't get enough sleep, we fall off our brooms and _lose the damn cup!" _she reasoned.

      "You agreed to being treated like a guy on the team," he countered.

      "I know I did, but it is 3:30 in the morning. For Gods sake it's still _dark!_" she said exasperatedly. "I can't even see the dang snitch, let alone catch it!"

      He looked at her with an eyebrow raised. "I can catch the ball," she quailed under his glare. He smirked. 

      "Prove it," he said simply.

      "Fine, give me five minutes, and I'll be somewhat awake," she told him.

      Ten minutes later, James, Lily, and the rest of the team were met by the Slytherins on the lawn.

      "Where do you think you're going?" James snarled at Morocco Flint, the Slytherins captain.

      "Quidditch practice," he replied.

      "Why?" Alex Johnson asked suspiciously.

      "Train our new seeker as well," he answered. From behind the troll-like Flint, came Lucius Malfoy. He stared at Lily, both menacingly, and wonderingly.

      "Can I _help you_?" she snarled.

      "No. Just wondering how low the Gryffindorks had to sink to put a mudblood like you on the team," he drawled coolly.

      "What? Didn't your mother teach you any manners when you were humpin' her?" she asked, faking surprise. There were pink patches forming on his cheeks.

      He stalked over to her, his hand raised, while the quidditch members watched in awe, and hatred. Malfoy swung his hand down, but Lily held up her arm in a block. She grabbed his wrist, and twisted. She then kneed him with all her strength (remember, special power) in his groin. 

      There was a thud, as Malfoy collapsed on the ground.

      "Aim your sights a little lower next time," she snarled.

      Kelso and Goyle picked the gasping Malfoy under his arms, and hoisted him up.

      "Damn it, I already booked the field!" James repeated angrily.

      "Show me written proof," Flint smirked. _'Not another screaming match, I've had enough in one week,'_ Lily thought.

      "Nice brooms," she said loudly, her face pointing towards the Slytherins, but her eyes never left James's face. "Where'd you get 'em?" 

      "As a gift from Lucius's father," Kelso replied smugly.

      "Yeah, you see, unlike some people," he glared at Zack Spinnet. "My family can actually afford the best there is."

      "Yeah, and unlike some people, you're an ass, so screw off," Lily said politely. 

      "Yeah, go annoy someone else," the rest of the team chorused.

      "OR," Lily started. The teams quieted their riot to hear her. "We could have a race, pick one person from each team, and have them race to Slytherin's middle hoop, first one there, gets the field for practice."

      "Yeah, let's do that instead, we'll show them the real power of the Slytherins," Crabbe slurred.

      "Who wants to go?" Lily asked once they huddled up. 

      "You dug yourself into this hole, you're gonna dig yourself out," Alex Johnson told her automatically.

      "Alright, that takes care of that, now who's got the fastest broom?" she questioned the team.

      "James," Remus said. Lily snatched James's broom from his, now relaxed, grip.

      "Alright, Lily's our racer, who's yours?" Remus inquired of the Slytherins.

      "Malfoy," Kelso said.

      "You run and jump on your broom, and to add to the excitement, I'll start from behind," Lily ordered. "_Colorifigus dos, red, green,"_

      "What'd you do?" Sirius asked.

      "Red for us, green for you, the team who touches first, is the only color that shows, got it," Lily told them.

      "Get on with it mudblood," Flint drawled. 

      "I'll do it when I'm damn good and ready," Lily retorted. She walked fifty yards behind the Gryffindor, turned, stopped, and yelled, "ONE, TWO, and THREE, GO!"

      Lily concentrated on putting James's broom in front of her, like the top bar on a set of uneven bars. The broom swung up, and stopped, about fifteen feet in front of her. She then brought her athletic ability into play. 

      Lily breathed deeply,heard the leaves rustling, opened her eyes, and ran as fast as she could.

      Lily jumped, and just managed to grab hold of the broom. Gaining momentum, she let go of the broom, with it trailing behind her.

      THUD. Lily's feet landed on the slightly dewy grass. She looked up with a smirk, and took off running. She landed right behind Malfoy, literally. She out ran him easily, and jumped on James's broom, with Malfoy in hot pursuit. 

      Malfoy turned left, sharply, trying to knock Lily off the broom. She rolled over, so he was now on her right side.

      He turned right sharply, but Lily leapt off of the broom, gliding down, but far. The broom handle slipped through her hand, she grabbed it, and rolled over so she was, again, upright, on it.

      Lily turned to her right sharply, and Malfoy didn't duck in time. He veered off course, just as Lily's hands grabbed the cool metal of the hoop. A big square of crimson appeared on the hoop, signaling that Gryffindor got the field for practice.

      She swung upward, twisted, flew, and landed on the grass, with both teams jaws open wide. She smiled.

      Malfoy walked over, his head hung in shame. "Now, take you, that stick shoved up your ass, and the orangoutanges you hang out with, off the pitch, I've got quidditch practice," Lily snarled. She turned to Alex. "I guess I dug myself out of the hole and made myself a mountain huh?" 

      The Slytherin team left, grouching and slouching as always. "Okay guys, let's have a scrimmage," James ordered arrogantly. "Johnson, shirt," He jolted his thumb in a direction towards his left.

      "How do you tell the difference between everyone if they're all wearing shirts?" Lily asked suspiciously.

      "Moony, shirt, Padfoot, skin," James continued, as if he hadn't heard her.

      "What's a skin?" Lily asked, her eyes showing apprehension. Lily looked over at Sirius, just as she found out what a skin was. _'No shirt?' She thought._

      "Wood, shirt, Spinnet, you're the ref for the game. Me, skin, and Evans," he looked at her, as he slipped out of the top half of his quidditch uniform. Lily looked around. There were three shirts, and two skins. "Skin." 

      The quidditch team whooped. "Unless you're too modest," James faked gasped, putting his hand over his heart. _'Nice body, I can't even deny that, yes I can!'_ Lily shook her head, and looked at his smirking mouth, forming one of her own.

      "Drop dead pimp," Lily drawled. She pulled off her shirt, leaving only her sports bra, and the lower half of her quidditch uniform. Her six-pack stomach, toned arms, back, and collar-bone area in were full sight, making all the guys drop jaws once again. This time, James had the wild and crazy thought. _'And I thought she was hot, with a shirt. I wonder what she feels, smells, and tastes like.' He thought. __'Why do I keep thinking these things?'_

      "Let's play," She said to the drooling, staring, jaw-dropped quidditch players. 

      "Shirts, huddle up, decide your positions, and captains," James instructed.

      Skins, same thing," he finished with a malicious smile a Lily. Sirius, James, and Lily huddled. 

      "Potter, Black, there's a thing called personal space," Lily said bluntly to the two people, less than half a foot from her. Her face remained blank, and her posture stayed rigidly straight.

      "Alright, Sirius, you're the keeper, Evans and I will be chasers, and Evans, you're the seeker too," James ordered.

      "Who died and made you captain?" Sirius asked sharply.

      "I'm self-appointed," James said proudly.

      "Quit flapping your lips and let's play quidditch," Lily cut in.

      Five minutes later, the quidditch team rose up, oblivious to the four new bodies in the stands.

      "Zack, we're ready!" Remus called. Zack let the snitch go, tossed up the quaffle up into the air, and sounded the whistled to signal that the match had started.

      Lily shot off on her broom, grabbing the quaffle as it started its decent. Seeing Remus veer over towards her, she twirled, sending Remus off course.

      Lily tossed the ball carelessly to James. She sped up, at a forty-five degree angle ahead of him. Alex guarded him heavily, so he was forced to throw the ball towards Lily

      She twisted her arm behind her back, grabbing the ball, twisted her arm back again, tossed the ball directly above her hand, hit the ball with her elbow, rolled, and kicked it into the goal.

      "TEN ZERO, SKINS," Zack yelled.

      Wood threw the quaffle to Alex. Lily flew parallel to him, until just before he was about to throw. 

      Lily snatched the ball from his hand, and flew back to the other side of the field. She turned up sharply. Suddenly, she stopped and threw it to James. He caught it, and threw it into the middle hoop.

      Lily looked, just as a bludger, sent by Remus, came her way. She ducked, and her hands grabbed the death cannon.

      She flew off her broom. Flying by Remus, she called out, "YOU JUST HAD TO SEND IT MY WAY DIDN'T YOU?"

      Remus stuck his tongue at her. She returned the favor. 

      The ball stopped, and started spinning rapidly. Lily was helpless, and she hated being helpless. Lily let go, and went flying. From twenty feet in the air, to fifty feet in the air, and falling rapidly; she grabbed the quaffle, but was still falling. Lily concentrated on bringing her broom to her.

      There was a whizzing sound, and her broom flew into her outstretched hand. Twisting back onto her broom, she tossed the quaffle to James, who caught it and threw it into the goal.

      Lily saw a snippet of gold and took off towards it, Sirius saw where she was going, and took off as well.

      Lily's hand grabbed the snitch, right as Sirius bumped into her. "OWEEEEEEEE!" Sirius fake whined.

      "Whaaaaaaaaaa," Lily called back. Lily held up her hand in the air. "I CAUGHT THE SNITCH!" she yelled to James.

      The team landed on the ground. "In your face Potter," She laughed evilly.

      "True, you have as much talent as any of us here, but, I have a problem," He started.

      "And I should care this early in the morning because?" Lily asked.

      "I called you a skin, what's with the piece of cloth around your, how shall I put this politely," he wondered, stroking his chin with his index finger and thumb.

      "I get the picture" Lily put in.

      "Alright, thank God I don't have to explain, now I said you were a skin, you have cloth above the waist, you agreed to the terms, I expect you to follow the rules as any other team member would" James said to her.

      "If you decided to sound like you weren't wasting my time and life, you could have said, take off the bra," Lily confirmed.

      "Could have said it better myself, but, you got the idea," James concluded.

      "I'll leave, I don't want to see my sister like that," Remus threw his hands up.

      "STRIPES!" Someone called behind her. Brittney jogged over to Lily, her volleyball hood flapping behind, along with her hair. The team didn't say anything, in fact, all their faces turned stoically towards Lily.

      "Why do they look like the Mafia?" Brittney asked. "And why are you out here in your skivvies? You didn't strip did you?"

      "Was about to be forced to," Lily replied simply. 

      Brittney's face remained blank. "Too much information, brain does not comprehend," She whimpered, putting her hands over her ears. Lily turned to her.

      "Scrimmage, me, skin, not skinless, want me topless, horny bastards," Lily told her.

     "Don't us to many words Tarzan," Brittney said bluntly. The team chuckled. 

      "You want another sight to see?" Sirius asked the team. The team again whooped. "Now, aren't they beauty's?" He called, putting on a Steve Irwin accent. The team rallied.

      "What do you have on under the shirt?" Lily whispered to Brittney.

      "White bra," Brittney replied.

      "Not for long," Lily contradicted. The team moved faster.

      "If we don't move, they might not see us," Brittney ventriloquized. The team moved even faster.

      "Maybe if we run our asses off and scream an Indian war cry, they might mistake us," Lily added sarcastically. "They've got a heat sensor. They know the female half of the species, and there are certain parts, they feel like experimenting with."

      "SCREW IT, JUST RUN FOR YOUR DIGNITY," Brittney yelled. A foot from the two was where the quidditch team was. 

      Lily and Brittney ran faster than they had ever run in their life.

      "Question. I thought it was 'run for your life', not dignity," Lily said to Brittney. Brittney took off her sweatshirt. "Got a bit warm," she told Lily. "BECAUSE IF THEY GOT THAT, UM, EXCITED, TO THE POINT WHERE THEY KILL YOU, THEY'D BE SENT TO AZKABAN."

      They ran out of the stadium. "How many do you think are able to swim?" Brittney asked, out of breath.

      "Other than Black and Potter and Remus, none," Lily replied. Lily and Brittney ran towards the lake, the rest of the team in tow. 

      The girls did graceful swan-dives into the lake. Brittney resurfaced, immediately attacked by Sirius. 

      Lily swam slightly down. She felt something grab at her waist. _'The arms and front are too smooth to be a grindylow. Potter.' She thought. Lily and James had that familiar tingling attack. Her back was now up against his chest, and they felt the others heartbeats speed up slightly. The two managed to break the surface. "I win," he murmured quietly into her ear. It made her back feel like a thousand needles were poking into it. _

      She wormed her way out of her grip. Swimming back to shore, she lost a shoe. "I liked that shoe too," she said disappointedly. 

      She got out of the lake to find that the team had left to either sleep, or try and sneak an early breakfast. Brittney crawled out as well. "Wet, white bra," she complained.

      "Would you rather be completely topless, or just be translucent topless?" Lily asked.

      "I'll go with number A Joe," Brittney retorted.

      "I go left, you go right," Lily ordered. Brittney nodded, gasping and clutching a stitch in her side.

      Lily ran in to the forbidden forest's edge. She backed up, and went into Animagus form. 

      James looked for her, and saw the one of a kind, jade green eyes. He moved towards the spot, when he was thrown to the ground. A growl reached his ears, but it morphed into a chuckle. 

      Lily placed a hand on his shoulder. Putting her mouth less than an inch from his ear, she whispered, "I win." Her warm breath gave him goosebumps all over, and the needle poking feeling in his back.

      She got up and walked to the dorms to get changed. James leaned against a tree, panting. It never ceased to amaze him about her. _'I think I might like her. And it scares me to death, she's so much the same; but so much different from the rest of the girls. She thinks for herself, she isn't clingy, she's smart, drop-dead gorgeous, funny, witty.'_

      He staggered into breakfast, barely eating, and he was considered the pig of the quidditch team. "Alright team, this is our first quidditch cup. We can do this. We are better, stronger, smarter, and handsomer. We will beat them," James gave his pep talk. "I hope," he mouthed to himself.


	14. Many major events

Lily twisted her hands nervously. "Oh, boy, oh boy, oh boy," she muttered continually. 

      "Oy, they've got the Minister of Magic out there, and the head of the department of magical games and sports, the school governors, and…Hey, that's the ref from the World Cup last summer, oh, what's his name? Bangladesh, that's it. I wonder why?" Theodore announced while looking out of the door.

      "It's probably because, this is the first game ever, that has a girl playing T.J.," Zack told Theodore. Lily breathed shallowly and unevenly now.

      "Feeling the heat Evans?" James taunted. 

      "No," she lied.

      "Fibber, you're hanging on to your sanity by the skin of your teeth," Sirius jumped in.

      "If I hear another word out of you Black, then you won't have to worry about my sanity anymore," Lily threatened.

      "You'll do fine Lils, I mean, think of this as the basketball tournament we won in fifth grade," Remus put in helpfully.

      "The major differences: we didn't have troll giants to compete with-" she started.

      "Did you even _see_ who we played against?" Remus asked incredulously.

       "We weren't on brooms-" Lily continued.

      "But you didn't mind trying to hit the referee over the head with one after the technical he called on you," Remus muttered. 

       "and we didn't have two black, leather, bowling balls flying a million miles an hour, trying to kill us-" Lily shot down.

      "You forgot about Jenson and Laters then?" Remus asked innocently.

      "Oh yeah, wonder what happened to them," Lily pondered.

      James looked at his watch, then the team, and said, "It's time." They walked onto the field.

      "Welcome to the Quidditch cup!" Carter Jordan called over the screaming audience. "FOR THE GRYFFINDOR TEAM, I GIVE YOU, STAR CHASER AND CAPTAIN JAMES POTTER, SIRIUS BLACK AND ALEX JOHNSON…BEATERS REMUS LUPIN AND ZACK SPINNET…KEEPER, THEODORE WOOD AND FINALLY, SEEKER…_LILY EVANS?"_ The stands erupted into whispers and gasps. 

      "Evans? But she's a girl, girls just don't play quidditch," a Hufflepuff whispered to his girlfriend.

      "_Have_ you got something against women playing sports?" she rounded on him.

      "No, no, no," he laughed nervously, twisting his hands. "It's just, no woman has ever played quidditch and it was a shock, that's all dear."

      "FOR THE SLYTHERIN TEAM, I GIVE YOU STAR CHASER, BENJAMIN KELSO, DANE CRABBE, AND RUDOLPHUS LESTRANGE; BEATERS ADAM NOTT, AND JARED GOYLE, KEEPER AND CAPTAIN, MORROCCO FLINT, AND SEEKER LUCIUS MALFOY.

      "NOW FOR OUR SPECIAL GUESTS, INTRODUCED BY HEADMASTER DUMBLEDORE," Carter finished with a look of confusion written on his face as he handed the stage over to Dumbledore.

     "WELCOME, TO THE ANNUAL QUIDDITCH CUP! I HAVE TO SAY; THAT THIS IS GOING TO BE A VERY INTERESTING GAME, IN MY OPINION; FOR THIS IS THE FIRST TIME THAT A GIRL HAS EVER PLAYED QUIDDITCH. I CALLED IN TO TELL MY GOOD FRIEND, AND MINISTER OF MAGIC, ELIJHA POTTER. HE TALKED TO MR. BANGLADESH ABOUT IT. THE IRAQI REF OWLED SOME OTHER FRIENDS OF HIS, AND BEFORE YOU KNEW IT, WE HAD A PARTY. 

      "NOW, MR. MOHAMMED BANGLADESH HAS KINDLY VOLUNTEERED TO BE THE REF FOR THIS GAME, SO CHEER LOUD FOR HIM AND YOUR TEAM," Dumbledore finished.

      Bangladesh walked to the middle of the pitch. The team formed a circle around him. "GET'EM LILY!" a voice screamed from the silent stands. Lily looked to the source of the noise. It was her Aunt Faith, dressed in pins, and a flag, bearing the Gryffindor colors, a lion in the middle of the flag, and a white lily plastered in the middle of the lion. 

      Lily straightened up with pride, she was so proud of her Aunt, for sticking with her through out everything, for showing a thousand percent support on everything Lily did, and vice versa. _'She's my mom'_ Lily thought. If Lily considered you family, or close friends, then you know she loved you, would stick with you, fight for you, and would kill for you. It was an honor, really.

      "I want a clean game from everyone, you play fair, and you end fair, capeesh?" Bangladesh ordered; a Middle-Eastern accent thick in his voice. He let the snitch go. It flew once around Malfoy; then flew around Lily. 

      Bangladesh sounded the whistle in the distance. Lily and Malfoy jumped up on their brooms simultaneously. "You know," he drawled as they rose up in the air, "I wish they would have selected someone, who at least wasn't a girl. I could probably stand to work with a mudblood, but not a mudblood girl. The Gryffindorks might as well surrender now, with the trash they have as a seeker." 

      Aunt Faith heard Malfoy taunting Lily. "You get 'em sweetie. You never took crap from Carl, you won't take crap from him, I know you won't," she muttered.

      Lily looked over at the circling slime bag. He was a foot from her. Lily raised her foot, and kicked him in the shin.

      "Ouch!" Malfoy yelled at her. She looked at his face innocently.

      "Muscle spasm," she said; a clueless look on her face. Lily looked down. She pulled into a dive. Malfoy caught onto her Wronski feint, thinking she had seen the snitch.

      Two feet from the ground, Lily pulled out of her extremely sharp dive. Malfoy wasn't as lucky; he had to skim the grass, so he wouldn't break his broom.

      "Hi, I'm Faith Evans, Lily's aunt; who are you?" Aunt Faith asked the three girls who just sat in front of her.

      "I'm Brittney Gabrielle Kaind," Brittney said cheerfully to Aunt Faith.

      "I'm Logan Kalcie Kanaham," Logan added.

      "And I'm Kobe Lavonne Kanaham," Kobe finished.

      "And we're Lily's best friends," they chorused proudly.

       "Shall we cheer Lily on?" Aunt Faith called.

      "We shall," Logan answered.

      "I like her, she's fun," Kobe whispered to the other two.

      "I agree, GO LILY!" Brittney whispered back, but screamed the "Go Lily" part. Brittney, Kobe, and Logan linked arms. "HI HO, HI HO, IT'S OFF TO PLAY SHE'LL GO. SHE'LL PLAY SO FAST SHE'LL KICK YOUR ASS, HI HO, HI HO, GO LILY GO!" they yelled boisterously.

      "We sound like cheerleaders," Logan yelled.

      "Don't tell Lily, she'll lecture you for an hour on why you shouldn't sound like a cheerleader," Brittney yelled back

      Lily stopped and turned. Malfoy, James, and the other members of the team had slowed down to see how the argument was going to turn out. 

     "If you wanna continue gawking like a fish out of water, go become an audience member, if you wanna play quidditch, put your eyes back in their sockets," Lily yelled.

      The players on the field shook their heads, and got back to an even more intense game than before.

      Lily took off again, with Malfoy flying at top speed on his broom below her. He pulled ahead about a hundred feet, before stopping and pulling a 90 degree angle turn, just barely missing Lily. 

      Lily noticed Malfoy less than two feet from him. Lily pulled the same kind of 90 degree angle turn.

      She stopped a few yards above him and thought hard about putting Malfoy on his back on his broom.

      Malfoy was temporarily lifted, then put in the said position.

      Lily flew down; the tip of her broom was directly above his heart. 

      Malfoy felt a whoosh across his face as Lily flew less than an inch above him. He could finally move, so he propped himself up on his hands.

      "IT LOOKS LIKE WEE MALFOY WET HIM SELF," Carter screamed into the microphone. Malfoy looked down. A large, warm, wet spot had appeared on his pants without his knowledge.

      "Would you like a diaper Malfoy?" Lily called from above. Malfoy's cheeks had turned the color of Lily's hair. He saw her smirk at him.

      Lily flew up, so she was the same height as the goal posts. She searched for a glint of gold. A whizzing sound came from below her. 

      Seven resounding cracks had filled the stadium as the bludger connected with its target. Lily clutched her stomach, while her broken leg dangled limply from her broom. Lily coughed; feeling and tasting the blood on her lips. She coughed again; the blood getting onto her robes. _'Great, internal bleeding at _the_ quidditch match of the year'_ she thought. 

      Lily looked at Malfoy. His eyes were transfixed on something twenty-five feet directly below her, or twenty-five feet across from him. She looked down; the snitch hovered there, equally distanced between her and Malfoy. 

      Lily completely forgot about her lungs or leg as she more or less dropped from the sky with her broom in tow. All sound disappeared except for her labored breathing and heart beat. 

      Just before Lily could grab the snitch, it flew off to Lily's left. She turned so sharp, that Malfoy had to slow down and go around. 

      They were soon neck and neck. "GIVE UP MUDBLOOD, YOU CAN'T BEAT ME, AND YOU NEVER WILL," he yelled. He bumped into her, sending her into a coughing fit, and knocking her slightly off course. She flew into Malfoy, knocking him off course as well. 

      Lily stretched out her hand. Malfoy knocked into her so hard, that she fell off her broom. Her hand grasped at anything that could help her regain her balance, but nothing could keep her up.

      Lily fell, landing hard on her back. The rest of the team and the Slytherins landed. The entire Gryffindor team looked at her with pity and anger written on their faces. Lily was actually scared of the look on James's face, and she never got scared of anything very easily. The Slytherins landed with smiles, yelling about how Gryffindor could win with a monkey better than they could win with Lily. Malfoy was high-fifing his whole team, glaring at Lily as well.

      "Hey Malfoy," Lily wheezed. 

      "What," he drawled.

      "You can't win the quidditch cup," she told him.

      "Why not," he asked sarcastically.

      "Because I have the snitch," she answered. Lily held up her left arm. The snitch glinted in the sunlight. The stands stopped, and upon seeing the snitch, three quarters of them erupted into cheers. 

      The cheering died shortly. "Now, now, move on through, I know just what will help her get back on her feet," an egotistical voice yelled. Out of the throng of students, came the seventh year Hufflepuff, Gilderoy Lockhart.

      "Move on through, I will heal that leg in to tip top shape in no time," he chuckled.

      "I want someone who actually knows what they're doing," Lily snapped.

      "Nonsense, I have trained under Madame Pomfrey's careful eye," he persisted.

      "Then Madame Pomfrey's gone stupid," Lily shot at him.

      "Just let the professional do his job," Lockhart said.

      Before Lily could protest or kick, Lockhart muttered, "_Brachium Immendo_."

      Lily's leg went limp. "Why, can't I move my leg you dumb ass?" Lily yelled. She coughed again.

      "That can happen," Lockhart defended.

      "Move, before I personally remove your leg bones and beat you over the head with them," she screamed. 

      Lily grabbed Remus's hand and pulled herself up.

      "Do you want some help?" Remus asked.

      "Nope, I'm good. I'll go up to the hospital wing where I can get some _real_ help," Lily said. 

      Since Lily was so close to the entrance, it wasn't much of a stretch to get onto the flowing lawn. "Evans?" McCgonagall called as Lily dragged herself across the grass.

      "Whatever it was, I didn't do it," Lily called back, getting into another coughing blood fit.

      "I don't even want to know right now," McCgonagall said. James had come from the utility room, looking like the world had just turned against him.

      "Potter, I want you to take Evans up to the hospital wing. I heard of Lockhart's attempt to heal your leg," she pointed at the piece of useless flesh.

      "I'm fine re-" Lily coughed even harder this time, sending a small stream of blood from her mouth. It was getting harder to breath.

      "She said she was fine," James snarled.

      "Why be rude to the person who not only won you the game, but the quidditch cup for the first time in fifty years," McCgonagall said with a smile. 

      James looked at the snitch, still clamped in Lily's hand. His cold demeanor dropped, and his eyes widened in shock, surprise, and pure happiness.

      "Now, I want her in the hospital wing immediately, she is seriously injured," McCgonagall ordered. She left.

      James jogged over to Lily. "I'm fine Potter, I don't need someone to hold my hand while I just get something that's probably nothing worse than a bleeding to-" Lily went into a worse coughing fit than before. 

      "Sure, and I are Zeus," He said facetiously, scooping her up in his arms. He had one arm under her knees, the other wrapped around her middle.

      "I'm fine damn it! I don't need a babysitter," she coughed. Lily hacked harder and harder, each time bringing up more and more blood. Her breath came in short gasps.

      "Relax, don't force yourself to breath so hard," James said gently.

      "You take a bludger to the gut and try not to force yourself to breath," Lily snapped. She grabbed the front of his robes tightly in her fist.

      "Why did you let Lockhart try and heal your leg?" James asked.

      "I didn't. That arrogant, dumb, ugly, psychotic, lowly, pig faced, rat tailed homo…wow, I just described you…" Lily said in awe. James's face contorted into a thank-you-so-much kind of look. "But any way, he figured that nothing more than a couple of hours practicing on a niffler, would make him qualified enough to heal a leg."

      James smirked. "Malfoy still didn't do his part of the bet," he said.

      "I'll get him later," Lily wheezed. _'She's muscled, but it doesn't show very much. Her figure looks almost the same as any other girl, but she's as strong as I am.' _James thought. His grip subconsciously tightened around her waist. Lily noticed it, but she decided not to ask.

      James knocked on the door to the hospital wing. "What is it? Oh dear," She exclaimed when she saw Lily coughing up blood. "Put her on the bed and take off her quidditch robes," she ordered.

      James lay her down on the bed closest to the window. He sat her up, unbuttoned her robes, and slid her arms out of the sleeves. Her sweater had little spots of blood all over the front from her mouth. 

      Lily's face had gone pale. James put her back down on the bed. "Budge over," Madame Pomfrey ordered.

      James shuffled to the other side of the bed. "How long should it take"? Lily groaned.

      "I can heal the ribs in a second, but the leg and lungs will take at least eighteen hours," she said grimly. The nurse walked off, scoffing about the dangers of quidditch.

      "How'd I do," Lily asked.

      "Better than I expected," James replied.

      "But not good enough?" She finished.

      "I didn't say that."

      "So I did well enough?"

      "I didn't say that either."

      "Am I ever going to get an answer out of you?" she questioned playfully.

      "You'll find out," he said mysteriously. Lily rolled her eyes.

      "Here we go, this is the strongest stuff I have, for your lungs, ribs, and leg," Madame Pomfrey said, coming over and holding a bottle of Skele-gro, and a bottle of Bleed-be-gone. 

     Madame Pomfrey poured the two potions into one glass. "Drink up," She ordered.

      Lily took a huge gulp and gagged before swallowing. "Good God, are you trying to get me to up-chuck my blood or what?" Lily hissed.

      "What did you expect, no potion but the tasting potion tastes good," Madame Pomfrey exclaimed. Lily showed a look of reasoning before plugging her nose and drinking the rest of the potion.

      "WHERE'S MY LILY!" Aunt Faith's voiced screeched shrilly. She burst into the door, looking around wildly.

      "Right here Aunt Faith," Lily semi-called. "What are you doing here?" she asked.

      "A man, looks just like the bloke next to you sent a _puce_ colored owl to the house, telling me that you were the first girl to play quidditch and asked if I wanted to watch. I replied with Airz, saying I would love to. He flooed me to the headmaster's fireplace, and I swear on Judah McCabe (SP?), that I will_ never_ floo any where again. By the way, what does Airz stand for again?" Aunt Faith said all this very quickly.

      "The man who owled is the minister of magic, thank you for watching, I appreciated it so much, your creator of Hanukah wouldn't like it if you swore, and Airz stands for Arizona; the naval ship that sank in Hawaii in 1941," Lily replied just as fast. 

      "Why is his owl puce?" Aunt Faith asked with a laugh.

      "Sirius did something that made him that way over the summer, and we haven't figured out the counter attack," James answered.

      "Ah. I'm Faith Evans, Lily's aunt," Aunt Faith told James, who both shook hands.

      "I'm James Potter, her classmate and friend," James replied.

      "Nice to meet someone so well mannered, _hint, hint_," Aunt Faith 'subtly' hinted towards Lily.

      "Hey it wasn't my fault your last boyfriend challenged me to a pie eating contest," Lily exclaimed.

      "He said you challenged him," Aunt Faith corrected.

      "What type of pie was it?" Kobe asked. She, Brittney, Sirius, Remus and Logan had come to the side of the bed while Aunt Faith had been explaining everything to Lily.

      "I dunno, tasted like blueberry, but looked like raspberry," Lily answered.

      "Oh well," Sirius shrugged. "At least it wasn't huckleberry fin."

      "Black…Huckleberry Finn was a character in a book, written by Mark Twain," Brittney said, with confusion and concern written on her face.

      "Tomato, Tomaato, either way, we're still talking about a berry," Sirius waved off.

      "Don't forget about kookaberry," Logan added sarcastically.

      "Or boys-in-berry," Sirius exclaimed.

      "Is he like this all the time?" Aunt Faith referred to Sirius, who had gotten an argument with Logan about all the berries they had ever heard of.

      "You caught him on a good day, when he hadn't inhaled the entire doughnut tray in thirty seconds, and drank an entire pot of coffee," Lily said frankly.

      "Or have six pounds of Honeydukes finest chocolate and other assorted magical candies in his system," James finished.

      "I'd hate to see him when he's extremely hyper," Aunt Faith said concernedtly. 

      "I give him an hour and a half, during the party before he goes bonkers," Brittney estimated.

      "I bet you ten galleons he goes nutters in forty-five minutes," Kobe wagered.

      "I'll raise the price to fifteen galleons that he begins his hyper weekend in twenty-two minutes, and thirty seconds," Logan challenged.

      "Deal," the three shook hands.

Madame Pomfrey walked back over to check on Lily. "I would like you to stay overnight, so if there is a problem, then I will be able to fix it quickly."

      "Please let me go, I'll stay on the couch, I won't move, please, it's the first quidditch cup we've won in half a century, let me go join the party," Lily pleaded frenetically. Madame Pomfrey looked at her, studying her for a few minutes.

      "Alright, but anything that feels even slightly different, you come straight back, pronto. And I want you here the second you wake up, so I can make sure everything healed correctly, got it?" she said with authority.

      "Like a fly on pooh," Lily replied with a smile. "Fang, get over here and help me back to the common room."

      "Yes master," Brittney bowed.

      "You know it," Lily smirked. Madame Pomfrey sauntered off, still scoffing about the dangers of quidditch and human pride.

      Lily threw her arm around Brittney's shoulders. She threw her other arm around Remus's shoulders. Hobbling out of the hospital wing, the seven students headed back to the common room. "Fruggle wumper," Sirius sang to the portrait.

      "Someone's in a chipper mood," the fat lady noted.

      "We won the quidditch cup!" Lily, Kobe Brittney, Remus, and James yelled.

      "Blow the paint against the grain why don't you?" the fat lady exclaimed.

      The seven walked into pure laughter, drinks, and entertainment, provided by a third year named Bill Weasley, and his first year brother, Charlie. "We'll just be leaving," James said swiftly.

      "We?" Sirius questioned. "You need to work on your math skills mate. That or you have a split personality, which I'm more inclined to believe."

      "No, because you and Moony are going to drag your lazy schmucks over to find more _friends_," James explained to him, as though speaking to a person who was one twig short of a broomstick.

      "Ahh, _friends_," Sirius exclaimed.

      "Yes, _friends_," Remus followed.

      "You _do_ realize that we can hear every word you're saying…right?" Logan asked concernedly. Sirius, James, and Remus shut up immediately and whirled around to face the four girls.

      "Y-yes," James stuttered with embarrassment.

      "Sure, and I'm God Almighty," Lily snorted.

      "You do a good impression of it," James snapped.

      "Takes one to know one," Lily replied snobbishly.

      "I'd be insulted if that made sense," James retorted before stalking off.

      "It did, your germ sized brain just couldn't understand it," Lily muttered under her breath.

      "I wonder if Black knows that there's a large mud spot on his bum," Logan whispered to Brittney.

      "He shouldn't…I just put it there," Brittney smirked. 

      "Nice," Kobe held out her hand. Brittney smacked it.

      "Move to the couch," Lily ordered playfully.

      "Alrighty," Logan saluted.

      Brittney, Kobe, and Logan carried Lily over to the couch in front of the fire. "Jeez, get a room," Logan shoved a provocative couple off the couch. The two huffed before finding another place to resume.

      James, Zack Spinnet, Alex Johnson, Sirius, Remus, and Theodore stepped onto the coffee table. "We have an announcement to make," James called. Most of the chattering died down. "First of all, lets have a round of cheering for winning the quidditch cup for the first time in half a century," He yelled charismatically. The common room erupted in its loudest rally yet.   

      _'He's really enthusiastic about stuff he loves, and he always seems cheerful when he's out in public; with a few exceptions. Am I starting to like him as more than I said I would?' _She thought, slightly panicked. In the time that she had been thinking, James had said all the hoop-la that he was, and got down to the real reason of his speech. 

      "We," James referred to the team. "Have a little present for Evans. Congratulations to her on making the permanent Quidditch position of Seeker on the Gryffindor team. We would also like to announce that Gryffindor house will let females, second year and above try out for spots on the team." He finished. The females clapped and yelled happily. 

      "Now; let's party like we're dieing tomorrow," Sirius started. The common room didn't need telling twice. The party resumed with more energy than before.

      One in the morning, was when McCgonagall came into the common room in her night cap, pink niffler slippers, and night gown. "Now really, I do think that most of you Gryffindors would have the sense to stop the man-made earthquake, but apparently not. You go to your dorms this instant," She ordered before leaving. 

      "Alright, you head upstairs and I'll be there in a minute," Lily said.

      "Are you trying to get in some last minute action," Logan joked.

      "No, I already did and now I'm going to meet the father of my baby," Lily answered sarcastically.

      "Can I be god mother?" Brittney went along cheerfully.

      "I hope you knew I was kidding," Lily said with concern.

      "No duh," Brittney replied, snickering.

      "Good," Lily muttered. Lily hobbled over to James. "Potter," she said.

      "What?" James replied, turning around.

      "Meet me in the library again at eight o' clock tomorrow," she told him.

      "Do we have to? We've been meeting for the past week to work on that bloody chunk of glass you found in Hogsmeade," he whined.

      "Yes," she said, exasperated.

      "Fine," James fake sighed.

      "Oy, Kaind, Kanaham's, get your arses over here," Sirius called.

      "I won't come unless you say my arse is nice," Brittney called back. Sirius pinched the skin between his eyes and sighed.

      "Just because the female population complains about how their arse isn't pretty, or to big, or too small, DOES not, repeat does NOT mean that the males of this world will immediately drop to their knees. We will NOT automatically start saying that the females arse is perfect. Men don't need to waste their bloody life, repeating something that only gives you temporary relief, I'm just saying, that if you hate your arse that much, then charm, shrink, expand and decorate your arse with little bunnies for all we care. You can tell your self-conscious, insecure, worried, always have to be perfect mind, the 'I have a nice flipping arse' phrase every morning when you get up," Sirius patriotically.

      "You could just say 'no'," Brittney muttered, walking over to the couch and plopping down. Her feet rested in Sirius's lap. He looked down at her feet as the others made themselves comfortable around the fire. "Are my feet that interesting," Brittney yawned.

      "Yuppies they are," he replied bubbly. They sat in silence for a while. "I heart sheep." Sirius said out of nowhere.

      "Congratulations," Logan replied.

      "But not just any sheep, pink fluffy sheep," Sirius continued. "Evans?" Sirius asked.

      "What," Lily replied from the chair she was sprawled out in.

      "Why don't you ever beat on people, for the stuff they do?"

      "Because I promised to not hit anyone unless they hit first," Lily growled. Her eyes trailed off.

     "Oh," he said. A few minutes of small chit chat went by.

      "Kobe?" It was Theodore, walking down the stairs clad in pinstriped pajamas.

      "Yeah T.J." Kobe answered. T.J. walked over to Kobe, picking her up and pulling her into a chair with him. Kobe immediately curled up into him. A look of content crossed her face.

      "Who knew these things could be so much fun," T.J. said while looking around innocently.

      "And we owe it all to Padfooty over here," Remus clasped Sirius on the shoulder.

      "Can I ask you guys something?" T.J. asked.

      "Shoot," James said.

      "What do the nicknames stand for?" 

      Prongs, Moony, and Padfoot all stumbled over words, trying to find a believable explanation.

      "Uh, it…it's um, Characteristics! Yes its characteristics. P-P-Prongs because Potter's hair resembles antlers; Padfoot, be-because, because he's silent when he walks, and Moony, because he, he, he l-l-lives around the moon," Lily stuttered quickly. Her eyes locked with James, Sirius, and Remus, telling them to go along with it.

      "Yeah," James said casually.

      "Oh, it makes sense now," T.J. said suspiciously.

      "Is anybody up for a few games of strip chess?" Sirius asked.

      "NO!" Lily and Brittney said loudly.

      "Are you chicken?" Remus asked cheekily.

      "I'm not!" Logan protested.

      "Alright, I'm white," Remus said.

      "Prepare to lose Lupin," Logan said gallantly.

      "Dream on woman," Remus shot back.

      "Just play the damn game," the rest yelled.

      The two grabbed a set left in the common room a few weeks ago. Forty-two and three quarters of a minute later, a stale mate had been called, with Logan wearing nothing but her personals, and Remus losing his quidditch robes.

      "I suck," Logan said bitterly at the end of the game.

      "There are many possible meanings to that sentence," Sirius said wisely.

      "And I'm going to bet that you automatically thought up the worst one," Brittney retorted.

      "Probably." 

      James got up and draped a blanket over the sleeping Kobe and T.J., Kobe shifted so her head was nuzzled in his chest, and T.J. tightened his grip around her shoulders.

      _'I wish I could fall asleep with Lily like that, huh? Oh yeah, I admitted that I like her…a lot' _he thought to himself, unaware that Lily had the same subconscious thought pass through her mind.

      The rest of the group settled down after nearly an hour of joking and playing. James, Sirius, and Remus lay down on various tables through out the common room. Brittney had sprawled out on the couch, with Logan at the other end. Lily had again decided to fall asleep on a chair. 

      She couldn't sleep. The piece of glass haunted her; it made her wonder where the next attack was going to be. "It's been almost two weeks, probably to wait for things to get back to semi normal before they send another dooms day.'We shall write our hatred on all of England's surface.' What the hell does that mean?" she asked herself out loud. Nearly another hour later, was when Lily finally dozed off.

      "HELLOOOOOOO, is anybody there? FOR THE LOVE OF THAT _HOT _CHICK MORIAN WARKKLE, WAKE UP!" Sirius screamed again, into Lily's ear.

      "BLACK, FOR GOD'S SAKE GO WAKE UP BRITTNEY, OR LOGAN! HAVE YOU LOST YOUR DAMN MIND?" Lily jumped, and started screaming at him.

      "They're already up, and I haven't lost my mind, I sold my mind to pay for my Honeydukes bill" he said quietly. Lily calmed down way too fast, and looked up at him with an evil grin on her face (for those who know me personally, think of how I grin at Travis when I'm pissed at him).

      "Black, what have I said about waking me up with loud screams?" she asked.

      "Err…I know this….oh yeah, not to," he finished lamely.

      "Now what did I say I'd do if you woke me up like you did the other morning?" she asked again.

      "That you'd rip my balls off and sell 'em back to me for a hundred galleons each," Sirius answered with a fearful look on his face.

      "Do you know what I'm going to have to do now?"

      "Take three deep breaths and count backwards from ten?" he asked hopefully. The rest had huddled in the couch to watch the show, and started to snicker.

      "No, two more guesses," she said with her eyes narrowing.

      "Alright, I-" he took off through the portrait hole.

      "You'll want your mother by the time I get done with you," she called as the portrait slammed. She walked over to a chair and plopped down.

      "Aren't you going to go after him?" Logan asked.

      "Nope, I'm going to go back to the dream where I was at a mental hospital, not being able to go to sleep because Sir Weirdo has made me become terrified that he'll wake me up," she yawned.

      "Ah…and I thought it was going to be something stupid," Kobe said cheerfully.

      "Cram it; you're not deaf in one ear and about ready to whack off your other because you don't want to hear Black screechin' like a banshee. I mean jeez, when did I put out an add for a new alarm clock," she snapped.

      "Take a Midol," Remus said.

      "Oh pooh on you," she stuck her tongue out at him.

      "Very mature," he pretended to scold her.

      "I do try," she replied casually.

      "As long as you make an effort Mr. Evans," James said nonchalantly.

      "Why did you call me Mr. Evans?" Lily asked.

      "Because talking to you is like talking to a guy," he replied.

      "That just shows how far your masculinity goes Potty," she retorted.

      "Ha, ha, ha," he fake smiled.

(FOR THOSE WHO HATE FLUFFY SMOOCHERS, THIS IS THE BARRIER THAT WILL SEPARATE THIS FROM THE REST OF THE STORY, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED STILTS. P.S…there will be little fluff parts further on, not bad though, but I'll warn you beforehand, and put a barrier between them and the action part of the story)

      Eight 'o clock was one of the few times that you would find James Potter and Lily Evans in the library together, looking something up.

      James had been feeling more intrigued by Lily as he sat across from her while they looked for the solution to the riddle. The way she wrote, how she would scrunch her face when frustrated or confused, the way she'd pull her lips to the side when concentrating. He had a feeling that if he didn't leave now, he might do something he would regret.

      Lily had been having the same exact feeling, of intrigue and wanting as James. She noticed that he would ruffle his hair and raise one eyebrow when confused; he would scratch his ear and crack his knuckles when frustrated, and take a deep breath, then exhale through out his nose when he finally got tired. 

      "Err, I'm going to go get _fantastic beasts and where to find them_," James got up hurriedly and held up the book before walking off quickly.

      "Okay," Lily looked at the book. Lily got up and searched the library for James.

      James was hiding in a corner, with his back leaning against the case for support. "Potter?" James looked up. Lily stood in front of him in the dim library with a book in her hands. "There are three problems with the book you said we needed. One: why would you need_ Fantastic Beasts and where to find them_ if we're looking for a clue as to where Holy warts is going to attack next. Two: you held up the book you went to look for, and three: you're in the section for what to do when your toilet clogs," she told him frankly. James turned and looked at the section he was leaning against, then at Lily.

      "I got lost," James gave a lopsided grin.

     They both noticed how close they were, less than a foot. Lily slightly tilted her head and started to lean forward, putting a hand on one side of his face. Slowly, she inched her head towards James before lightly kissing him on the lips. James got over his momentary shock and started to kiss back-hard. He slipped his arms around her waist and pushed her against the opposite book case. One of James's arms left its original spot from around Lily. He placed his forearm near Lily's head. 

      That's how it went, (I couldn't bear to write anymore) until Lily's mind started to work. _'Hmm, I could do this all day, I like how fully happy I am. I feel good…too good. What am I doing? Think about what happened when Aunt Faith kissed Carl. Think about what happened all those times before that._

(END OF ACTUAL SMOOCHER, NOW THE AFTERMATH)

Lily pulled away with a sharp intake of breath. She met James's eyes.

      James saw something in her eyes that he never saw before. Fear, pure fear, and pain were filled in those abysses of green.

      "I have to go," she breathed, not looking him in the face, but instead, his shoulder. 

      Before he could ask why, Lily had pretty much run from the library, leaving behind her jacket, and books.

      Lily ran out of the library, down the endless flights of steps, and finally onto the grass. She tried to clear her mind of what happened five minutes ago, and breathed deeply.

      "Well, well, well, what's the mudblood doing out so late," Lucius Malfoy drawled from behind her.

      "Screw off Malfoy," Lily said quietly. Malfoy looked at Snape, who looked like he was out here against his will.

      "Do you want to know why the mudblood never went home for holidays?" Malfoy asked.

      "No," Snape said shortly. He looked away.

      "It's because her parents finally figured out what a disgrace she is and won't let her back in her house," Malfoy said loudly.

      Lily had stopped with her back to the two of them, but didn't turn around. Her fists were clenched so hard, her palms bled and cramped. It wasn't the fact of what he said, he insulted her daily, what made her stop, was how he guessed so close. Her jaw clenched. "I said stop."

      Malfoy walked behind her, stopping with his chin past her shoulder and next to her ear. "What a disgrace," he whispered. Lily turned impossibly fast, and punched Malfoy square in the nose. He fell to the ground and soon was kicked in the stomach by Lily. He rolled over, so he was on his knees in the guarded position. 

      It seemed as though a delayed image flashed through Lily's mind when she raised her foot to hurt him again. She saw every thing. Lily forgot about the words Malfoy had said, and ran to her dorm; oblivious to the soul that had witnessed the whole thing from the library.

      She shut the door quietly before sliding down and taking deep breaths. "I can't tell anyone about this, no one," she swore to herself.

      Lily woke up the next morning with a terrible migraine. Then she remembered why. "God, please don't have him tell anyone," she pleaded. She got out of bed, showered, and headed down the halls to breakfast. "Evans?" Flitwick called from his class room. 

      "Yeah professor?" she asked.

      "I was ordered by Headmaster Dumbledore to take you and Mr. Potter to his office, so, at least I won't be looking for two people," he squeaked, breathing a sigh of relief on the last part.

      "Sure, but Potter is probably down at breakfast, I can get him for you if you want," she offered.

      "Oh, no thank you, these old bones of mine need exercise," he laughed.

      "Okay then," she followed him to the Great Hall, and had a confused look on why Dumbledore would need Potter and her together.

      James jogged over to them from the Gryffindor table, avoiding Lily's eyes also, she couldn't really blame him; the kiss had only happened last night.

      They followed Flitwick to the Gargoyle that hid Dumbledore's office from the rest of the castle.

      "What did we do this time?" James asked Flitwick.

      "I do not know Mr. Potter," was his reply. "Skittles," Flitwick said, and the gargoyle opened to reveal a spiral staircase. "I'll leave you to it then."

      James followed Lily up the staircase, and heard her knock on the door to Dumbledore's office. "Come in," came the reply.

      "That's Dad," James realized. Lily blinked. They walked in. Dumbledore sat with his fingers laced around a letter. James's Dad was leaning against a book case; his face was grim.

      Dumbledore beckoned Lily over to his desk. She complied. He handed her the open letter, it was addressed to her. She opened the flap and pulled out the letter.

      _Dear Ms. Lily Evans,_

_Due to unfortunate attacks; we have to leave you the burden of losing a loved one. Ms. Faith E. Evans died on the night of June 1st, at seven o four; due to a mass murder by the Dark Lord. A note was left in her hand. It is enclosed in this envelope._

_                  Our condolences,_

_                        Martha Wonderwork._

_                              Department of magical law enforcement_

Lily gripped the paper so hard, that her fingers cramped, and her cuts from last night reopened, larger. She took several unsteady breaths and blinked several times.  
      "Why didn't you let me read this on my own?" Lily asked Dumbledore. James wondered what they were talking about.

      "We didn't want you to do anything irrational," he answered quietly.

      "Oh so I'm just gonna go blow up things huh?" she asked, her eyes met his, and he saw pure pain, and hatred.

      "That's not what I meant-" 

      "No, I know what you meant," she finished. Lily turned and walked towards the door in a dangerously calm state, though inside she was crumbling. Dumbledore blocked her way to the door. She stopped. "Move," she growled deadly. Her eyes would scare you too, literally.

      "No."

      "Then I will," she backed up a few steps, and ran, gaining speed and power.

      "I'll stop her," Elijah Potter said bravely.  

      "Dad, she won't stop because you charm something, she plays by her own rules," James called. Never the less, Elijah tried.

      Lily raced the charm, and threw her weight into her shoulder, which hit he door with enough force to knock over a cart horse. The door busted open. Lily ran, faster and faster, faster than she had ever run in her life. She heard the calls of Dumbledore and James's dad.

      Lily ran down to the Slytherin common room. "Mudblood," she hissed. The painting moved. Lily headed in, and spotted Malfoy. She picked him up by the throat, and slammed him into the wall. Lily put her face close to his.

      "I know you're a God damn death eater, so don't pull the bull. But I want you to give Voldemort this message from me. Tell him that I'll make sure he dies, whether it's me or my descendants, if it means I have do die in the process, I'll do it. I'll do almost anything to get him to die," she snarled quickly, and dangerously. Lily backed off. "Tell him…tell him I promise he'll die, and I always keep my promises." 

      With that, she left the common room in a dead silence. Lily ran up a few floors, near the entrance doors, where she slid down the wall, and leaned her head against it. She could hear the Great hall chattering happily. _'She's gone. I don't know which is worse, the initial shock, or that little fact, that she isn't going to pop out and say it's some joke.'_

      On the outside, people saw a tough, stubborn, warrior; perfect for battle, but still a nice person to those she cared for. But on the inside, she was on the verge of tears. 

      Lily's world had finally cracked. And she was watching every…piece…fall.

      Hi, sorry it took me so long to update, I had to build up a lot of nerve to write that smoocher. Ewe. But any way, thank you to all those who reviewed, HINT HINT… I wanna see whach you think. So I can get a more of a base on what not to and too put in the story, and tell your friends about this, they could help me SOOO much. Again, REVIEW…and SPREAD THE WEALTH. 

      Until next time friends.


	15. The funeral

       Lily shook her head to rid it of the pain she felt. "She's gone," Lily told herself. Her lower lip wouldn't stop trembling. "And losing your cool about it won't bring her back." She got up.

      The Great Hall chattered like squirrels. (SQUIRLLY!!!) And Lily managed to get snippets of one conversation--"I know, my mom made me come here because she's a total cow, God I wish she would just back off of my life, she has her own," a brunette who looked about Lily's age said to her friend…in an American accent.

      "Well, at least you have a _real_ reason to be here at this crack house. My dad said that we're moving because he needed to _'get out of the country for a while_'," a guy, who looked as old as the two girls, said.

      "The only reason we moved, is because Adrian moved," the second brunette told the rest of them with a snobbish look on her face.

     "They look way too familiar," Lily noted. It bugged her.

      "Oy, Stripes…are you going to gawk all day, or are you going to judge this syrup chugging contest?" Brittney called over to Lily. The three familiar students lifted their heads. Something in Lily's mind clicked. _'Adrian Canings, Daniel Williams, Brooke Eagan, from __Muggle__School__. It really is a small world.'_ Lily thought.

      Lily's eyes never left the three, but she jogged over to the other end of the Gryffindor table. Brittney, Remus, Logan, and Sirius all glared at each other. "Did you know staring is impolite?" Lily asked sarcastically, but her eyes definitely didn't match her tone. The usual happiness, mischievousness, or sardonic glint had dimmed a lot, but no one noticed…Lily made sure of that.

      "Stripesey-poosems(he, he, he Stilts)…we have a quart of maple syrup, Prongs is timing Kaind, Kanaham two is timing Kanaham one; therefore, you have to time me and dear old Moony," Sirius instructed.

      "Yes master," Lily hissed, doing a hunchback, and swung one arm limply, like it had broken. "But I need to talk to Malfoy over at his throne for a sec," Lily said as an afterthought.

      _'I need to do something to get my mind off of everything… now'_ she told herself. Lily walked, clutching her neck where she had gotten her largest scar. "Oy dip-shit,"

      "Language-" Sprout intercepted automatically without looking up from her newspaper.

      "SORRY PROFESSOR…you need to do your part of the bet," Lily ordered.

      "Make me," He said simply.

      "If that's what it takes to get you off your fat ass and do it, then I will," Lily snapped angrily. Malfoy glared at her.

      "Screw you," Malfoy told her.

      "You wish, and anyways, that's Crabbe's job," she retorted. Her face looked cool, but her insides felt like lead. "You don't have any motivation; maybe I'll give you some."

      With that, she levitated the milk jug from the table with her mind, while her hands grabbed her wand. She dumped the milk on his head. And turned him pink, gave him a dress, a high, squeaky voice, and made him get up with her mind. She forced him to walk over to James. She grabbed Malfoy around the neck. "Ask, or you won't eat solid food for the rest of the month," she threatened. Malfoy gulped.

      "Say, I'm new to here, and I heard you knew the school very well, could you show me around," Malfoy squeaked. James, who had been timing Brittney and Sirius, didn't notice what had happened at the Slytherin table. James looked at Malfoy.

      _'Can we say sun burnt_?' James thought in surprise. "Uhhhh…Err…I guess." Sirius threw James a look; it gravely concerned James.

      James looked at Lily uncertainly; her face remained stoic however, and James led Malfoy from the Great Hall, oblivious to what he would soon discover. "What did you do?" Remus rounded on Lily.

      "Oh God, was that…Malfoy?" Logan asked incredulously. 

      "No, not yet, for now…he is Medusa." Lily replied evilly._ 'Aunt Faith used to talk like that around Halloween'_ Lily thought with a twinge of guilt and pain.

      "Now why didn't I think of that?" Sirius pondered thoughtfully.

      "I could give you about thirty different reasons," Brittney said airily.

      "I'm so hurt," Sirius said in mock sadness.

      "Cry us a bridge, build a river and get-wait a minute, that didn't come out right," Remus stated.

      "Nah, really, I never noticed." Kobe stated caustically. Remus gave her a pointed look.

      "Come on, let's go before Crackpot gets back, because believe me, it ain't going to be a pretty site," Lily told them. "I'd like to live-" she stopped short. A sudden reminder brought her guilt up to full capacity. "Let's go."

      The six of them walked into the rapidly clearing hall. Time seemed to slow down for Lily when she noticed the three transfers again. 

      Adrian, Brooke, and Daniel had been talking to Snape; asking him about what teachers should be avoided, the coolest classes, and the certain people to hate.

      "Hey, who's the redhead over there?" Adrian pointed to a group of six walking towards the entrance doors.

      "Her, oh she's another person not to get on the bad side of-" Snape told her.

      "That's not what she asked," Brooke interrupted.

      "I would have answered if you had let me finish," Snape turned on her in a sharp voice. She shrank back.

      "Her name's Lily Evans, but most Slytherins just call her Satin's granddaughter in a wig," Snape told them before removing himself from the group and stalking to the common room.

      Lily looked over just in time to make eye contact with Adrian. Adrian's face went slack, her eye's widened. Lily's eyes traveled to Brooke, and Brooke did the same thing as Adrian.

     Daniel looked her up and down with his jaw open wide, but shut it and replaced it with a sneer. "Well would you look at what the cat threw up; it's Evil Evans, the carrot from hell." Adrian and Brooke sniggered at the old name they had used for her.

      "Why don't you just go take care of your kids," Lily turned and drawled at him. His eyes narrowed. "Awe, is fickle Daniel getting his thong up in a bunch…maybe Canings can help you," Lily told him brightly.

      Remus looked at the three. "Leave her alone, don't get ticked off at the one person who did anything and everything better than you," He said quietly. Adrian's cold blue eyes became fixed on Remus; looking up and down at him, then at Sirius.

      As much as Sirius liked to be stared at, he didn't like being stared at by Brooke and Adrian, they were creepy. "Take a photo, it'll last longer."

      Adrian looked at him in shock. Just then, a loud roar erupted from somewhere in the dungeon.

      "Either Potter just found out what happened, or we have a dragon down below," Logan said uncertainly.

      "Gotta move, gotta move, gotta go real fast before…" Lily trailed off.

      "What?" Sirius asked as Adrian, Brooke, Daniel headed out into the quidditch pitch with the rest of the Gryffindors, Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs and a few Slytherin's to relax on the green grass.

      "EVANS, YOU BETTER NOT BE STANDING AT THE BASE OF THE STAIRS WHEN I GET THERE!" James roared from one floor down.

      Lily looked at Sirius. "I see mad people," she whispered in a frightened tone.  
The six left and headed out onto the quidditch pitch.

      "Well how did he know you were at the base of the stairs?" Brittney asked stupidly.

      "How the hell am I supposed to know?" Lily yelled more rudely than she meant to.

      "I was just asking," Brittney snapped.

      "Sorry, but I got Sir Stupid wanting to ring my neck, I'm in a hurry and I'm fleeing for my life," she lied. In truth, she got angry at herself because of her aunt.

The students headed out into the quidditch pitch. James wasn't far behind; he managed to catch a glimpse of Kobe's robe as the entrance doors shut behind the five.

      Lily, Brittney, Logan, Kobe, Sirius and Remus managed to get into the center of the pitch before James caught up with them. He was at the south end of the field, when he spotted Lily. "I know it was a joke, and that's why I won't hurt you, but I'm going to scare the living hell out of you," he said to himself.

      "EVANS, YOUR ARSE IS MINE!" he yelled. The whole throng of students turned to look at the commotion-err and the commotion-e. "TAG, I'M IT!" he called menacingly. The crowd moved toward the edges of the field. He took of in the direction of Lily.

      In the time that the five had stared at James's antics, Sirius had snuck over next to James. "I WANT TO PLAY TAG TOO. KAIND, RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN," he called to Brittney. Brittney and Lily watched as the other three backed off to see the action.

      "Shall we?" Brittney turned.

      "We shall," Lily replied. When James and Sirius were just barely within reaching distance of the two girls, Lily and Brittney ran faster than they had ever run before.

      James and Sirius managed to catch up to them, but then the other two would pull ahead. Brittney ended up doing a back flip over Sirius and running in the opposite direction. "NOW I'M ALL CONFUSED!"

      "IT'S NOT THAT HARD TO DO WITH YOU," Brittney yelled behind her shoulder. Sirius ran after her.

      James was just about to get Lily, when he said, "Why don't you some of that Kung Fu gymnastics?" he sneered.

      "Fine, I will," she retorted hotly. At the center goal post, she leapt and swung in a semi-circle. She let go and flew upward, then downward sharply. Lily landed on her feet in a crouched position before pushing off and sprinting around the pitch with James not far behind.

      As Lily sprinted into the center of the pitch, she caught up with Brittney. "Once again, sports have saved my life," bragged Brittney.

      Something on a broom stick grabbed her arm; Sirius. "And once again, your mouth ruined it."

      "Damn," cursed Brittney.

      Lily saw Snape's hunched shoulders turn in her direction. His eyes narrowed. "Wotcher," he snarled. She rolled her eyes, ran and jumped onto and off of his shoulders onto a broom she had brought with her thought. (That rhymes).

      Through Lily's peripheral vision, she managed to glimpse Brittney, Sirius and James all on broomsticks. They all headed for her.

      Lily's feet landed awkwardly on her broom. She noticed Adrian, Brooke and Daniel on the field with laughter on there faces. Stripes momentarily lost her balance before doing an instinctual motion. She did flips. Lily did flips over the three before landing her feet on the broomstick like a surf board. _'I should learn to do that in __Hawaii__ this summer'_ she mused. Guilt hit her full force again.

      Lily headed over to the Astronomy tower with James, Sirius and Brittney not far behind. Lily had flown over to the center of the lawns, in between Hagrid's and the castle. There, she decide to shock them a little and jumped off her broom. "WOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" she yelled. The whooshing through her hair was one of Lily's favorite sounds. Barely two feet from the ground, was the sound of a hand gripping wood heard. Lily had summoned the broom to her, and she landed the right way on her broom. "IS THAT ENOUGH KUNG FU GYMNASTICS FOR YOU POTTER?" Lily yelled. James looked at her in a mixture of shock and admiration.

      Lily slowed down to a stop. "Why didn't you teach us that move?" Logan asked impatiently.

      "Because I didn't know I could do it either," she laughed.

      "What a thing to do on the last day of school," they chorused.

      Lily hugged her four friends and Remus good-bye. She gave Sirius a pat on the shoulder. "No hug for me?" Asked Sirius.

      "No, I don't want to burn these clothes," she joked. Sirius threw his arms around her. Lily looked over at James's face and she could have sworn that she saw jealousy. He noticed her looking at him funny and changed his facial expression in a hurry. Lily threw him a suspicious look. "Black, Black I can't breathe. BLACK!" Sirius jumped and let go of her.

       The rest of them left with rides of their own. Lily was left to call a cab.

      Lily picked up the pay phone, dropped a few coins in, and dialed. "Yeah, can I get a cab at King's Cross Station please?" Lily said into the receiver.

       "Okay, one should be there shortly," the taxi service told her.

      "Thank you," Lily said as she hung up the phone.

      Lily headed out to the curb in front of the station. "I'll have to call Petunia to tell her, we should probably set the funeral in about a week, maybe we could do it at twelve…" she mused. Then the thought hit her. She opened her trunk, oblivious to the odd looks she got from passers by.

      "Gotcha," she stated triumphantly to no one in particular as she pulled out the piece of glass they found and the special edition of the _Daily Prophet_. "Airz, where are you?"

      A loud hoot from beside her answered her question. She looked at the piece of glass:

      _Mudbloods watch out_

_      You've nowhere to hide_

_      We shall hunt you down_

_      Till every mudblood dies_

_      Our greatest triumph of all_

_      Will happen on the twelve_

_      We shall write our hatred_

_      On all of __England__'s surface_

_      If you can figure this out_

_      You may save a life_

_      But saving someone_

_      Can cost a terrible price_

"Okay, what about this, "will happen on the twelve"…today's the tenth," She had a sudden idea. Lily pulled some parchment, a quill and ink over to her.

      _Dear Professor Dumbledore,_

_            Please visit my house in Portries Pie hole today, it's urgent._

_                        Lily Evans_

"Aunt Faith would have been happy to meet Dumbledore when she wasn't drunk…but it's my fault she won't get to, it's all my fault." Lily growled angrily. "Airz," she instructed as she tied the letter to his leg. "I need this in Dumbledore's hands before six o' clock or else…" she stopped. A hoot brought her back to reality. Airz seemed to be asking why it needed to be their so fast.

      "If it's not in his hands before six, you won't get any new treats for a while," she threatened. "Death Eaters will destroy your favorite pet place."

      Airz flapped his wings quickly. "Good. Now fly as fast as you can."

      Airz took off in the direction of Hogwarts. And Lily was left to carry her trunk and empty owl cage to the taxi.

      Lily grumbled the whole way up the drive way. "I can't believe I'm twenty bucks less in my pocket. Three miles shouldn't be twenty friggin' bucks," she complained.  

      She stopped abruptly when she got over to the door. "She's gone, she won't come back. So quit being a weak little brat, it's just a house," she berated herself. Her trembling hand slowly opened the door, and she got a rush. It felt almost like someone had been trying to hug her. Lily shut her eyes, and breathed deeply; trying not to break everything.

      "It's my fault; it's my fault, ITS MY OWN DAMN FAULT SHE'S NOT HERE. QUIT TRYING TO CRY…I HAVEN'T CRIED ONCE IN MY LIFE AND I'M NOT GOING TO START NOW!!!" Lily screamed. "I promise you, I promise you that raising me won't be a mistake, I'll prove to be the best for you…I promise I won't be the mistake that should-" Lily took a sharp breath intake. "I always keep my promise."

      Lily went upstairs, completely bypassing Aunt Faith's room; not even sparing a glance. She headed into her own room and dumped her trunk onto the floor with a loud THUNK. Her face showed no remorse, just anger. Her eyes had gone from a clear, jade green, to an almost black; they had never turned that way before, but she was never that angry either. Her entire body shook. Lily's fists had cramped and were now bleeding heavily and freely down her palms, but she paid no attention. Hate had enveloped her, almost suffocating her.

      A loud pop sounded from behind her. "Lily, you said you wanted me for something," Dumbledore's voice said quietly from behind her. Lily bent down to get the stuff back out of her trunk.

       "Look at the stuff…if you don't get it, tell me and I'll say what I think it means," Lily told him in a deadly calm voice. It actually frightened Dumbledore. Her voice showed no emotion but the purest hate and loathing. It seemed as though every breathe hurt, and Lily's jaw had clenched tightly.

      Dumbledore picked up the newspaper and the piece of glass. "I don't get it," he stated after a while. He noticed the blood smears along the back.

      I think the "will happen on the twelve" part means that he'll attack on Saturday at noon. It's the twelfth, at noon.

      "What of the hatred writing that's on here?" asked Dumbledore.

      "Look at the map, now notice the spots marked?" Lily asked rhetorically. She grabbed a pencil from her bedside table, and the news paper. Dumbledore followed.

      "Now look," she instructed. Going from the dot near London, to the last dot in Hogsmeade, she traced one word.

      "Mudbloods," breathed Dumbledore.

      "But there's a missing dot, and that's right on London. It's Diagon Alley." She revealed. Her voice had gone back to its normal tone, but her eyes remained the same hateful near-black.

      "I'll send this to the Minister, he'll decide what to do, but I really must thank you deeply. I'm sure the Minister will find some way to repay you."

      "No problem," replied Lily hoarsely.

      "My condolences to the loss of your aunt," he added.

      Lily visibly tightened up. Every muscle in her body had clenched. "I'm calling my s-sister tonight to arrange the funeral. I can owl you if you want to come," Lily said through gritted teeth.

      "They need to know sometime, you can't keep this from them." Said Dumbledore.

      "_They_ don't need to know what it hurts like just yet. They don't need to know that after you've lost possibly the closest person alive to you, and the closest thing you've had to a parent in this country, you want to curl up and wait to die." She said quietly in a low voice.

      Dumbledore blinked and nodded. "I seem to have overstepped my boundaries, I apologize."

      "I accept."

      "I best be on my way, when I left, Filch had found his cat stuck in a toilet on the second floor."

      He turned to leave. His handle was on the door when Lily asked him, "Give her a good kick for me."

      "I'll do some variation of that, and give James a good hug for me," he told her over his shoulder.

      "Why? I don't see him till September," Lily asked.

      "You'll see him a lot sooner, I'll guarantee that," Lily could almost hear him smiling. A small _pop_ was heard, and he was gone.

      Lily headed downstairs to the phone. She dialed the area code, then Petunia's phone number.

      "Hello?" a gruff, agitated voice said into the receiver.

      "Can I speak to Petunia?" Lily asked.

      "Who is this?" the man asked rudely.

      "Just hand her the phone Vernon," Lily said in a tired voice.

      "Alright, hold on." There was the sound of a phone on wood, before it was picked up again.

      "Hello?" an annoyed voice asked. _'She must've been cleaning…no sterilizing, like she's done forever…picky she was. Hope Vernon doesn't mind doing everything with rubber gloves' _Lily thought, amused.

      "Hello, can you hear me," Petunia snapped.

      Lily quickly shook her head. "This is Lily; I need you to come back here for a funeral."

      "Who's?"

      "Aunt Faith's"

      "What? How'd she pass on?"

      "Get over her and I'll tell you."

      "I'm on my way, did you start planning it yet?"

      "No, I wanted to wait for you," Lily told her. Lily's voice seemed to change a lot; this time, it sounded worn out and depressed.

      "I'll be on the next train, I'll catch a cab there, just get some rest and we'll plan this out," Petunia soothed.

      "Alright, bye," Lily hung up. Instead of heading to bead like Petunia advised, she headed down the stairs to the reck room, and over to the punching bag. She'd originally planned to just throw in a few hooks, but it turned into an all out battle with punches, sudos, and kicks. She pushed her limit, and stopped just short of sheer exhaustion, leaving barely enough energy to shower and collapse on her bed, completely forgetting that she hadn't eaten anything that day.

      "She'd want me to be the best, no matter what," she told herself before falling into a dreamless sleep.

      Lily woke groggily to the sound of Petunia's screeching voice.

      "I'm up," Lily whispered. She didn't have the energy to say anything louder.

      "Well lets get started, I need to get back to Surrey," Petunia snapped. "Oops, I didn't mean for that to sound so rude," she added apologetically.

      "I've just learned to ignore the majority of it," Lily stated bluntly. Petunia grimaced at how emotionally she said that.

      "We should get started."

      Lily followed her into the kitchen. "I haven't been here in so long," Petunia breathed.

      "Come on."

      The two settled around the kitchen table. "I don't want a big funeral, I don't want it to be openly public," Lily started automatically.

      "Why?"

      "If they wanted to broadcast the death of Voldemort's murder victim, they can do it with someone else."

      "Alright, we'll invite some friends, relatives, and a few strangers, you're more likely not to be asked about her if there are some people you don't know," Petunia ordered. Her tone didn't leave room for argument. Of course, Lily couldn't find the energy to.

      "How about we hold it at Courtyard Cemetery, it's big, and it's beautiful."

      "Alright, I'll call and see if we can get a spot, listen, are you sure you're alright?" Petunia noticed Lily's gaunt and emotionless look.

      "I'm fine, just a little tired." Lily lied.

      "So, we'll call and see if we can get a funeral at the church a few blocks down and the burial say, next week?"

      "Sure, the sooner she's gone, the sooner I get over it," supplied Lily emotionlessly.

      "Okay, hand me the phone and the phone book," Petunia asked. She found the number and dialed.

      Three quarters of an hour later, Petunia set down the phone. "Done."

      "Good," Lily said.

      "Is that it?" Petunia asked.

      "Other than the invitations."

      "I'll get those out sometime this weekend," Petunia sighed.

      "I can do that," Lily put in quickly.

      "No, you just set everything up next Wednesday and we'll call it even…I suppose I should get going, I need to finish cleaning," Petunia added.

      _'I _knew_ it'_ Lily thought. "Well have fun sterilizing," Lily smiled. It was not a haunt of a grin, no poor attempt at a smile, it was a true smile that seemed to lift up her spirits and her eyes lightened up slightly.

      Petunia rolled her eyes. "You're an odd ball, but that's why I let you grow on me," Petunia joked. She walked over to Lily and threw her arms around her. Lily's happy moment had gone as quickly as it had come, so she didn't return it.

      "I'll see you in a week," Lily told her. Petunia left, and Lily was all alone again.

      "They can never know, none of them, not even Remus." It had begun to downpour, almost as though the sky seemed to be doing Lily's crying for her. Thunder and lightning were heard and seen in the distance.

      Lily headed out the door with out a jacket, just her shirt and pants. She decided to walk along the road that the cemetery was on.

      She was soaking wet, and chilled to the core by the time she reached the cemetery. It was just the road, then the sidewalk, then the grass that led onto the grave yard. Lily looked at the place that would soon house her aunt. She couldn't bear to see it any longer, and took off farther down the road, to an abandoned church.

      Lily noticed that a light was flickering in the church, and decided to check it out.

      Lily noticed that the door, though boarded up, had been easy to open. She walked up the aisle, past all the empty pews, and to the alter, where a sort of candle shrine had been set up, with a picture of Aunt Faith in the center.

      She picked up the picture, briefly smiling, before it turned to blind rage. Rage at the world, rage at Voldemort, rage at herself, rage at God.

      A low growl emitted from her throat, before turning into an all out scream of hatred. "NOOOO," she threw the picture at a statue of Mother Mary, the frame and glass shattering on impact, before falling to the dark marble floor.

      "NOOOO, WHY'D YOU LET HER DIE, WHY'D YOU LET HER DIE?" Lily screamed at the ceiling. "WHY'D YOU-I…WHY'D I KILL HER? WHY'D I LET HER DIE? WHY COULDN'T I OF WARNED HER OR DONE SOMETHING? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ANYTHING?" Lily screamed at the roof. She tore everything from the alter, down.

      Most of the candles had gone out, but one managed to roll over to the picture. It had caught the corner of the picture on fire. Lily kicked the alter over, broke the pews, and tried to bring down the support posts, but slipped. Her back landed against the post as she slumped to the ground.

      Rain had leaked through the roof, landing on Mother Mary. Lily was sweating; her hair had fallen out of its usual ponytail. Her eyes shined, but she rubbed them hard.

      "Why, why'd you kill someone who didn't deserve to die? Why'd you let me not help her? Why does each step I take seem to be harder than the first and why does each breath seem to be heavier than the last? Why do I go to bed, wishing it was day light, but when the sun finally rises, all I want to do is sleep? Why'd you let her die? Why'd you kill me a thousand times over? Why……" Lily asked in a defeated tone.  She looked up at the statue, rain had fallen onto Mother Mary's face, in such a way that it looked like she was crying. "Why me?"

      Lily slowly got up. Each bone in her body ached from strain, and fatigue. A haunted look had taken over her face, and each step toward her home seemed to cause tremendous effort. She felt drained, both physically, and mentally.

      She hadn't had anything to eat for nearly two days, but still didn't feel the need to eat. While washing her hair, it didn't feel like there was a reason to even try and clean up, like she was just going through the motions, not really knowing why. Lily looked down at her body in a mixture of disgust and loathing. "it's all my fault, so quit acting like a four year old," she growled at her self while in her room. Airz hooted from across the room, but she ignored it and just threw him a treat.

      Lily pulled her pajamas on clumsily, due to sheer exhaustion. She walked over to the bed, and let sleep overtake her as she collapsed.

      ONE WEEK LATER…

      Lily sat in the front row of the church, waiting for her name to be called so she could do the eulogy. "I'd like to welcome Lily up to the podium," said Father Michael.

      Lily walked slowly. The stand had drawn up to her before she really wanted it to. Lily stepped up. She took a breath

      "My aunt was the greatest person I'd ever known. I mean, she put up with me for five years, you had to be great," the crowd gave a subdued chuckle. "I mean, from me getting an A on a paper, to me stealing the car on Saturday nights…she was there, either to scold or to encourage. But she was there. She never gave up on me, even when others told her I was a lost cause.

      "Please don't forget about her, don't let her just drift away from you. Don't let her just be another face in the crowd. She deserved more than that in life, she deserves it in de-death. Thank you," with that, Lily stepped off of the podium. She noticed Petunia in the crowd, looking at her ruefully.

      Lily walked over to the casket. She looked almost, peaceful. Lily looked at Aunt Faith's face and gripped her hand, slipping in their family locket, with a picture of them fishing in the shape of a heart. "I love you…Mom," Lily said.

      She watched as they put her casket in a six by six hole. They lowered her to the bottom, and started to cover her up. "it's your fault she's in that position," she reminded herself.

      Two hours later, the last of the guests had left. Only she and Petunia remained. Lily turned to head home, but Petunia gently grabbed her arm. Lily visibly tensed, and Petunia let go sharply.

      "It's not your fault Lily, and it never was. Don't start beating yourself up every time something bad happens," Petunia consoled.

      Lily turned and gave her a haunt of a smile. _'Just go through the motions, make sure they don't know how you really feel'_ she thought.

      "The reason why, is because every time something bad happens, it usually _is_ my fault," Lily growled. With that, Lily headed home.

      The house felt very bare and empty. Lily headed to the kitchen to try and force herself to eat, for she hadn't since two days ago.

      She found some leftover pasta and nuked it in eh microwave. Lily set it on the table, and grabbed a fork.

      Lily tried numerous times to get herself to have at least one bite, but she would get it up to her mouth, and set it back down again. She just sat there, playing with her pasta, before abandoning it and heading upstairs to her room.

      She walked over, without even bothering to undress, and passed out on her bed.

      Review…please…

Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I have to work up nerve to write certain parts.

Since I feel so bad…I'll give some of the stuff happening within the next chapter:

      Lily goes to Hawaii

      Brittney states her lifelong interest in music, and Sirius becomes intrigued

      Brittney fills in for a guitar player in a band (tell me who, I don't care, just no pop, perky stuff)

      They have a close encounter with Moony and…well…the moon.

      Lily states something about her biological parents.

      Brittney has a fear of something

      Review, and I'll update as quick as I can…I've been busy. UNTIL NEXT TIME FOLKS!!!!


	16. summer vacation

Lily awoke to the sound of her stomach rumbling loudly. For a moment, she wondered why. "Duh, you haven't eaten for three days, why wouldn't you be hungry?" she asked bluntly.

She heaved herself out of bed. Bad idea; she got dizzy, ended up running into the bathroom and puking stomach bile into the toilet. It left a burning sensation in the back of her throat. _'You deserve it after letting your pride get in the way of her safety.'_ She scolded.

Lily saw her own reflection. A gaunt, sunken look had taken over her face. Her eyes were the same dark; and there were heavy bags under her eyes. Her hair was limp, and unkempt. She chuckled wistfully. "I look like death-" but stopped mid-sentence. "I should get something to eat; no one can know what happened. It would just dig up questions I don't-can't answer."

With that said, she stumbled clumsily down the stairs. After throwing the old pasta in the trash, she slurped a can of micro-waved soup. "Never could cook, that was H-Her job."

DING DONG. The door bell had rung. "Who the hell would knock this early?" she looked at the clock; four o' clock…p.m.

"I knew that."

Lily pulled her hair back into a messy pony-tail as she headed to the door, quietly thanking whoever, had gotten rid of the sunken look on her face. Lily opened the door.

An extremely ecstatic look spread on Lily's and Brittney's faces as they threw their arms around each other. "Oy, don't forget about us!" the twins interrupted as they greeted Lily warmly.

"What're you guys doing here?" asked Stripes.

"Well, we're not the only ones…" Kobe trailed off.

"Then…oh no."

"Oh yes…Arses incorporated has decided to live with us for the rest of the summer…" Kobe started.

"And since we're living with you, they do to-" Logan finished logically.

"Great, I turn 16 with the Neanderthals…_and_ Asses incorporated; I wonder if He really _does _hate me this much?" Lily looked upwards, as she did, not three days ago. She remembered painfully.

"Now is that any way to talk to your big brother?" Remus asked rhetorically, as he walked up the steps; the two shared a hug.

"You're only older by four months, don't push it."

"So, who's packing up the bags?" Sirius asked as he lugged, what looked like his entire bedroom…in four suitcases.

"Oh no. we have a rule in this house: you bag it, you drag it." Lily warned.

"But I'm _so _tired," Sirius whined.

"So take a nap on the deck chair and pack your bags in when you wake up. I ain't dragging the suitcases," Lily snapped.

"Alright, alright, forgive me your highness." Sirius bowed.

"Don't you forget it," she replied regally. She threw her nose upward in a snobby manner.

"That's a big target if someone decided to slit your throat." James said while walking up the stairs.

Lily put her chin down quickly.

"So what have you been doing for the past two weeks?" Brittney panted as they heaved their bags to their rooms.

"Forget that, who's sharing with who?" Remus asked. "There's your room, then the four guest rooms."

"Kobe and Logan, you share one, Potter, you and Black, well…pick one with something shiny in it, it'll keep you _entertained_ for a good part of the summer. Brittney, Remus, you get your own rooms," Lily ordered. They finally reached the second story.

"What about that door over there? It looks like a bedroom," Sirius pointed to Aunt Faith's room.

"It's, it's not. That's just storage," Lily lied quickly. Sirius gave her that sure-it-is look. Lily shrugged her shoulders and walked on. The twins got the green and purple room, James and Sirius got the quidditch room, Brittney got the blue room, and Remus got the red and silver room. "Silver reminds me of me," Remus laughed hollowly while putting his trunk on the floor.

The groups settled themselves around the kitchen. "I'm hungry," James announced bluntly.

"Congratulations," Logan drawled.

"Me too; Lily, cook me something," Remus pouted.

"You can cook better than I can!" Lily exclaimed.

"Fang, go make some pizza," Kobe ordered.

"How about we order out and say I cooked it?" Brittney replied.

"How 'bout no…your pizza is awesome. I mean, have you tried it? It beats five star restaurants any day," Logan told them all.

"Fine, Oy Stripes, you got flour and some yeast?"

"If I do, then it's probably in the pantry, but I don't even know the difference between yeast and flour."

"I GOT DIBBS ON THE COUCH…LAST ONE THERE HAS TO GET SNACKS!!" James yelled as he, Sirius, and Remus raced into the living room.

"I wonder if they even heard the conversation," Logan mused.

"I think they zoned out after knowing Fang would make pizza…" Kobe answered.

"Oh no…they were gone _long_ before that," Lily told them; her smile may have looked real, but it didn't feel like it.

"I best get started before arses incorporated decide to eat themselves….on second thought, they can wait," Brittney laughed sardonically. "What's with the baggage under your eyes there Stripes?"

"I've been busy. Lots a stuff I gotta do, like make an attempt at mowing the jungle we call a lawn."

"Can't your Aunt Faith do it?" Logan asked.

"She's on a three month cruise in Greece, won't get back until September fourteenth I think," Lily fibbed.

"Oh, are you sure that she'll like us here for a month and a half?" Kobe questioned concernedly.

"Nah…in fact, the seven of us are going to Hawaii for the a couple weeks. My aunt wanted to plan something special for the big one six."

"The three stooges are going to have to buy their own tickets, huh?" Brittney chuckled.

"Yeah, there ain't any way in hell I'm letting them stay here for two weeks. I'd rather eat my own food!" Lily exclaimed.

"I'd rather eat your food too," Kobe snorted.

The four laughed; Lily's sounded hollow, and Brittney noticed it. "Are you okay?" she asked worriedly.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" Lily responded brightly.

"You just…you don't seem like yourself," Brittney observed.

_'You let her find out. You're being weak.' _Lily's mind scolded.

_"No I'm not"_

_'Then prove it.'_

"No, I'm fine, always have been, always will be." Lily lied.

Brittney knew she was lying, but brushed it off. _'She's probably just a little worn out.'_ Her thought sounded unconvinced; however.

"When do we leave?" Remus asked as he came into the kitchen.

"You three'll leave when you buy your tickets, the four of us-" Lily motioned to the four girls. "-are leaving tomorrow."

The rest of the marauders headed into the kitchen for more snaking room. "Do you have any instruments around?" Brittney asked out of the blue. "That are _musical_," she added at Sirius's quickly opening mouth.

His mouth didn't shut; however, and he looked at her evilly. "I can think of one...it may smell afterwards, but I can play _Polly Wally doodle_," Sirius offered.

Brittney, Lily and Logan looked at the floor. Kobe however, looked at him. "There's a room for that, if you wish to kill someone with your flatulence, please make it yourself. Now go to the bathroom and _practice_." She hissed acidly.

"Well fine...only if Kaind comes with to see if I'm _fine tuned_."

"Knew I should have taken shop instead of band...but, screw it, I like _band_ instruments, not hearing someone fart their ABC's," Brittney turned towards Sirius.

"And just so you know, a BAND instrument consists of, clarinets, flutes, saxophones, trumpets, baritones, tubas, drums and other stuff....oh and if you're really good, then you can start working on stuff like electric guitar and base. And unfortunately, we're stuck with you for another month and a half, and if I'm forced to hear another _flatulence_ joke from _any_ of you...INCLUDING THE TWINS, I shall rip your throats out with my bare fingernails!"

The rest seemed to pay no heed to Brittney's threat, and were on the floor, clutching their guts because they were laughing so hard. "WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS SO FUNNY?" Brittney screamed. "BLACK!

"Yes...Little Bunny _foo foo_?" Sirius asked with a straight face. It didn't last and he was on the floor laughing again. Brittney reached up to feel her newly grown ears, and managed to see a tail out of the corner of her eye.

"If you don't fix what happened, I'll make it so that Malfoy will be eternally in love with you...because you'll be the best looking ''It'' in school." Brittney hissed dangerously.

"Stupid question-" James started.

"You have a lot of those-" She growled.

"What's an "It"?" James and Sirius asked together.

"Where your not a male, but your not a female either." Lily answered.

"Unless of course, you're a 'what'," Kobe started.

"Then you're a little bit of both," Brittney finished.

"I withdraw the question," James mumbled.

"So...best get on the phone and reserve three tickets to Hawaii, in the next two days...and they have to be away from us," Lily said in a sickly sweet voice.

"No worries here," Sirius muttered.

"Good, then finding a seat away from us should be no problem..."

ON THE PLANE...

"TRUST MY LUCK! WE GET STUCK WITH THE THREE AMIGOS! STUPID AIRLINES" Lily complained loudly.

"Well we tried Lily...there were just no seats available," Remus tried to reason.

"THAT'S A LOAD OF-"

"Little children here," Brittney whispered.

"Poo?" Lily finished weakly.

Meanwhile, Sirius and James were three aisles away, staring at a bearded, sleeping man in purple tinted glasses.

"Prongs?" Sirius asked.

"Padfoot."

"Why does the man have a furry face?" James shrugged, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Padfoot?"

"Prongs."

"Why does he have hypnotic purple tinted glasses of doom?"(DAVIS!!!)

Lily crept up silently behind them. "The world may never know," she whispered harshly. The two jumped.

"We-we err..."

"IT WAS HIS ENTIRE FAULT! I SWEAR IT WASN'T ME!" Sirius yelled.

"Please sir, I'm going to have to ask you to keep your voice down, if not, I'm going to have to ask you to leave," a flight attendant ordered. _'Typical...Black's going for the blonde...why should I care?' _Brittney thought.

_"Because you're starting to like him, and you don't want him to take the easy way out"_

_'HA!'_

"Well, I guess I do kind of...nah I couldn't, could I?" She pondered.

"Well-" Sirius looked at the name tag. "Cedar Ella, I'm disinclined to equiest your request."

"Excuse me sir?" she asked.

"Means don't bug him, he's had six cups of coffee, about murdered the doughnut guy for the rest of the jelly filled, and he's had several Mars Bars...all of this before eight o' clock this morning," Brittney explained.

"But how could he eat so much?" the flight attendant questioned.

Brittney looked at the name tag. "Jane-" she gave Sirius a pointed look. "We've come to the conclusion that he has a hollow body, and food just fills from the toes up."

"Ah. Well, we're departing in a few minutes, please take your seats."

Brittney grabbed Sirius's forearm and literally dragged him across the floor of the plane, threatening to give him first hand experience of being an "it", and a "what".

He moved willingly when he saw a Hershey's candy bar.

"Works every time," James chuckled. He tossed the candy bar over Logan's head. Sirius caught it and ate everything, including the wrapper.

"Did you even _taste _it?" Kobe asked incredulously.

"It's Sirius-" Remus started.

"Good point." Kobe acknowledged.

"So, how long for the flight there Stripes?" Logan asked. She cast a furtive glance at Remus; she didn't know why, but she somehow hoped that he would answer instead. Her wish came true.

"I think the tickets said that we would land at about one," he said while looking at his itinerary.

"In the afternoon?" James asked.

"In the morning there Smart One..." Lily sighed.

"Well that makes-what, six hundred and sixty two stupid question he's said-" Logan began, only to be cut off.

"In my Hogwarts career?" James questioned.

"Better make that six hundred and sixty three..." Lily muttered. _'I wish She was here right now, I'd do anything to get her back...even put aside my pride. And what caused it, why'd you-I kill her?' _she thought miserably.

Lily's face had dimmed slightly, but no one noticed. They were all busy staring at Sirius trying to get the plane's bathroom door open. "For God's sake, honestly," Brittney leaned over and said quietly to the twins and Lily, before getting up and walking over to Sirius; she grinned evilly.

"That's not a good sign, is it?" James asked.

"Hey, an intelligent question for once!" Kobe announced briskly.

"Shush, I wanna hear her," Remus hushed them.

"Bloody door won't open-" Sirius grunted while trying to push the door inwards. "Bloody muggle contraptions."

"Well, _Sir-Siri,_ Black, you won't need to go to the bathroom, we're taking off," Brittney stated logically.

"And you tell me I, what is it? _Oh yeah_, state the stupid, and note the obvious," Sirius briefly told her before going back to work. "Them damn six cups of coffee finally caught up with me."

"Gotta pee so bad, you can _taste it_?" Brittney asked sweetly.

"Yes-wait," Sirius stood up to his full height, but since she came up to his chin, it didn't do much. "I mean, well-shut up!"

"I love torturing people," Brittney said cheerfully.

"I noticed." She chuckled for a while as she watched him become frustrated with the door. He got so mad, that he kicked a wall, and then hopped around, favoring his toe.

"Can you read?"

"Yeah, why?" Sirius asked.

"Other than the fact, that that's the sixteenth stupid question you've asked today-"

"You should talk," Sirius mumbled. Brittney just ignored him.

"Look at the _big_ sign on the door, yeah the one right in front of your face, the one that says to _pull_, not _push_," Brittney pointed out bluntly.

"Oh."

Well...Sirius pulled. But as it turned out, there was already someone in the bathroom, reading a NEWSWEEKLY. (Inside joke, stilts should get this).

"Bloody hell!" the woman screeched.

"SORRY!" Sirius quickly shut the door, slowly turning towards Brittney, with shock clearly written on his face.

"I don't have to pee anymore," he gasped slowly.

"I can think of a few reasons why...do your pants feel slightly _damp_?" she asked intently.

"No. they don't!" he replied hotly. "And I was wondering, how many shots of firewhiskey do you think it would take before the park of the brain that creates mental pictures dies? No, wait, you wouldn't _know_," he finished nasally.

"No, that would be Potter's job, and if he don't know, I'm sure he could create many more disturbing images," Brittney said before walking back to her seat.

"What was that all about Fang?" Logan asked.

"Let's just say that Black might have a weak constitution during the trip, along with a malfunctioning bladder," She answered mysteriously.

"Well, that was more information than _I _wanted to know," Lily said bluntly.

"You speak for all of us," James added while squirming around in his seat.

"Oh, God," Brittney wheezed. "I just realized that we're taking off."

"I noticed. And why the hell are you worming there Prongs?" Remus asked.

"I just realized it too. I don't like flying."

"You're on the quidditch team-"

"Then, I myself controlled how high I flew, here, we're about ten thousand feet off the ground, whereas, in quidditch, your only off the ground about fifty," he replied squeamishly.

"Here's a barf bag. Just don't use it around me," Lily said as she rammed the bag into James's chest.

"thanks-" James and his rapidly paling face replied.

"I wonder when the food comes around," Lily pondered thoughtfully.

"How can you think of food at a time like this?" James hissed.

"There's food?" Sirius asked, his eyes wide.

"Yes, Padfoot, there is food..." Remus sighed. He looked at Logan. "You see what I have to work with every day?"

She giggled. "Yeah, I do...now take a look at Stripes and Fang, and you see what I get to work with every day."

He chuckled back. "I rest my case."

About four hours later, the lunch trolley rolled around. "I want that, oh and some mashed potatoes, and some steak, and lots and lots of pie, and-" Sirius started hungrily.

"Black; shut up," Brittney whispered while elbowing him hard in the ribs. Sirius's breath dissipated quickly.

"How can you think of food at a time like this?" James once again wheezed sickly.

Lily got her lunch, and picked up a spoonful of apple pie. "Like this," she put the food in her mouth. She chewed it slowly and deliberately, not noticing Remus sneak her mashed potatoes off of her tray, and slip green beans on in its place.

"I think you should give him the window seat Lily," Remus told her sternly. "Look at the poor bloke."

"I do pity him, but I like the window spot," Lily replied bluntly.

"Lily, come on, please?" Remus begged. He gave her the puppy dog eyes.

She sighed. "Fine," she pouted. "Hold this Fang," she ordered, giving Brittney her plate of food.

"Lily?"

"Yeah, Remus?"

"Buttered veggies," he said while grinning like a Cheshire cat.

"Gimme my mashed potatoes back Remus!"

"What would you do if I told you I already ate them?" Remus asked weakly.

"Just wait until we land Moony, what a show, I bet you I could sell tickets and be rich enough to move out on my own," Sirius joked.

"What do you mean?" Brittney asked.

"My parents, are evil, they think that same mudblood garbage the Malfoy's do," Sirius growled. His eyes flashed.

"Oh, that sucks," Lily said.

"No kidding," He replied sarcastically.

Dinner had been brought around six hours later, and needless to say, Remus and Sirius dug into their supper with gusto.

"Mm...'is tays wike 'um's 'heaperds 'ie," Remus told then all with his cheeks engorged to the busting point with food.

"Oh yeah, I forgot what it tasted like...haven't had that in a long time," Lily groaned wistfully.

"You mean you actually understood him?" Logan asked incredulously.

"You didn't?" Lily responded curiously. Logan just rolled her eyes and went back to her dinner.

"'An I 'ave your pumpkin pie Kaind?" Sirius asked whilst showering Brittney with food.

"Nope." She replied.

"Why not?"

"Because."

"Because why?"

"Because if you don't quit with your daft questions...I shall smite thee onto the plane floor and then vacuum your remains, light them on fire, and throw them out of the bloody plane!"

"What's a vacuum?" Sirius asked quizzically.

Brittney rolled her eyes. "Shut up."

"Everyone has the right to shut up, Padfoot just lacks the capacity," James wheezed.

"Hey Potter-" Lily started. James looked over right as she put a piece of steak into her mouth and chewed it slowly.

"Oh God," James face disappeared into his fifth puke bag. There was a retching noise and James came back up, his face chalk white, and his body trembling violently.

"Go brush your teeth Prongs," Remus ordered. He shuddered. "And I thought Padfoot's dog breath was bad, phew!" he waved his hand in front of his nose

Brittney and Lily both rolled their eyes. "I'll help him," Lily said while heaving James from his seat, grabbing his personal bag, slung an arm over her shoulder and heaved him to the bathroom; trying to ignore the sparks that flew up her arm.

"I think I just threw up something I never knew I ate," he said weakly before brushing his teeth.

"Just try and sleep," Lily chuckled from the doorway.

"Mission impossible, I can't sleep until the other two are," James muffled reply came.

"Sure you will, if not, I'm goin' to punch you until you do sleep," Lily said in a slightly harsh tone. _'Oops, imagined it was Voldemort...forget about it! She's dead, and you can't bring her back,'_ Lily thought. Her eye's had glazed over, and had a far away look about them.

James waved his hand in front of her face. "Hello?"

"What?" Lily snapped.

"Were you having a vision or something, I've been asking you to help me back to the seat for a good five minutes," He snapped back.

She scoffed. "I'm not babysitting you!"

"I never said you were!"

"You're acting like it."

"ME! You bloody think I'm the one who needs a babysitter? Have you taken a good look at yourself lately? I just stated that I can't sleep until the other two are because I've learned that he who sleeps first, wakes up with worms in his knickers!" He hissed loudly.

"Oh," Lily choked the word out.

In an apologetic matter, she gently swung his arm around her shoulder and helped him hobble back to his seat.

"Budge over you lump," James said to Sirius, who had taken the aisle seat.

"Nope, you moved first, so your seat is available to the public," he said smugly.

"Do you want a reason to wear your knickers?" James growled.

"How do you know I wear knickers?" Sirius shot back with a sly smirk.

"Black, I'm in a particularly pissy mood, I'm tired, I'm hungry, I'm bored, and I have whiney Potter hanging on me like a two hundred pound tumor-" Lily started.

"I do not weigh two hundred pounds!" James exclaimed hotly.

"-so I'm not going to think twice about shoving you off to France with a load of monkeys," she growled.

"Do they have tails?" Sirius asked.

"Yes, they have two tails, as a matter of fact, and I don't think they'll think twice about using them on you," Lily hinted, a devilish grin evident on her face.

"Then...ewe!" Sirius said in horror.

"So shut up, and move!"

Needless to say, Sirius moved like lightning out of James's seat. James plopped down and grabbed his gut. "Moved too quick...room's spinning...since when did you have a sister Evans?"

Lily was irresistibly reminded of when she and Petunia planned the funeral. They had never exactly gotten along...well, Petunia never liked Lily, but Lily had saved her life, and Lily guessed Petunia felt in debt, so she was a bit more likeable.

A sound came over the intercom. "Attention passengers, we will be arriving in Honolulu, Hawaii, in approximately forty-five minutes, for those of you continuing onto Wrangell, Alaska (he, he, he), we have a midnight snack coming around fifteen minutes. Thank you."

"I know Wrangell," Lily said out loud.

"How?" James asked.

"I lived there for about six months, and then I moved to England."

"Where exactly have you lived?" Sirius asked.

"Everywhere Remus has," She said mysteriously.

"You're not really helping out the conversation," James muttered.

'_I didn't want to in the first place'_ she thought bitterly.

"Here, there, just around," she replied vaguely.

"Thank you, you've helped me so much," James mumbled.

"Your welcome," Lily responded brightly.

"Oh bugger Lily, we've lived in Alaska, Oregon, Texas, and we traveled to California for a few months," Remus filled in.

"Was that so hard Evans?" James asked nasally.

She rolled her eyes at him. "Do you _really_ want me to answer that?"

He put on a thoughtful face. "I withdraw the question."

"Are all guys this stupid, or is it just you three?" she asked rhetorically, while shaking her head.

"Hey!" Sirius asked in mock outrage.

Lily just smiled brightly.

Suddenly, the plane started to point downward. "What's going on?" Brittney asked in panic. She clutched Sirius's arm tightly.

"I need to use my arm you know," Sirius said while looking down upon Brittney. _'Her hair smells good...it's almost like vanilla, but with something else. I've got two weeks of sun tanning to find out what though'_ he mused.

"Ohm...Hey, ask me if I care," Brittney shot.

He gave James a pointed look. James nodded in agreement. "Kaind, if you don't let go, I'm going to smack you."

"And I'll make sure you never breed." She replied darkly.

"Oohhh, great comeback," Sirius mocked.

"Like yours was any better," she snapped.

"Please keep your voices down," a blonde stewardess hushed.

"I can make up better comebacks than you wish you could!" Sirius growled.

"Hit me with your best shot........Grandma," Brittney finished dryly.

Sirius shut his mouth.

"Bluffer," she scoffed.

"Just like Aunt F-Faith with a date that didn't go too well," Lily said quietly to herself. Unfortunately, Remus heard.

"You never did tell us why you lived with her, we still have a while before we land completely," He hinted.

"I live with her because I needed to," Lily said shortly.

"Why did you say needed, in past tense?" James asked suspiciously.

She stuttered for a moment. "It's early, I'm hungry again, I'm tired, I'm extremely bored, and I don't feel like bringing up my p-parents," she slightly spit out the last word, and Brittney saw.

Brittney didn't think too much of it, but kept the past part of the conversation in the back of her mind, along with other things. _'I wonder why she doesn't like talking about that.'_ Brittney pondered.

"Well, what are your parents like?" Sirius asked.

"I guess that you could say...they were extremely strict....they always made sure I did my chores...and I got grounded for a _long time_ when I didn't.....I guess you could say I was in a boot camp," she worded.

"My parents hate me, they disowned me a few weeks ago....and ole Phineas came to tell me the _good news_," he said sarcastically while giving them all perky thumbs up.

"Who's Phineas?" Kobe and Logan asked together.

"He's related, that's all. I don't care how, I don't care who, and I don't care why, all I really feel like caring the least about is the fact that he's related." Sirius said in a low, scary voice.

James grimaced at how much anger and bitterness Sirius held towards his now disowned family. "Sorry about your parents mate."

"They're _ex_-parents, remember? I don't have a family anymore," Sirius reminded gruffly.

"Right.....I wish-" Remus started.

"Don't wish you could relate, it's bad enough with one person, I don't want to watch one of my best friends suffer what I did." Lily looked sharply downward at this comment.

"I can always-"

"Just live with us," James finished for him. Sirius looked at James in shock.

"But I don't want to burden you and your family," Sirius muttered, his neck turning pink.

"As far as all of us are concerned, you are family. You were the one who converted me to the dark side remember?" James said fondly, and proudly.

"Yeah, if I wasn't at that convention with _them_, you still would have been the goody two shoes we are happy to never see," Sirius remembered happily.

"Nope, if you hadn't dumped the butterbeer on my mum's dress, we probably wouldn't be here remising," James chuckled.

"And if you two hadn't been friends, I'd be a book worm....well, more of one than I am now," Remus added sheepishly.

"And if we hadn't been stuck at your house all the time, you three-no four, would have been worse off doing pranks," Logan stated. She made an I-wish-they-hadn't-come-so-often look. Brittney burst out laughing at the absurd facial expression.

"What happened to that Pettigrew kid?" Lily asked.

"He's been moving between here for his folks since we came to Hogwarts....He managed to stay long enough to become animagi with us, and take the O.W.L.'s with us, then he moved to France, to go to some _school for the magical arts_," Remus said in a snobby tone of voice.

"He's workin' at the Ho Jo's?" Lily asked incredulously.

The Marauders rolled their eyes. "Yeah, he's a clerk at the Howard Johnson that DOESN'T EXIST!" He hissed loudly.

"Oh shut up."

Twenty minutes later...

"Oy, we've landed-" Logan said.

"THANK-" Brittney said loudly.

"Fang," Kobe warned.

"God," she finished lamely.

The seven trudged off of the plane...well, the six more or less dragged James away from the plane; his lack of energy proved him immobile to anything other than vomiting. "Come on you lump, we're just going to the hotel, it's another fifteen minutes and you can sleep. But you better-repeat, better not huck all over my shoes," Logan growled. James grunted in response.

After a grueling car ride, with Sirius's face glued to the window, ("Ahhh, everything's so bright and shiny,") James clutching his stomach, with Lily gently rubbing his back, (just think, you get to do this again," Kobe told him cheerfully. James only groaned.) And Remus snoring on Brittney's shoulder, ("And you thought _I _sounded like a wounded hippo," Brittney snorted) the seven were glad to have reached the hotel.

"All right, Miss Evans, what room did you reserve?" The clerk asked stupidly.

Lily rolled her eyes and smiled in a sad sense. "The one in the hotel," she snapped tiredly.

"Well, I'll give you the family suite, it's right on the water, many beds, and a balcony," The clerk said in a cheerful, perky voice. It gave the C.Y. headaches.

"Many beds huh?" Sirius hinted, while leaning on the counter.

"Yup, and if you don't quit hitting on every thing with four legs, we're going to take the covers from the beds, suffocate you with them, and dump you in the ocean," Kobe and her twitching eye repeated in the same cheery voice the clerk used.

Sandy the hotel clerk had handed each of them a set of keys, and told them that their room was one floor up, room 283 to be exact.

"Too many stairs...must sleep," Lily groaned.

"No duh, I'll never travel anywhere if it's not by floo. And Mum told me that traveling the muggle way was _fun_. Ha! That's a laugh," James mumbled.

"Hey, you can do more that vomit now!" Sirius noted happily.

James rolled his eyes.

The stairs ended, and the seven were faced with a long hallway filled with doors and numbers. "Too many numbers," Brittney whispered over to Lily. Lily nodded in agreement.

Three minutes later...none of the friends could find the room. "Two seventy-five, two seventy-seven, two seventy-nine-" Remus looked ahead. "Found our room."

Sirius trotted ahead and tried to open the door...with his wand. "_Alohamora_," He muttered. The door didn't do anything. "It won't open!" He whined.

Brittney walked met up with him. "Other than the fact that the wand's upside down, your fly's now undone, and your whining to me like the Third year Sarah Webber, you need a key to open the door there stoops," She smacked him upside the head.

"Ow!"

"Wada."

"Meanie!"

"Dork," Brittney grumbled. "Oh, and you had the key in your shirt pocket the whole time."

Sirius turned and gave James a pleading look, almost dog-like. "Don't look at me Padfoot, I'm just here for the food," he surrendered while holding up his hands in defeat.

"Men," muttered Sirius. The others looked sharply at him. He stared back in a confused manner. "What? I heard Kaind say that when she got a letter from Johnson-" he leaned over to James "she didn't know I put itching powder in her swim suit-"

"YOU DID WHAT?" Brittney screeched shrilly.

Sirius's eyes widened at the recently said revelation.

"well, I guess it'd be pointless to deny that, or the fact that I slipped it into the rest of the girls's suites.....or the fact that I still suck my thumb when I sleep and I have a teddy bear named Looney Luto and-" Remus put his hand over Sirius's mouth.

"What the bloody hell? Did someone slip veritasrium in your drink or have you just taken a stupid pill?" Remus questioned in an exasperated tone.

"I dunno....I'll tell you when I find out though," Sirius said thoughtfully.

James rolled his eyes before inserting his key into the door. A click later, the seven and their bags were stowed in various corners of the room. "Where the hell is my stuff?" Sirius asked wildly after exiting the bathroom.

He looked under the beds, in the closets, up on the ceiling, in his pockets; everywhere, but his luggage couldn't be located. "For Pete's sake!" Brittney exclaimed. She headed out onto the balcony and dragged his stuff back into the room. Sirius followed in a moment later; he hid his red neck behind his hand. "Seeing people like him, I begin to lose faith in the human race," Brittney muttered. Lily, Kobe, and Logan chuckled.

"Okay, we have four beds, and four people,-" Kobe started.

"No, it's seven," James interrupted.

"Nope, because I'm not sharing a bed with anyone....not even Logo," Kobe finished.

"Yes, you're sharing a bed, and unless you want to share it with one of us, you're sharing with your sister," James argued. His tone left no room for argument.

"Guys, we'll call down to the lobby for some extra beds in the morning, chill out," Lily reasoned. The other six grumbled, but did not argue. Instead, they climbed into the four beds, with the twins sharing the bed furthest to the left, and Sirius and Remus sharing the bed right next to them. That let James have his own bed. Brittney crawled on top of the covers and let her body drop onto the bed.

"You have serious insomnia problems Stripes," Brittney yawned. The other's muttered in agreement.

"I've always fallen asleep like this and the fact that there might a bug in the bed you're sleeping anyway-" Lily started.

James eyes shot open with a jolt, and Lily smiled at his reaction. She turned back to the near full moon; listening to the others one by one, drifting into a peaceful sleep, but not noticing that James hadn't dozed off, instead, he turned his head in her direction, taking in how she looked when just alone, not snapping, brooding, or putting on an act. She looked almost, angry, for lack of a better word.

The moon highlighted every line, some, were from the frown she had on her face, others, seemed to glow a pearl color. _'Scars'_ James thought in shock.

He pulled on the top to his pajama pants, leaving the buttons open. _Hawaii__ is too bloody hot to wear flannel!'_ he thought, and heaved himself out of bed.

Lily stared at the outside, bathed in moonlight and almost seeming dreamlike. She hugged her legs close, with her arms wrapped around them, and her head resting on her knees.

"Mornin' precious," she whispered sardonically.

"Ha, thank you for caring," he replied in the same manner. He crawled onto the window ledge, where she perched. James looked at her, almost silently begging for her to turn her head and meet his eyes. She never did. Instead, Lily spoke to the sky.

"What are you doing up?" she questioned.

"I could ask you the same question Evans," he answered.

"But you're not."

"How do you know I'm not?"

"Because that's not why you got up-"

"You have a point," he nodded.

"So why did you get up?" Lily asked.

I wanted to ask you about that night," James began.

"There are many nights, please do be more specific," Lily replied nonchalantly.

"In the library." The three words made Lily visibly tense.

"What about it?" she inquired harshly.

"Why did we start, and why did you stop?" he asked her, his tone showed his hurt.

"I think we both know why it started, and I stopped, because I remembered every time I saw my Aunt F-Faith kiss Carl."

"Well what happened?"

"She married him, and I was stuck with a Jack-ass who-well, it's not really important," Lily growled. Her eyes showed the bitterness she still held toward him, but James never saw, because Lily wouldn't look him in the face. "Why won't you look at me when I talk to you?" he asked softly.

The question caught her off guard. "Because," she replied shortly.

"That's not the answer," he said quietly.

"Well it's the answer I'm giving you," she snapped dangerously. He reeled as if he'd been hit in the face.

Lily realized how short she'd been and tried to apologize; with tried being the key word. "I'm s-s-s-I'm going to bed." With that said; she pulled herself up, ungracefully and limped to bed.

"What's wrong with your foot?" James asked off-handedly

"Fell asleep," she lied.

"And I'm a woman in disguise," he muttered sarcastically, before crawling into bed himself.

Eight hours later, Sirius was up, soaking wet, pajama pants sticking to him, and chasing James, Remus, Brittney and Lily all around the beach. "YOU KNARK HEADS ARE GOING TO GET IT SO BAD WHEN I GET AHOLD OF YOU!" He screeched.

"CATCH US IF YOU CAN!" Remus called over his shoulder. Sirius growled and took off, peeling his pants off of his legs. "Oh and of course, I'm _blessed_ with these humongous-"

"BUT MUSCLED-" Brittney intercepted. Lily threw her a where-did-that-come-from-look.

"Legs," Sirius finished.

The others took off toward the ocean, but Brittney stopped just short, and ran to the woods that led up to a rocky cliff about a hundred feet above the ocean.

Sirius followed Brittney, not wanting to get more covered in water than he already was.

Towards the trees, through the trees, past the trees, panting up the hill, and finally cornering Brittney at the edge of the cliff.

"You are so going to pay for that," He panted dangerously. His scaring attempt didn't work, for Brittney laughed uncontrollably, bent over on all fours.

"What the bloody hell is so funny?" he wheezed.

"Your face, looks like Potter's did on the plane," she said before dissolving into another fit of giggles. He tapped his foot impatiently for a moment, until Brittney's giggling subsided. Then he tackled her. They fell off the cliff, and down to the water. "YOU CRACK HEAD! YOU'RE GOING TO DROWN US BOTH!" Brittney screeched while pounding his chest with her fists.

"NO, WE'RE JUST GOING TO MAKE A REALLY BIG CANNON BALL!" he yelled.

"SAME DIFFERENCE!" She hollered evenly.

SPLASH. The two landed, well, more like Sirius landed on his back, and Brittney's back landed on Sirius's front. Through the water, she heard his voice screaming what sounded like swear words. She sank below him, and panic overtook her. Brittney began struggling to get up, she struggled so much that she only sank farther. _'Goodbye cruel world, thanks for killing me and I'm not even sixteen yet.' _She thought. Only she never saw the "bright light" that you always heard of, instead, she remembered a quote: _'due to recent cutbacks, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off until further notice.'_ Air left her lungs, her vision darkened, and everything became hazy.

Then a large, warm hand grasped around her forearm, dragging her to the surface. She took a large gulp of air, and wrapped her arms around Sirius's neck. "Kaind, Kaind, Kaind," he coaxed. He pulled her away from his shoulder and pressed his forehead against hers. "It's okay," he murmured. "It's okay," he told her quietly, while gently rubbing her middle back in a comforting sense. Her loud gasps for air receded to silent, calm breaths.

She nodded and looked up into his warm gray eyes; a wave of relief washed over her. "We should head back," she whispered, breaking contact with his eyes; a very hard thing to do for her.

He looked down too, and relinquished his comforting grip. "Yeah, I guess we should," he muttered in a disappointed tone. _'I really like her, I wonder if she likes me? Well, don't do anything drastic or you'll lose her forever'_ he ordered. _'I'd rather have her as a friend forever, than just a month as a girlfriend.'_

The two swam away from the deep spot which they had their tender moment. "Wanna race?" Sirius asked slyly.

"Last one has to buy breakfast," Brittney challenged.

"I hope you brought money with you Kaind," He shot. "GO!"

The two each took a large breath before Sirius diving underwater and Brittney starting to swim the freestyle stroke. Well, Brittney got there just a second before Sirius. "That was unfair!" he exclaimed.

"How so?" she questioned perkily.

"Be-be-because it is!"

"No, I won fair and square, you're buying breakfast from what we agreed," she pondered in an exaggerated manner.

He glared at her; she just smirked back before heading back up to the hotel room to change out of her wet clothes and shower.

James, Lily, and Remus came back a few moments after, winded, and curious. "Where'd you go Padfoot?" Remus asked.

"I went after Kaind, thinking I wouldn't get anymore wet than I already was-"

"Didn't work too well did it?" James asked stupidly.

"Nope, it worked great, I just took a shower before you guys showed up," He muttered sarcastically. "We did a cannon ball off of that cliff over there, and well, here I am."

A quarter of an hour later......Brittney still had not exited the shower. "I WANT A BLOODY SHOWER; I HAVE DRIED SALT ON MY BLOODY EYEBROWS KAIND!" Sirius screeched.

He put his hand on the bathroom's door handle, to find it unlocked. "A bad thing to do while I'm here," he said evilly. He opened the door to find the room filled with steam, and the only way he found Brittney, was her hair contrast. "BLACK, HAVE YOU LOST YOUR DAMN MIND? I'M IN THE SHOWER!"

"That would have sufficed for the first fifteen minutes, now, it's payback," he growled. Brittney threw a towel on around herself right before Sirius grabbed her around her waist, and carried her out of the bathroom as though she were a briefcase. He set her in front of an old grandfather clock. "What is that Kaind?" he asked sharply.

She inspected it. "it seems to be a piece of wood, mahogany, early nineteen hundreds, nice finish....worth about five thousand galleons I'd say-" she observed, just to tick him off.

"I mean the thing that tells the time that's in side the piece of wood."

"It looks to be a clock; did you need me to tell you that?" She played around. He sighed and rolled his eyes.

"The _clock_ tells the _time_. You should only take fifteen minutes for a shower, any longer, put a "do not disturb sign" on the door. You should not have to take a bloody hour shower." He lectured; his voice at a low pitch.

She yawned loudly, and sauntered back into the bathroom. "I'm going to take as long a shower as I need."

"Then I'm going in too." He stated.

"Oh no you're not!"

"Then get out of the bathroom." He replied simply.

"No, I'm not, and your not heading in either," she exclaimed.

"Like hell, I'm getting in that shower, and your not stopping me!" he threatened; and stomped into the bathroom with Brittney.

"Unless you feel like seeing me in my birthday suit, I suggest you exit the area," the rest heard Sirius say.

"I'm not leaving, I was here first," Brittney shot back.

He put his hands on the waist band of his pants. "OKAY, I'M OUTTA THERE!"

Sirius smiled cheekily as she exited the door. "I always get my way," he bragged.

"You're still buying breakfast," she shot.

"Damn."

"I pretty much always get my way too," Brittney said.

Two hours later, or ten o'clock a.m. the seven had showered, dressed, eaten, and were now on their way to the surf shop to buy more suits. "I'm not touching anything Black has," Brittney insisted.

"The feeling's mutual," Sirius drawled. _'Liar.'_ He reminded.

"I want something that covers my gut," Brittney muttered to herself.

"Why?" Remus asked.

"I don't fancy guys staring at a girl with a six pack," she replied.

"But you can't hardly see it anyway," James exclaimed.

"Oh yeah you can," Lily piped in.

"Nuh uh!" He retorted.

Brittney and Lily pulled up their shirts to show their stomach.

"I rest my case," Sirius said.

"You never had one," Brittney snapped.

"I can't see anything Brittney!" Remus argued.

"Stripes, can you see my six pack?" Brittney asked.

"Yeah, it's not as defined as, who-well-um...." Lily searched for a specimen.

"Ours?" Sirius and James asked cheekily.

The C.Y. burst out laughing. "Was it something I said?" James pondered.

"Prongs, they're laughing at us. Shall we disprove them?" Sirius asked.

"We shall."

"I'd like to see you try and disprove us," Brittney snorted.

Prongs and Padfoot pulled up their shirts to reveal their stomachs. Brittney and Lily quit chortling, and looked in wonder.

The C.Y. poked the guys's stomachs. "Nope, you win that argument, jeez, I still remember when you two, and maybe three-" Logan started, but James intercepted.

"He's got as good a gut as us, there Kanaham's."

"-were more feminine than us."

"Everyone's more feminine than you guys," Remus muttered. "Except for us."

The girls rolled their eyes; increasingly vexed at the Marauders' arrogance. "Have you ever heard of the saying 'confidence, not arrogance'?" Lily asked.

"Apparently not Stripes," Logan responded.

"Here, take this one, I need to take a whiz," Lily told Kobe whilst handing her a swimsuit.

"Alright," with that said, Lily went to "take a whiz."

Kobe put the one piece she originally had, and grabbed a modest two piece. "Stripes's going to hurt you," Logan told her sister.

"Not if I tell her I'm not the one who switched them....I'll just casually say that someone bumped into me and took the original suit by mistake," Kobe explained.

"Then you've just signed a death warrant to whoever ''stole'' the suit Kobe," Remus responded.

"But we'll help you Kanaham two," James and Sirius chorused excitedly.

Lily came back from the lady's room, and paid for the swimsuit, never once looking at what she'd been purchasing, but wondering about Kobe, James and Sirius's chuckles behind hidden hands.

"Stripes, they're scaring me," Brittney whispered.

They scare me too Fang," Lily said despondently.

_'Something's not right about her'_ Brittney worried. _'Something's wrong.'_

"Come on, are you going to stare at me all day, or go swimmin'? Lily questioned cheerfully.....her voice sounded fake, and Brittney noticed.

"I'll pass," was Brittney's response.

"Suit yourself, no pun intended," Logan said whilst coming up beside them.

"Why don't you like the water Kaind?" Sirius asked.

"I like the water!" she started indignantly.

"Then why don't you go swimming with us?"

"Because I don't want to right now."

"Ah, then why didn't you want to get in the water this morning?"

"Because the water's cold and I don't want to get cold and soaked that early in the morning," she said, as though it explained everything.

"Right," Sirius responded disbelievingly.

Brittney rolled her eyes and walked on, again, not noticing Sirius staring in intrigue.

The days passed, and soon it was the last few days in Hawaii. Brittney had refused to go every time she was asked, always making up some lame excuse and leaving in a hurry.

Sirius was heading out for another of his evening swims with everyone, and again, asked Brittney to go with them. Again, she refused and headed to the hotel room. "You guys go on ahead, I think I left something there in the room," Sirius said distractedly.

Sirius followed Brittney silently, to the hotel, and opened the doors noiselessly, only to find that she'd been lying down-her back facing him-on the bed. "Kaind, I thought you needed to do summer work for Cardel," he noted suspiciously. "If you don't need to work, why don't you go swimming with us?"

"Because."

"Because isn't an answer Kaind, and you know that," he countered. Brittney just shifted on the bed. Sirius sat down behind her, and put his hand on her side.

His presence behind her was demanding, but not overpowering, and his hand was comforting. "I lied about not liking the water," she began nervously.

"You're on the swim team-"

"Well, I like the water, just not ocean water...you always have to realize that the current can and will sweep you out from under your feet..."

"You sound like you know what you're talking about." Sirius said, more to himself than to Brittney. As much as she didn't like talking about it, he wasn't going to let her worm out of this easily.

They sat in silence for a while. Sirius got up from the bed, his hand dropping from her side.

"I was ten." Sirius sat back down, and his hand once again rested at her side.

"I was at the beach the week before I got my letter, and I was out in the ocean, havin' a grand ole time, when I saw this kid. He looked to be a little younger than me, and struggling to stay above the water.

"I swam over, and got him away from the current, but I got swept out instead. It's a scary feeling, not knowing what's up and what's down. I flew around for what felt like hours. Tumbling, tossing, slamming into rocks, everything melted together. That's why I didn't look to good the other day, at the cliff.

"When they found me, I was almost two kilometers miles away from shore. The paramedics mumbled something that I later found out, was that I had a bad case of hypothermia, four broken ribs, a fractured arm, and a bruised spleen....doctors told my mum that I was lucky to be alive; I felt lucky to have my arm. I was in the hospital for two weeks before they let me out.

"I don't like the ocean, because I know what it can do," she finished solemnly.

Sirius remained silent through the whole thing, and it was one of the only times he was rendered speechless.

Tears fell silently from Brittney's face as she remembered, remembered every scratch, every crack, every piece of seaweed that had caressed her in the water, every time she cried out, hoping someone would hear her, but knowing that no one ever did.

Sirius said nothing. He just lay behind her, the hand on her side moved to wrap around her entire waist.

The two were very close together, so close, that when Sirius breathed, the hair on Brittney's head would part. Brittney never minded; it felt calm, safe, like nothing bad could ever happen to her. She closed her eyes and leaned into Sirius, putting weight on his chest.

Brittney dozed off, waking up twenty minutes later with Sirius out cold. She tried to move away from him, but he proved to be twice as strong in his sleep. His grip was unbreakable, when she pulled away from him, but when she gave up and just turned towards him, his grip was loose and relaxed. She pushed away, his grip tightened; she turned in a circle, his grip let her.

"Black, you're an odd one," Brittney muttered before nestling her face in his shoulder, and falling into a comfortable sleep.

The rest of the group trudged up the beach, soaking, and tired. They walked in, to find Sirius and Brittney both sleeping with their arms intertwined.

Brittney awoke with a start, feeling something softly moving across her face, tracing her features, only to look up and find Sirius staring down at her warmly. "How long was I asleep for?" she asked in an embarrassed tone. She felt her cheeks redden.

"Well, you never snored, I knew you were pulling away, and you fell asleep nearly nine hours ago on my shoulder," he explained.

"Why didn't you just leave me here, and go swimming with everyone else?" she asked while looking around to find everyone's swim suits and trunks missing from the chairs.

"You latched on to my shirt and wouldn't let go, and I really didn't mind that much anyway, this isn't a bad way to wake up," he said calmly.

"Speak for yourself," Brittney muttered under her breath. Sirius laughed; it was a warm, energetic laugh that matched his personality to a tee. She grinned despite herself.

"Well, I'm hungry-"

"You're always hungry-"

"Then it should come as no surprise," Sirius countered dryly.

"You're hopeless."

"Your not, and I'm going to help you get over your fear of water," Sirius said proudly.

"What?"

"You heard me."

Brittney's eyes widened. _'He's stupid enough to go through with it too.'_

Sirius smiled cheekily before getting up and heading to the bathroom. Brittney used that time to hurriedly change her clothes, and leave the hotel to do some wandering.

She headed to the store with some twenty dollar bills in her hand, and saw an ad on the bulletin board next to the entrance doors.

**'Need a way to make a quick hundred bucks? Want to show your pals how good you are at guitar playing? Well here's your chance! Black sheep, the local hit band's guitarist has fallen ill due to a surfing accident. They have a show happening tomorrow and need a fill in, starting at ****nine p.m.****, and ending at ****one a.m.**** If interested, please head to 492 Cocoanut drive this Friday.'**

"TAXI!" Brittney screeched loudly. An Asian-looking man pulled up next to her. She got in the car. "Where to dude-ette?" the guy asked. He looked to be barely nineteen, blonde streaked hair, and light brown eyes. _'I love __Hawaii__ now.'_ Brittney thought.

"Dude?" Brittney blinked several times and stuttered, "492 cocoanut drive."

He put his foot on the gas pedal, and Brittney was thrown backward in her seat. "So, the dude-ette's a Brit?" he asked with a laugh.

"I guess you could say that....I'm here with some more of my friends for a summer trip," she answered good-naturedly.

"Are they all as good looking as you?" he hit on.

Brittney flushed so bad that it blended in with the sunburn on her neck. "Good looking is a relative term...._dude_."

He laughed. "Well, I wouldn't think it was."

"Well I wouldn't think that I'm abnormal either, but everyone else says differently." Brittney flirted.

He laughed again. "I'll give you that one; umm...I never got your name."

"I never gave it, but my name's Brittney, how about you?"

"Len; I guess your heading to the band auditions?"

"Yeah, I hope I don't leave disappointed...not many sixteen year olds are in gigs these days are they?"

"Well, not many almost twenty year olds are cabbies, they're usually forty year old bald guys who have never heard of deodorant," he pointed out.

"I guess I'm lucky then."

"I guess I'm lucky too," he flirted openly. Her blush darkened as Len parked in front of an old gym.

"How much was the ride Len?"

"It's on the house."

"Alright, thanks a lot."

"Good luck Brittney," he said with a lopsided grin.

"I think I'll need it," she muttered while getting out of the car.

Brittney walked into a dingy, dimly lit room, only to find twenty other sweaty guys, each one either smoking a cigarette, or staring at her in a daze. "Hey, shouldn'choo be over at the mall, starin' at something in pink?" one guy asked suggestively.

"Shouldn't you be laying off the crack, and learning your ABC's?" she retorted politely.

The guy narrowed his eyes.

Half an hour later, she walked up to the table, where she was handed an electric guitar, and told to play a solo.

Brittney walked onto the stage, and strummed a note. "Your E minor's flat."

She finished a few moments later. The Lead singer, bass guitarist and drummer were staring with their jaws wide open.

"You're in."

Brittney walked outside, and found Len waiting for her. "Are you stalking me?" she asked playfully.

"Maybe," he replied in the same joking matter. "I figured you had to come out sooner or later, and no one else needed a taxi, so I thought I'd do you a favor."

"Oh thank you for caring," she said facetiously.

"I do try," he said while rubbing his nails on his shirt.

"Ha, ha, ha," she replied as she hopped in the front seat.

"Where're we off to Miss Brit?" Len questioned.

"910 Beach Boulevard," she replied regally.

"Oh, someone sprang for the good hotel didn't they?" he asked.

"That's the good thing about having friends like mine," she said blissfully. Len chuckled.

The two reached the hotel to see Sirius walking out. Upon seeing Brittney and Len, his eyes narrowed, and his face turned a slight pink.

"So, how was your _trip_?" Sirius asked suspiciously, throwing a glance at the taxi driver.

"Pretty good, I'm filling in for a guitarist in a band tomorrow night at nine," she replied carelessly.

"Oh? Well I'm really _happy_ for you," he snapped before stalking inside the hotel again; slamming the door behind him.

"What crawled up his ass and died?" Len asked.

"His head," she answered bluntly.

A radio sounded from the taxi. "Hey Ace, this is King, you gotta call over at the store on sunset, over."

Len headed to the CB on the dash. "I'm on my way King...." He thought a moment before adding, "_Of hearts_."

A static was heard before, "Jack-ass."

"Well, duty calls, I'll see you tomorrow Brit," he winked before heading back into the car. She sighed, and walked into the hotel room.

Brittney opened the door and found Sirius sitting on the balcony, a sullen look on his face. _'So she doesn't like me at all, figures, she was too good to hope for anyway.'_ He thought bitterly.

"Black?" She asked warily.

"What?" he questioned back. His tone was cold, and had the expression to match.

"What's wrong?" she pressed.

"Nothing, don't push it." He snapped.

"Whatever," she waved him off. It hadn't meant to hurt him, but coupled with his rapidly increasing jealousy, and emotional venerability, and any way she blew him off, tended to sting.

He stood up suddenly, completely ignoring the looks he got from the rest of the group, who were spread around the television, and grabbed Brittney around the waist, dragging her out of the hotel, and onto a dock. He there paid the toll and grabbed a small skiff, gently setting Brittney in the base, and hopping into the back.

"What are you doing?" Brittney asked nervously.

"I'm helping you," he answered shortly.

Brittney's response was a short look of fear.

Almost three hours later, after the sun had set, so the entire island was in complete darkness except for what the stars provided, Brittney and Sirius were riding around on the boat.

"Black, bring me back now!" Brittney screamed for what seemed like the billionth time. She had a grip on the edge of the boat so tight, that her knuckles were a complete white.

"No, I'm getting you out here to-" Sirius stopped short. The boat engine gave a 'put, caput' and stopped completely.

"What the hell did you do?" she questioned shrilly.

"Nothing, the engine just died on us, I'll just pull the cord, and then we'll be on our way back," he said shortly.

Ten minutes went by and Sirius hadn't gotten the boat started. His eyes suddenly widened.

"Did you remember to fill the tank with gas?" Brittney asked, almost fearing the answer.

"It had half a tank when I last checked."

"Which was when?"

"When we left," he answered, putting his face in his hands in humiliation.

"YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER MORON!" she screamed at him. Her face was red and Sirius could have sworn he saw steam from her ears. It was actually a funny site. "I'M STUCK OUT HERE WITH AN OAR ON MY F-with an oar on my foot...WE'RE SAVED!!!!"

Sirius just looked perplexed. "What the bloody hell are you on about?" he wondered out loud.

"We have an oar, we can row back to shore and then I'll never have to go near the ocean ever again!" she continued blissfully.

She gave the oar a tug, and it wouldn't move. She gave another tug, but the oar stayed put. Sirius realized that he'd had his foot on the paddle, and lifted his foot right as she gave a gigantic tug, and the oar flew out of her hands, into the water, sinking rapidly. Brittney stuck her hands into the water, grabbing nothing but seaweed.

"Oh, crap," they muttered.

"Well, at least it couldn't get any worse," Sirius tried cheer her up. Lightning and thunder became evident right as a down pour started, soaking them from head to toe within seconds.

"Why must you speak?" she asked bluntly.

"It's not that bad Kaind," he tried to soothe.

"Oh yeah? _Not that bad_ is it? YOU AND I ARE STUCK, OUT HERE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PACIFIC OCEAN, NO POSSIBLE WAY OF GETTING TO SHORE, THE OAR IS AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN, I'M AFRAID OF WATER, WE'RE OUT OF GAS, WE HAVE NO FOOD, NO WATER, IT'S COLD, IT'S THUNDER, IT'S LIGHTNING, IT'S BLOODY RAINING, WE DON'T HAVE A CLUE WHERE WE ARE, IT'S DARK, AND TO TOP IT ALL OFF............_I HATE YOU_!" she yelled. Her nostrils flared, and her hands pounded the boat.

"Well if you jumble it all together like that, then it sounds bad..."

There was a creak in the side of the boat. "SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO? OH, BUT SINCE YOUR'RE THE FAMOUS SIRIUS BLACK, IT DOESN'T MATT-"

"KAIND! JUST SHUT UP! YOU DON'T THINK I PLANNED FOR US TO DRIFT OFF INTO THE OCEAN, DO YOU THINK I _WANTED_ TO SPEND THE NIGHT OUT HERE? WHAT MAKES YOU EVEN BEGIN TO THINK I WANT TO SPEND MY TIME OUT HERE WITH _YOU_?" he screamed back. His eyes had darkened to the color of the clouds, and were flashing dangerously. There was an air about him that had terrified her; chilled her to the core.

Brittney gasped and looked down. "oh, no, I didn't mean it like that, I mean-I don't want to spend all night here with you-NO, that didn't come out right-well, what I mean is-what I'm trying to say is that I want-" he stumbled.

"Just stop," she said quietly, but it was enough to freeze him in his tracks. His anger had passed, and he feared that he'd just managed to end whatever friendship and possible relationship with her.

He pushed through it. "I want to spend my time with you, just not on a boat." With that said, he slumped down in the boat, his eyes shining, and his brooding began again.

Nothing to do, Brittney turned her brown eyes to Sirius. He had a fine face, hair that fell elegantly into his eyes. His smooth neck fell onto lean, strong shoulders. A very strong, defined, but lean form was hidden under a large sweatshirt and jeans.

He had a comforting and masculine voice. It was mature...very unlike his personality.

Sirius made an attempt at conversation; unfortunately, his mouth found the subject before his mind did. "So who's the cabbie you were flirting with?" he asked rudely.

"Is someone jealous?" Brittney retorted slyly. "Me or the cabbie?"

He clenched his fist. "I'm just asking, I mean, you didn't mind flirting with someone you've never met, but you seem to have a real problem whenever I try to start a simple, polite conversation," he snapped.

"That's because you always talk about a subject I don't want to talk about," she replied nonchalantly.

"Well it's because you never tell me anything because you think I'm too stupid to comprehend," he said bitterly.

Brittney shifted. "I never thought you were stupid," she said quietly.

"Well Brittney, you sure have a funny way of showing it!" he snarled. She recoiled.

"I'm sorry," she apologized.

Sirius sighed. "I'm sorry too."

Sirius felt two arms wrap around his neck and Brittney's face bury in his shoulder. He hesitated for a moment, before returning the hug by wrapping his arms around her frame. Brittney relaxed, content to sit there. _'Just a friendly hug, don't lose him now, or you'll never be able to hang around him in the same way again.'_ She reminded herself sternly.

Hours had passed, and the rain had subsided. Brittney shivered against the wind that had begun. "Cold precious?" Sirius asked dryly. Brittney hit him on the chest.

He laughed and pushed Brittney away from him while unzipping his sweatshirt, soon pulling her back down and wrapping the thick sweatshirt around them both.

"I like your sweatshirt, it's comfy," Brittney mumbled sleepily.

"And I'm not?" he mocked.

"No, your fine...your soft," she mumbled softly, and finally dozed off.

"I don't know whether to take that as an insult or a compliment," he pondered to himself, and soon wrapped his arms tighter around Brittney, and fell into a dreamless sleep.

They both awoke, warm and at peace, to find the near full moon. "We should find somewhere to get Remus," she mumbled into his chest. Brittney raised her head and looked around. _'I wouldn't mind the ocean anymore if I was out here like this.'_ Brittney thought amusedly.

She sighed and looked around; a large amount of sand caught her eye, and then a hotel. "Sirius! We're SAVED!" she yelled. He jumped, not expecting the sudden outburst.

"Meh," was his reply.

"Oh come on, we can go and then I can _brush my teeth_!" she squealed in a girlish manner.

He rolled his eyes. "I'm goin' back for the food."

"Wait, the tide's going back out, oh no," she crumbled.

"All we need to do is swim Brittney," he reasoned. She raised her head from her hands and Sirius saw her eyes widen.

"s-s-_swim?_" she stuttered.

"Yup, s-s-swim," he finished dramatically.

"No," she refused.

"You leave me with no choice then," he said solemnly. Then he rocked the boat violently.

Brittney was thrown unexpectedly. A splash was heard and she started sinking to the sea floor. Once again, she felt a tingling sensation through out her arm as Sirius pulled her from the water, to the surface. She sputtered.

"Come on, just swim, it's just a pool, that's all it is," he soothed. She took a deep breath and nodded.

Slowly, almost antagonizingly, the two made their way to the beach. "Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, and swimming, swimming..." Sirius began to sing.

Brittney rolled her eyes and swam the freestyle back. "One in front of the other, that's all," She gasped and stopped suddenly, causing Sirius to crash into her.

"What's wrong now?" He asked tiredly.

"I just had a fish, bite my shoe, not many fish to that Sirius," She replied in the same manner.

He ignored her and swam on. Brittney followed suite.

The two crawled onto the beach, and slowly made their way up to the hotel room, and stepping in, fully clothed, into the shower.

Brittney's exhaustion showed on her face, there were dark bags under her eyes and her stomach rumbled constantly. She just wanted to get the salt water off.

Sirius yawned loudly, raising his arms to stretch, and knocking a bottle of shampoo off the shelf, and onto his shoulder. He hissed in pain as it connected with his collar bone.

Finally, Brittney stepped out first, letting Sirius have his turn at a proper shower. He came out ten minutes later, his hair looking like James's.

Brittney dragged herself back into the bathroom, and came out half an hour later than Sirius, to find him already sleeping on the bed. She walked over and curled up next to him, once again, letting sleep overtake her.

Lily, James, Remus, Kobe and Logan all stirred at the sudden 'flump' in their room.

James creaked his eyes open to see Sirius and Brittney curled up together on the bed. _'Padfoot, I swear you have a personality problem'_ He thought, and soon the sand-man took him away.

Lily and Kobe awoke simultaneously, hearing the squawk of a crow on the balcony. "Bloody squawkers," Kobe muttered grumpily.

"Tell me about it," Lily yawned in reply.

She walked over to Brittney, placing herself behind her, and lowered her voice once again to Sirius's pitch. "I didn't know you were that flexible," she whispered in Brittney's ear. Once again, her eyes opened with a start.

"LILY, THAT'S THE FOURTH TIME YOU'VE DONE THAT!" She yelled. Sirius just slept on.

"Black, you're a dork," Logan told the semi-unconscious form.

"NO, I WANT the moo cow Mr. junco," Sirius mumbled, and soon turned over and threw the pillow at James.

"He's still sleeping, every time he has the moo cow dream, he throws a pillow at me-don't ask Evans," he said shortly.

"Wasn't gonna," she retorted.

The day passed well, and during lunch, Remus ran into the restaurant. "LILY, LILY, LILY!" he hollered.

"What...what....what?" she replied, the rest of her French dip had slipped into her dipping sauce, and she looked at it disappointedly.

"I have a date for the concert tonight!" he said cheerfully.

"Please, I'm overflowing with joy," Lily muttered sarcastically.

"Oh don't be a stick in the mud Lily," he pleaded.

She rolled her eyes.

Eight o'clock came around, and Brittney was in a frenzy. "OH BOY, SIRIUS, MOVE OUTTA THE WAY!" she yelled.

"WHAT THE HELL?" he yelled back. "WHAT'S WITH ALL THE SCREECHING?"

Brittney shrugged. James and Remus raised their eyes to the ceiling.

It was soon almost a quarter to nine. Remus ran out of the door, with Brittney hot on his tail.

"I'm going to be late, I'm going to be late, I'm going to be late and they're going to find someone better than me," she worried.

"Okay, just meet her at the concert thing, that's all, I'll just follow Brittney to the thing and then I'll find her and then I'll have a nice time," he muttered.

"Holy crap, someone spent too much time in the sun....or they spent too much time around Black," Logan muttered.

"Join the club," Lily replied.

Brittney ran in the back room of the stage and found the rest of the group meditating. She stopped, out of breath.

The group finished and grabbed their chains and bracelets, put them on and walked past her to the stage and thundering applause.

Brittney froze. A wave of cheering people stared at her as she clumsily stumbled over to her spot. She envied the rest, they all glided over as though they were floating to their positions, and here she was, acting like ro-bo Joe and more or less stomping to the guitar spot.

The drummer started, then the bass. Soon it would be her part. _'Ta-tee-tee ta-tee-tee ta's and here's my part and there it goes. NO! Wait, it didn't, here we go.' _And with that, she played how she was taught to play. She flowed in perfect time with the bass and drums. Her notes seemed to harmonize with Shoot, the singer.

The song ended, Brittney's hands were worn from not playing in so long and then solo she had.

Remus was out side with Sandy, his date. They walked along the beach. Her blonde hair and blue eyes seemed to set off the evening. He'd been listening outside the booming arena and felt that the night couldn't get any better. He was right.

Lily had gotten smacked on the bum by one of the drunks in the arena and decided some fresh air would do her some good.

As she headed out, she looked up at the sky. _'Aunt Faith would have loved to see this, she'd of given her life to just glimpse it....well, she gave her life for me, and I'm watching the stars and the moon, knowing she's in a box in the ground because of me. I was so _stupid_ not to have told her!' _she thought angrily. Her eye caught the full moon, and she turned, slowly realizing the mistake she'd made.

Remus had stopped walking, complaining of a backache. He bent over and looked at his hands. Remus saw there was more hair, thicker hair, sprouting rapidly along his arms, and noticed that his shirt was becoming tighter with each breath.

"I thought the full moon would be romantic," Sandy said sadly.

"Oh, God, Sandy, get out of here, now-"

"But-"

"GET OUT OF HERE NOW! I need to find somewhere, get into the water, get to the water," he chanted huskily. Growls and grunts replace human English. His spine and nose lengthened, and tonight, he smelled human blood....tonight, he wanted the blood.

Lily sprinted back to the concert, thanking whoever had ended the song. "FANG, IT'S A FULL MOON! IT'S A FULL MOON!" she screamed, breathless, but the message got to Fang all the same.

"I need to split Shoot, thanks for letting me play with you," she said gratefully and set down her guitar.

Lily had run ahead, to see Sandy running toward her. "Help, please, Remus said to go to you if something happened," she cried.

"Um, okay, just go to the brown-haired person over there, she'll tell you what to do," Lily instructed pathetically. _'Notta clue what the hell I'm doing.'_

Moony turned and looked his wolf eye directly into Lily's jade one. He took off toward her, and Lily followed suite.

The two collided; Lily taking careful care to avoid Moony's jaws.

They tumbled and Lily managed to get out from Moony's large paw. She sprinted to the water, Moony almost grabbing her and sinking his teeth into her flesh.

Diving under the water, she changed into a tiger, and swam to the other side of the tiny peninsula.

Clouds moved over the moon, and many hours of playing cat and mouse, left Lily tired, weak, and wishing for the sun to rise. Her wish came true.

The sky pinkened, Lily was under water, heading to a small clove. Moony followed, popping his head up, and diving down in the chase.

It was underwater, that Remus began to morph. He managed to drag himself to the beach before collapsing on the sand.

Ten minutes later, a very bare Remus was on the beach, sobbing quietly. Lily came back from the hotel room and wrapped a large towel around him.

James and Sirius picked him up, and slung his arms around his shoulders.

The two dressed Remus, and watched Lily quietly as she stumbled past them, heard the shower turn on, and then see her come out of the steam filled room twenty minutes later. Her flannels felt comfortable as she lay down on the bed, grabbed Remus's hand in her own, and fell into a deep sleep.

Yeah, well, I'm really sorry for updating so late, and I'm trying a little more romance in the story to see how it works....as for the roads....I've never even been to Hawaii, so I'm making them up..(don't own nothing familiar)..sorry if it offends anyone. Well, I hope you like this chapter...12,456 words, and ninety pages done. Review please! The story needs it as bad as I think it is...(other's think differently)

Spread the wealth.....

Logangirl.


	17. Back to school

Two days later, the seven had packed their bags, returned the keys, and were now on the plane back home.

"Goody, another fourteen hours listening to Potter vomit," Lily muttered.

"You're the one who wanted me to go with you smarts," James retorted. His face was the color of bad oatmeal, and his hands had become shaky, though he looked a hundred percent better than the ride over to Hawaii.

"When's dinner Kaind?" Sirius asked; slinging an arm through hers.

"Dunno, don't care."

"Okay, well, aren't you hungry?" he asked.

"Not particularly," she replied. "I had some stuff before we left."

"Lemme guess, pancakes and bacon?"

"Nope, what gave you that idea?" Brittney snorted dryly.

"Maybe it was the fact that I actually saw you eat it?" he commented.

"No shit Sherlock."

The two did nothing but bicker the whole ride home; it got quite annoying to the rest, who were exhausted (Lily more than the rest, due to lack of sleep) and all ended up falling asleep on each other. Brittney's face once again, nestled against Sirius's shoulder. Sirius had his chin resting on top of Brittney's head, Lily had done nothing but curl up into a ball, almost afraid to sleep. Logan had her arms draped gracefully over Kobe's leg, and Remus had fallen asleep with his head on James's upper back, and last, but not least, James had his head lying on Lily's side.

There was a beep, what seemed like a second after Lily had lightly dozed, just enough to get her energy back. _'I know that pie can make you look bigger, but I didn't eat _that _much pie, holy crap!'_ She grumbled inwardly. The pie dreams she had, slightly disturbed her.

"WE HAVE REACHED LONDON INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT, FOR THOSE OF YOU DEPARTING WITH US; PLEASE REMAIN SEATED UNTIL A FLIGHT ATTENDANT DIRECTS YOU TO ONE OF THE EXITS, THANK YOU." A click sounded as he turned off the intercom, and the plane was silent, save the whirring of the engines.

A taxi ride later, the seven trudged into the spacious Evan's home. Completely deprived of energy, six of the seven hauled their bags and themselves up to the rooms, and collapsed on their beds.

Lily just walked past them, climbing silently out into the balcony, glad to have the rain to wash everything away. Every memory, every hiss, every shred of anger would just wash away in the comforting pitter-patter of water droplets hitting the pavement.

Hours passed, self-hatred came to a boiling point, and she had snuck down to the reck room. Completely avoiding everything but the punching bag at the other end, she let her anger flow, and the punches fly.

An hour later, she hauled herself up to the bathroom, sluggishly showered, dressed, and never made it to the bed before her body forced her to sleep.

She woke up a few hours later, a kink in her neck, and her body severely stiff. A pounding made her skull feel like it was splitting in two _'I've been through worse.'_ She reminded herself.

Clumsiness was an attribute recently acquainted with Lily as she stumbled ungracefully down the stairs. "Walkin' long Evans?" Sirius snorted into his eggs. Unfortunately, Lily heard the comment clearly.

Picking up a bowl of raw egg mix, she more or less stomped to Sirius's seat. "Evans," James warned. Lily openly ignored him.

She stopped right beside him. Sirius just managed to shove his last piece of bacon into his mouth, before he became drenched in egg.

"Don't do that Black, not when one needs an Advil so badly that you'll pound someone's head in to get it," Lily said quietly.

"Oh, bring it on Evans!" James yelled excitedly. He jogged to the fridge, and pulled out a bowl of still watery jell-O and dumped it all over Logan.

"YOU BLOODY ARSE!" Logan screeched; pulling apart the sticky, light brown hair strands. "You are so going to pay for that."

Three threats, two bowls of cereal, and Sirius landing with a 'thump' on the slippery floor later...a food war ensued. The friends had unconsciously split into two groups, of course, boys against girls. "That's not fair Evans, you have an extra person!" James called.

"Well, I kind of threw my arm out in baseball a few years ago, and I haven't been able to throw right-handed since!" she called back; ducking a handful of old spaghetti, only to look over her shoulder, see it hit Logan in the face, and get ice dumped down her shirt.

That whole day, Lily forgot her guilt, and acted like a regular kid for the first time in a long time. She didn't worry about being different, accumulations of anxiety for her friends's safety surpassed her, and she was a sixteen year old teenager, in a food fight with everyone but one person whom she cared about most.

The elated feeling didn't last. Lily went to bed with a goofy smile on her face, and woke up in the middle of the night, covered in a cold sweat and clutching her aching sides in a fetal position. She coughed.

With great effort, she stumbled to the bathroom and vomited. The bile finally quit rising to the back of her throat. She looked down at her violently shivering body, trying to remember why she had woken up so abruptly.

She wouldn't remember until later.

The aching had dissipated somewhat, to the point where it was unbearable, rather than excruciating, and hobbled painfully back to bed. Her wheezing refused to let her sleep peacefully, and she could do nothing but slip in to unconsciousness, and then waken to her dieing ribs. "God, don't let me go through that again," she pleaded.

She woke up three hours later, her back stiff, and her sides still hurting. Logan and Kobe walked in, curiosity written clearly on their twin faces. "What happened last night Stripes?" Kobe asked.

"What are you talking about?" she lied.

"We heard thumps and a door open. Fang was snoring, Sparky and Talons were down with us, Potter, Black and Remus were all sleeping on the couch, so all that was left with you," Logan stated logically.

"I fell off the bed."

"Uh huh," Kobe nodded disbelievingly.

"Whatever," Lily muttered. She heaved herself out of bed, and into the bathroom.

Twenty minutes later, Lily stumbled awkwardly out of the bathroom. Her hair was in disarray; her clothes looked rumpled, as though she had worn them the day before, and she continually yawned and clutched her sides protectively.

The morning wore on...and soon the noon sun had reached its peak. The seven all crowded around the fans, desperately trying to cool off. "Me is going swimming!" Remus yelled.

"Me too!" James followed.

"Me Four!" Sirius yelled after. The girls rolled their eyes at each other before following the guys.

Lily, Brittney, Kobe and Logan all walked out into complete chaos. All three guys were in their skivvies, in the pool, in a water fight.

Sirius turned, bringing a torrent of water with him, and spraying the C.Y.

The four were drenched, and the war just escalated. Brittney, Lily and Logan all jumped in the water.

Logan tackled Remus, dunking him under the water. He tickled her, and writhed out of his grip, but not fast enough for Logan to give him a dead leg. "OUCH!" he yelped, and hobbled over to the ledge.

"You deliver a mean punch," Remus squinted his eyes, while pulling himself out of the water.

Brittney wasn't having much better luck. Sirius had dove under the water and grabbed Brittney, pulling her to the bottom of the floor, and pinning her there with his own weight. He smiled.

Brittney smiled back, and pulled her hands out of Sirius's large ones, and tickling him in the ribs.

Large air bubbles escaped Sirius as he laughed underwater. He soon gave up and swam quickly to the surface. Brittney quickly followed.

"HA!" She yelled victoriously. Sirius rolled his eyes.

"You scare me sometimes, you know that?" He asked.

"Yup!" she said happily.

Lily meanwhile, had been cornered by James in the deep end of the pool. "What're you doing?" Lily asked. Her tone was confident, but he noticed the slight panic in her eyes. James's own hazel eyes must have shown his inquisitiveness, because Lily quickly shook her head and put on a mask of fearlessness. James saw through it right away.

James smiled evilly. Ducking under water, he grabbed Lily around the middle and slung her over his shoulder as he doggy-paddled to the edge. He pulled both him and her out of the water, and began to walk over to the kitchen.

"LET ME GO POTTER!" Lily yelled as she slapped her palms on his back. Having no shirt on, the slaps sent a stinging sensation through out his shoulders. He hissed. "PUT ME DOWN POTTER!" Lily continually screeched.

Throwing her momentum, Lily managed to get James off balance, and throw them onto the soft, recently mowed grass.

Unfortunately, James had twisted around, so they fell, in a secluded part of the yard, with him pinning Lily to the ground. James opened his eyes to find grass pressed against his spectacles, and Lily opened her eyes, to find James's bare shoulder pushing into her face. "GNAWGLES!" Lily yelled.

"Excuse me Evans?"

He was soon answered. Lily took his shoulder and began to lightly gnaw on it. He bit his lip. "That tickles!" he whispered hoarsely.

Lily looked up at him with a stupid look on her face. She stuck her tongue out at him.

The two locked eyes with each other again, and the same fluttering feeling passed through them.

James unconsciously threaded his fingers in between hers, his thumb lightly grazing the top of Lily's hand. His other hand cupped Lily's cheek, and, in the back of his mind he realized, that his face and hers slowly began to move closer.

Lily had the gnawing guilt in her stomach suddenly lessen a great amount, to be replaced by a feeling of happiness, a feeling she hadn't felt since the night in the library.

The thought made Lily freeze; a memory of a woman, a drunken man, and a bedroom. Lily remembered a seeing a little girl staring...just staring out the window, a dazed, thoughtful look on her face. She saw a bloody knife on the coffee table.

That day dream made her almost retch in fear, and in hatred.

Frantically, Lily shoved James off of her, pulling her hand away from his and sprinting to the house.

James just looked down at the grass; his hand lightly tugging on a blade, and his eyes downcast and worried.

Lily ran all the way to her bedroom, slamming the door shut. She ran to the bathroom and vomited.

When the bile would no longer rise to her throat, she walked shakily to the sink and began to brush her teeth. _'Haven't remembered anything until now; why?'_ Lily pondered as she washed out her mouth.

Her strength beginning to wane, Lily just changed into her "fat clothes" and hobbled down the stairs into the living room.

James meanwhile, had walked in a state of confusion back to his and Sirius's room.

"What happened mate? You look like you've seen a ghost," Remus asked.

"Let's just say that I'm not the one who's seen the ghost Moony," James responded.

"Whaddya mean Prongs?" Sirius questioned.

"It's a long story."

"We've always got time...the pranks should tell you that Prongs," Remus said lightly, but James heard the serious undertone.

James began to pace. "Well, you saw me walk her off over my shoulder right?"

"Yes," they chorused eagerly.

"So, I'm walkin' along, dumb as dirt, and then she, like, somehow manages to push me over. It's a tumble-toss, and then we land in a...for lack of a better term...awkward position-"

Sirius fell off the bed laughing. "I know where you sleep Padfoot." James threatened.

"Yeah, you probably know where Evans sleeps too!" Sirius wheezed. A pillow to the face from Remus got Sirius's attention back.

"Please continue," Remus dryly guestured.

"Well, please don't kill me Moony, but....well....we um, began to-" James fidgeted nervously.

"Kiss?" Remus asked shrilly.

"No, we hadn't made it that far." James explained. Remus visibly calmed.

"But, she froze. Her eyes became....shinier than they usually are-"

"How long have you been staring at my sister's eyes?" Remus asked suspiciously.

James gulped. "I plead the fifth."

Remus and Sirius rolled their eyes. "Anyway-" Sirius started.

"Yeah, um...she just shoved me off and ran into the house. For some reason, when she got back from La-La Land, she looked, terrified." James finished.

"I'd be terrified if I found your face that close to mine too Prongs," Sirius muttered.

"You like my sister?" Remus asked incredulously.

"First of all, _Padfoot_, this wasn't a one sided action. Second, I don't know if I like her or not."

"Uh huh." Remus said disbelievingly.

James threw his hands up in frustration and stomped to the bathroom.

"Stripes?"

"Yeah Talons?" Lily asked as indifferently as she could.

"What's the matter?" Kobe asked.

"Nothing's the matter Kobe." Lily answered shortly.

"It doesn't seem like it. Potter ran in ten minutes ago, and he looked like he'd met death along the way. Now we know that you were with him. Spill," Brittney ordered.

"Nothing's wrong Fang, don't worry about me," Lily calmed.

_'I believed that the first time, when I didn't see you throw up.'_ Brittney thought bitterly.

"Whatever," Lily mumbled. Thankfully, no one heard.

A few days later, after Logan had managed to wash the remaining cottage cheese out of her hair, the seven had gotten their letters promptly at breakfast.

"Bugger, this won't be cheap Stripes," Logan exclaimed.

"Yeah, that's gonna ruin your guys's Christmas presents Sparks," Lily said in return.

"How're you getting the money anyways? I thought your Aunt Faith was in Greece." Remus questioned.

"She gave me some m-money before s-she left. It's in a safe upstairs." Lily lied casually.

"Well, I guess we'll get your money and then head to Diagon Alley-" James began.

"No, you guys head on, I'll meet you in Flourish and Blotts in about an hour." Lily responded quickly, earning a glance from both Brittney and Remus.

The rest agreed; the aforementioned two rather grudgingly, and headed off to the Leaky Cauldron.

Lily bitterly stood there, allowing a groan of anger escape her lips. Gliding up the stairs, ignoring the basement, and walking past her own room, she headed towards Aunt Faith's room.

The door handle held an odd, yet familiar feel to it. Lily rested her forehead on the door, sighing tiredly. A fear of what might happen if she told anyone, or of what she might find, had begun eat away at her insides. _'It's just Aunt Faith's room. Get over it you weak, pathetic freak.' _She scolded. "Just here to get some money from the safe, that's it."

She opened the door a crack, and slipped her thin frame between the door and the wall. A warm, but sorrowful rush came towards her, engulfing her and bringing back things she'd never wanted to relive again.

Stumbling over to the safe, she reached out a shaking hand and twisted the knob. The thin, fine layer of dust that had gathered around the door flew back into Lily's face, causing her to cough loudly.

When the dust had settled, she grabbed the burlap sack from her pocket and shoved some gold into the bag, not looking at the paper inside. Never noticing the other picture fall to the floor; the one of her and her aunt, the day after Lily had come to live with them. Lily never saw the look of resentment, and emptiness her face had, nor her bloody, tattered clothes. But Lily did understand that she had lost her mom, and knew that she would never get the chance to take another picture with her again.

Lily tripped over one of her aunt's slippers and dropped to the bag, spilling the contents. She turned to pick up the coins that had spilled, and managed to find another photo; high in contrast to the one at the safe. "This was taken over Christmas," she whispered. Her throat tightened painfully, and the shame she'd been feeling for fifteen years seemed to multiply. An unknown rage was building up, and she knew it. "It's your fault, don't be a weak blubber-mouth."

She stole another glance at her and her aunt. A distant voice echoed in her mind...

_"LILY! WHERE'S ALL THE COOKIES?" Aunt Faith shrieked._

_"Um, I last saw them on the table!" Lily shrieked back from the living room. There was no need, they wanted a quiet Christmas as just them, a mother and daughter, or an aunt and her favorite niece, or as best friends, whatever you would call them, but Lily suspected it was all three._

_"What're you celebrating Christmas anyway? Hanukah was ages ago," Lily noted._

_"I can be dually religious," Aunt Faith defended playfully._

_Lily rolled her eyes jokingly._

_"We need the cake anyway, come on woman!" Aunt Faith hollered._

_"Oh, it's on Fogie." _

_"Bring it!"_

_"I will!"_

_"You will?"_

_"Yeah, I'm top dog!"_

_"You sure?"_

_"Yeah! Now hand me the apron!"_

_Fifteen minutes later, the two were covered in flower, and congratulating each other on the cake._

_"I'll be better than the Pillsbury Dough-boy in no time," Lily said._

_"Not before me!"_

_"You wish Auntie," Lily retorted._

_"Your right, I do!" She replied._

_There was a knock on the door, and Aunt Faith went to answer. Brittney stood on the doorstep, her head covered in a thin layer of snow. "How's it goin'" Brittney asked cautiously._

_"It's goin', but Aunt Faith's giving me a pat on the back, when we haven't even put the cake in the oven." Lily answered. "What are you doing here? I thought you were spending Christmas with your dad in __Italy_

_"Well, he found some hooker with a fancy name, and said that he couldn't do Christmas this year, and my mom was in Ireland with her family, so I was hoping you would know of a cheap hotel."_

_"Nonsense, I'll not have her spend a week and a half in some sleaze-bag motel with all the murders about, you'll stay here." Aunt Faith ordered._

_"Oh, I don't want to put you out-" Brittney began. "Just because my Dad's being an irresponsible git, doesn't mean I have to burden you guys."_

_Lily looked away sharply, clenching and unclenching her fists._

_"No, I won't have any of it, pack in your bags, you'll spend Christmas with us." _

_"Oh, thank you," Brittney said._

_Lily and Aunt Faith drug her bags up while Brittney changed into some warm, dry clothes._

_Lily walked back down the stairs, took out the pie, and set it on the drain-board to cool down._

_She turned around in time to have Aunt Faith grab her and pull her into a gigantic hug. "Merry Christmas Lily, I love you," Aunt Faith whispered into her ear, acting as though it was a secret she was only able to hear._

_A warm, tingling sensation spread out through her body at the words; no matter how much Aunt Faith would say them to her, she never missed the rush of joy she got at hearing them._

_Brittney came down, clad in a baggy shirt and shorts, a camera clutched in her hand. _

_The three settled around the Christmas tree, all eager to see what little gifts waited._

_Aunt Faith had gotten a new oven mitt with a rather interesting saying. "I touch hot stuff, and I'm not talking about the food," Lily read on the palm. She had also gotten a glass angel, two boxes of Chocolate Frogs, and the last gift, was a picture frame out of wizard silver. "I love it all you two, thanks for the gifts," Aunt Faith squealed while giving them a hug._

_Lily turned, grabbing a box from under the tree. The wrapping felt silky, almost like water beneath her fingers. After carefully removing the paper, she took to sliding her finger across the tape that held the box closed. She opened the gift. A rich golden necklace lay. Both she and Brittney gasped._

_The necklace was simple, but irresistibly stunning at the same time. A semi-short chain connected a gorgeous, crystal red heart. _

_"You always have a beautiful heart Lily, Love, Aunt Faith," Lily read silently. She slipped the chain and pendant around her neck, marveling at the beauty._

_Aunt Faith pulled her into a tight hug. Brittney took a snapshot of them as they pulled away. "This is goin' in the yearbook," Brittney yelled jovially. _

_"Go on, I've got nothing to hide," Lily called proudly. _'that's an even bigger lie'

_Aunt Faith snuck the picture away from Brittney while she slept; realizing Lily was still awake and looked at her on the couch. "I value you above my life, and I always will. Good night Lily, I love you so much." She leaned over and pulled her into another tight embrace._

_"I love you...Mom," Lily whispered. _Lily's breathing was labored as she tried not to let the tears in her eyes fall. "I let her suffer, I let her die, I'm doing this to myself, I've got nothing to be whining about." She said bitterly. _'Yeah you do.'_

"_No I don't!"_

"SHUT UP!"

A dull throbbing had erupted in her brain, completely blocking out everything but the voices. "Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up," she growled. The pain intensified.

She felt a movement and tensed up, waiting for the thing to come closer. The object flew over her head, and on to the opposite side, barely missing Lily's fist break the bureau that held all of Aunt Faith's clothes.

Airz gave an indignant hoot and flew off the shelf, while Lily hissed in pain. "You deserved it you fool."

The words were familiar, because she'd heard them so many times before, and the voice was her own. The migraine subsided suddenly, as if belittling herself made everything better. She shakily got up and wobbled over to the door, the bag of money in toe.

A wave of paranoia seemed to drown Lily, constantly having her shift her gaze from side to side in worries of someone seeing her ''display''.

The day went fine; the seven walked through the stores, ate a lunch of sundaes at Florean's, and ended their day with a glance inside Quality Quidditch Supplies.

"You alright Stripes?" Logan asked at dinner.

"Yeah, why?" Lily responded with what she hoped was nonchalance.

"You just seem kind of....out of it," Kobe answered.

"No, I'm fine, why wouldn't I be?" Lily responded.

_'I don't know that, but I know that there are a few reasons why you look emaciated.'_

"Well, you don't look like an anorexic for no reason," Brittney muttered under her breath.

Lily heard the comment, but let it slide. "Well, I'm done. You six go ahead, I'll do the dishes," she ordered.

"No, I'll help," James chimed in.

"You don't need to, you're the guests."

"Exactly."

Lily stood up and walked with James over to the sink while the others filed out to get the best spot on the couch.

"Now what's wrong with you? You look like death Evans," James questioned once they were alone.

"Quite the blunt one aren't we today?" Lily noted sarcastically.

"Don't avoid the question. You've been acting odd ever since Dumbledore at the end of last year."

"Well, I hate to burst your bubble Prince charming, but I'm not in trouble, I can take care of myself so back off." Lily snapped harshly.

James had a look of disgusted surprise as he put the dirty dishes in the sink, and slipped the clean ones into their respective places. "Sorry I asked Evans."

He then sauntered out, slamming the door so hard that it rattled Aunt Faith's old china.

A week passed, James refused to talk to Lily, and Brittney would never look Brittney in the eye. But soon, they were all in two cabs that were headed for Kings Cross.

"It feels good to go back to school," Lily sighed. _'So good to get away from that, nothing can go wrong now.'_

How wrong she was.

She and Remus were the first to haul their luggage onto the train and find a compartment. "Okay...lemme ask you something," Remus panted.

"Alright," Lily responded uncertainly.

"First, how do you tell a person you like as a friend, that you don't want to go any farther than that? And second, what's with you? You've been acting skittish all summer and it's irking the breezes outta me," Remus asked in one breath, finally pausing at grabbing a breath.

"First, you might need to talk to Logan about that, she's always good at that mushy stuff-"

"-She's the one I'm talking about, I like her as a really good friend, but she wants to go farther; but I'll talk to you about that in a bit-"

"Second," Lily continued as though he hadn't spoken. "I'm fine, how many times do I have to tell you that, I'm fine, tip top shape, everything's all push posh, nothing's going on, I'm not dieing, I'm not an anorexic, bulimic, schizophrenic or any of that, I'M FINE!" she finished loudly.

"Now that that's cleared up, help me! I really don't want to lose Logan as a friend, but, I don't want to go out with her, not with "

Logan and the rest of the group had chosen that moment to enter the carriage, so the subject was put on hold.

"Remus, why don't you help me with my other suitcase?" Lily asked in a new, bright tone.

"Sure?" Remus answered, not getting where she was going.

"Well then _come on_." Lily replied through gritted teeth. Remus blinked to show he had finally gotten what she was doing.

They got out of the compartment and Lily followed Remus to the baggage car.

"Now, lemme get this straight. Logan likes you as more than a friend. You don't. You want to tell her, but don't want to hurt her. You're asking someone with no people skills a very personal question."

"That about covers it."

"The best advices I can give....don't confront her first, and.....why is it you always ask me the questions I have no experience on answering? Um...just be honest I guess." Lily said, flustered.

"Does the ever powerful Lily not know the answer to something?" Remus asked cheekily.

"Yup, do you have a problem with that?" Lily snapped in a suddenly agitated tone.

Remus held his hands up in surrender and walked out of the baggage compartment.

The train ride was uneventful; Remus and Lily put on their prefect badges and did a lax patrol before walking in and dropping on the seats.

"This is the single most boring train ride, I have ever been on," Lily mumbled tiredly.

"Tell me about it," James responded back as he raised his arms high above his head to stretch.

"well, it's only, another six hours 'til w'ere there," Logan yawned.

"Only six hours, eh?" Kobe shot.

"Go snog your boyfriend Kobe," Logan retorted, curling up to go to sleep.

"At least I have one," Kobe snapped before heading out of the compartment.

"Harsh," Brittney whispered groggily. She placed her head back on Sirius's shoulder, and put her feet in Remus's lap. "There seems to be a pattern here, didn't she do this to you at the quidditch party last year?" Remus asked.

"Yeah, and look where it's got me."

"In that case, she can keep her feet on me any time she wants," Remus joked.

Logan rolled over sharply, trying to ignore the pain shooting through her heart and failing miserably. Lily set her strong hand, comfortingly on Logan's shoulder. It seemed as though Lily felt sorry for Logan, like she was trying to brace her for something terrible.

_'If only she knew,' _Lily thought sadly.

The train ride finally ended, and Lily saw the thestral's nervously pawing at the ground on her way up to the carriages. They eyed her warily.

The seven crawled into the hay smelling carts, each one as exhausted as the rest. "I vote we got to the Room of Adventures after dinner tomorrow," Sirius proposed.

"Sure, why not?" Brittney mumbled sleepily from his chest.

"Brittney, did you see what I did with my soccer ball over break?" Logan asked.

"I think it's in my trunk," Brittney answered.

The carriages stopped in front of the Double Doors that led to the entrance hall. "Oh, Potter, Evans, Professor Dumbledore would like a word with you in his office after the feast," McCgonagall called loudly.

_'Of course, the sorting is done, dinner is finished, and we are about to enter Dumbledore's office. The thing I've been dreading all evening, has showed up fifty thousand times faster than I wanted it to. Dammit.'_ Lily reflected annoyingly.

"Checkered almonds," McCgonagall said. The stone gargoyle made an odd sound as it shifted to let Lily and James through.

James and Lily walked in silence, their footsteps echoing along the wall.

James reached out and tentatively knocked on the oak doors. "Come in," a faint voice said.

"You wanted to see us?" Lily questioned as they took seats in front of Dumbledore's desk.

"Yes; I would like to talk to you about a dorm rearrangement-"

"Why?"

"Do you remember the glass you found last year?"

"Yes," Lily waved off. "What does this have to do with anything?"

"We found another one." Lily shut her mouth. "Look, all I'm saying, is that you two are in the greatest danger, but you two are each other's greatest protectors. So the ministry-"

"You brought Dad into this?" James pressed.

"Yes, your father requested that I move you to a more secure location of the castle not known to Lord Voldemort-"

"so move him, I'm perfectly fine where I'm at," Lily snapped bluntly. Dumbledore blinked once and continued as though she had never spoken.

"And since Lord Voldemort seems to be out for Lily because of her _gifts_-"

"Curses-" Lily interrupted.

"Then it's only simple enough to move you together, besides, it saves on space."

"Okay Professor, where are we moving then?" James questioned, eyeing Dumbledore like he had flipped his lid.

"it's at the very top of the school, I'll just show you. Would you five like to join us as well?" Dumbledore asked, facing toward the door.

"Yeah! OW!" they heard Sirius yelp. "watch it!"

"Well if you'd stop talking at random, maybe I wouldn't hit you so hard!" Brittney snapped as she, Logan, Kobe, Remus, and Sirius pulled off the invisibility cloak and set it on the coat stand.

"How is this, my fault Brittney? He asked a question, and I gave him an answer," Sirius reasoned.

"Yeah, well he wasn't supposed to know we were here ding-bat!" Logan snarled.

"Mooney, Help me!" Sirius whined at the werewolf, who had his hand conveniently placed over his mouth to hide his snickering.

"Yes, Professor Dumbledore, we would gladly join you," Remus whispered hoarsely and soon was engulfed in a laughing fit.

"Just go." Lily snapped.

"As you wish," and Dumbledore led them up four sets of stairs, two corridors, and finally stopped at a portrait of Magma the Midget.

"Shrimp," Dumbledore said regally and the portrait sneered at him, making a very rude hand gesture as the picture passed by the group's faces. Kobe snorted.

There was a small hallway behind the portrait that led to a very nice common room; one that looked exactly like Gryffindor's.

They walked up a winding staircase, and into another hallway. "There is one room on the left, and one on the right, I'm going to let you decide who gets what. The bathroom connects to both rooms," Dumbledore instructed.

"Okay, we have that, is there anything else?" Lily asked rudely.

"No, classes start at normal time tomorrow, everything is the same," Dumbledore finished, and bowed himself out of the room

"What was that all about? You were a complete arse back there?" James hollered at Lily once the rest had left.

"Nothing," Lily growled acidly.

"So get a happy moment every once in a while and stop snapping at everyone!" James yelled and stalked off into the window room.

"I'm going to the Room of Adventures, tomorrow. POTTER! DON'T EVEN _THINK_ OF TAKING THAT DORM ROOM!"

Yeah...um....I'm not sure on the quality of the chapter, but I'm sorry if it wasn't up to par. I'm working on another type of story, but just a random one...I might post it somewhere, and I'll give you the link if I do, so, please review. I'll love you forever!


	18. Prideful fight, upcoming defeat

1Lily stormed into the dorm and stared at James and the bed he was currently lying on. "This is my room!" she repeated stubbornly.

"It is? Well then why am I on my bed, in your room?" James asked innocently.

"It's my bed, in my room," Lily snapped. "And I'm-"

"Just going to have to share it then," James finished sweetly. "I'll pack in your things tomorrow."

Lily waved him off and walked out of the room she and James were in, and into the opposite dorm room. Muttering the charm, she shrank the bed to fit in her hand and walked back into their room.

"You do realize that we're not supposed to share a room, right?" James asked uncertainly.

"Uh huh," Lily replied. "But since when should I care?"

"I'm just giving you a fair warning," James waved his hands in surrender. "But I get the first shower." With that, he picked up some fresh clothes from his trunk, and walked in the small bathroom.

It had been almost fifteen minutes, and James opened the door. "Isn't it, odd to not wear a shirt?" Lily asked, perturbed. He walked out in his pajama pants, leaving his entire upper torso in plain view for her.

"I personally think it's more odd to wear a shirt." he said casually, hanging a button up shirt he wore as a crude version of a robe on the bed-post. "Besides, I don't think you mind."

"I do to!" Lily defended. _'Not true. I think it should be illegal for him to wear a shirt.'_

"Uh huh, sure," James smirked devilishly and crawled into bed, heaving a pleasant sigh. One arm, he cradled his head with and the other arm he had outstretched, perpendicular to his body.

Lily stared at him, a strong pang of loneliness shooting through her body. She shook her head and silently padded her way into the bathroom.

She walked out almost a half hour later, clad in baggy pants and a large tee-shirt, though she didn't go to bed straight away. Instead, she stared at James, who had his face turned toward her, one knee slightly bent and hanging off the bed. His eyelids were closed, hiding the usual spark in his eyes, and the corners of his lips were ever so slightly turned up. Lily was suddenly extremely jealous of him; the way he was always so relaxed, or the way he could tell anyone anything he wanted and not worry about what they might think. How he could carry himself so confidently and gracefully.

She gave one last wistful glance, wishing she could curl up next to him, lay her head on his chest and forget everything. _'But no, my life's just too miserable to have anything good happen.' _she remembered bitterly. Lily slid under the warm comforter, turned away from James, rolled into a ball, and let a nightmarish slumber make its way into the room. She didn't realize the mistake she made by falling asleep; it required a family reunion.

_A crumbling street, littered in decaying corpses and fallen house debris. Lily walked down the narrow path uncertainly, avoiding small fires, and observing the chaos. Her eyes cast all around, seeing the lives lost, and the bodies that remained._

_Then in a jerk somewhere behind her naval, and she was in a black emptiness; save for a glowing light on the millions of bodies she walked by, in an attempt to get to the end of the line. They hung, heads at an odd angle, all with eyes that glowered on her. There were faces she didn't know, faces she'd seen, and faces she'd gotten too close to. Kobe and Logan were on her right and left. "Why did you let us die?" Logan asked softly, though her pitiless eyes divulged anger. _

_"Why didn't you save us?" Kobe followed, her face twisted into a furious scowl._

_"I-I d-did-didn't know," Lily stammered timidly._

_"They were right," Logan whispered._

_"Yes They were." _

_Lily hurried by them, her eyes slightly shiny. Next in line, were Sirius and James._

_"Some friend you were, you let us die, and you didn't try to stop it," Sirius sneered._

_"You were supposed to be able to be trusted. You lied-"_

_"I-I d-didn't l-l-lie!" Lily croaked. They glared at her._

_"They were right, she couldn't be trusted." James mused._

_"Too right They were. But we'll make sure no one falls for the same mistake ever, again," James threatened acidly. Lily ran, stopping and nearly vomiting at the looks Brittney and Remus gave her. Her two closest friends; no trace of sympathy, just hatred, bitterness, and rage. She had let them down. "They were right. You were the mis-" Remus whispered dangerously._

_"DON'T FINISH THAT! DON'T-don't you dare finish that sentence!" Lily roared. _

_"They told us she would have a temper. She's the one who was stupid enough to give us up. SHE WAS THE ONE WHO LET US SUFFER!" Brittney screamed. _

_"SHUT UP! JUST SHUT UP! DON'T TALK ABOUT THINGS YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND, BECAUSE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING!" Lily yelled, covering her ears. She loped ahead, still trying to get the yelling and screaming from the past to stop. Then she saw a face. Aunt Faith hung in front of her. "You promised you would help me. They knew you wouldn't. THEY TOLD ME YOU WOULDN'T! And still I didn't believe what They said. I was wrong. They were right-"_

_"No-no. You don't mean that-" Lily pleaded. She panicked. The look Aunt Faith was giving her, showed an unadulterated, indescribable hate. All was directed at Lily; she was to blame._

_"You were the mistake that should have never happened."_

_Lily stumbled backwards. "No." Terror she'd become familiar with, grew with each step, to the point where she felt like throwing up._

_"Lily," James sneered, an evil smile upon his face, and hazel eyes down to slits. _

_"Lily..."_

"LILY!"

Lily's eyes shot open, and she gave a long gasp of air. She groaned, wrapping her arms around her stomach. Guilt peaked; Lily couldn't get the image of Aunt Faith out of her head. It seemed engraved into her eyelids.

She rolled out of bed, gagging violently. The witch stumbled into the bathroom, barely managing to make it to the toilet before vomiting heavily. Lily felt a comforting, masculine presence behind her as James wrapped one arm around her waist, and the other on the wall to steady themselves.

Lily finally quit dry-heaving, pausing to relax into James._'They'll see me being weak.' _The thought brought Lily back to her senses; she shrugged James roughly off of her, and turned to the sink to brush her teeth.

Five minutes later, she grabbed her cloak, and had her hand on the door handle. "Where're you going?" James questioned sharply.

"Out." She replied shortly, slamming the door. She walked out of the common room, and wove her way through the intricate passages of Hogwarts, until she reached the portrait she wanted. "Porskoff."

The door opened, letting her slip in the crack it made. Lily walked to the shower stall, running and landing on the direct spot and sliding through the door. She landed on the large trampoline and leapt to the room that held the gymnastics, and martial arts equipment. "You were being stupid."

Lily walked to the punching bag, throwing everything she had with all the energy her body held. Punches, kicks, sudos; every last one pulling her already waning power down.

She pulled a particularly hard right hook that would of drove through a human skull and come out the other side, and her forearm snapped with a loud crack. She started hissing, but stopped short. _'If your going to prove you're the best, you'll have to quit whining like a wimp.' _

She hurriedly dropped her arm, jogging through the doors that led to the huge soccer field. "Run," Lily whispered. It started off as a small trot, quickly turning into a full sprint, back and forth across the rather large field long after a distance runner would have collapsed unconscious. Her legs collapsed on her, mid-run, making her fall and tumble to a stop on the dewy grass. One of Lily's arms fell in front of her, and the other arm was bent so her emerald eyes faced the side of her hand. She watched one hand, and felt the other curl into a tight fist, soon splitting tiny, moon-shaped cuts in the meaty palm._'You stopped. They're going to see you giving up. They're going to get you, you pathetic weakling.' _

"No-get up-have to get-up," She panted heavily to her exhausted body, her breath causing the blades of grass to sway. "Can't let Them see us being stupid."

Fighting her body's protests, Lily heaved herself up from the ground and back to the locker room. She showered slowly, pulling a pair of new, clean pajamas from a bin languidly. "Come on, you pathetic fool."

Her way to the common room was irritatingly slow, and Lily's mouth had to wait for a few yawns to pass before being able to barely whisper the password so she could crawl in. "Get up there freak. Move, Petunia got a lot, and she could still crawl up," Lily hissed wildly.

The witch's body seemed to take that as a personal insult, because she moved quite a bit faster, though her walk was still ungraceful.

Exhaustion like she'd never known crept up on her, her eyelids wouldn't stay open. Lily's feet shuffled to the bed and was fast asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow...the problem was...the pillow wasn't hers.

"Wha-?" James woke with a start, unaccustomed to the new weight on the left side of the bed. His eyelids flew open, his hazel eyes intensely searching the prone, feminine figure that was Lily Evans. She lay on her back, head turned toward him. One arm was down, and the other was splayed across her abdomen, bent at an unnatural angle. James reached out a rough hand and lightly ran his fingers along her forearm, listening to her gasp as he did this.

James turned both eyes to her face. Lily's eyes fluttered open for a moment before shutting tight once more. "Evans?"

"Hm?" Lily mumbled back, half asleep.

"Let's get you to bed so you can sleep," James whispered.

"No. Can't sleep. Nightmares come-" Lily burst out, though her eyes were still closed shut.

James slid one arm around her shoulders, and the other around the back of her knees. "What's in the nightmares?" He asked once he set her on the top of the comforter.

"Death...everywhere," She trailed off, and her speaking was replaced by shallow, uneven breath as she went back to a disturbed sleep.

James grabbed his wand from the bed side table, knocking his glasses onto the floor in the process. He pointed his wand at her arm. "Ferula," He mumbled, and a cast wrapped itself around her broken limb.

He crawled back to bed, kicking his spectacles all over the place in the process. "To hell with them," He grumbled, and crawled back under the covers, falling into a riddled sleep himself.

Lily awoke, her body aching, and unable to move her right forearm. "Potter?"

"Yes?" His voice taunted while he pulled on a white tee shirt over his head.

"Where's the damn aspirin?" Lily groaned, stumbling out of bed. She grasped the bed post to steady herself, and vaguely noticed James watch her, seemingly preparing himself to catch her if necessary.

She tripped her way to the bathroom and stepped into a blistering hot shower, letting the water run in rivers down her sore body. "It's your own fault your out of shape."

She walked out, clad in her school uniform to find James had already gone to breakfast. She followed suit, finding him with Brittney, Remus, Kobe, Logan, and Sirius; all of whom were stuffing their faces with gusto. "Didn't even wait? You guys must have been hungry," Lily joked.

"'Ere 'ust 'etting a 'ead spart!" Sirius said indignantly, or as indignantly as he could manage with pieces of waffles flying from his mouth.

"Uh huh," Lily sat down between Brittney and Logan, piling fruit onto her plate and inhaling the food quickly.

Kobe began to fake sob. "Another ten months with...Cardel."

"You can't win 'em all sis," Logan said sympathetically.

Brittney giggled. Lily jokingly rolled her eyes and the group walked down to the dungeons for their first lesson of sixth year.

"Look here boys, we have seven girls heading to potions class," Lucius Malfoy taunted to the Marauders and the C.Y.

"Padfoot, look, the gremlins attempt to protect themselves by puffing up," James whispered loudly, while Remus snickered.

"It's an old defensive trick, I've seen it many times on primitive arses," Sirius responded, his gray eyes fixed on Malfoy's steely blue ones.

"Now Sirius, what have I told you about picking on little girls?" Brittney reprimanded. Sirius held his head in mock shame.

"Shut your mouth mudblood!" The new seventh year, Goyle growled.

"Go ride a bike you hermaphrodite" Lily snapped.

Neither Malfoy, Nott, or Goyle had a remark to this, so Lily shoved them out of the way and stalked into potions, her temper flaring up rapidly. "Don't lose control, don't lose control, don't lose control," Lily muttered under her breath, making sure no one heard her.

Lily's chant was cut short by the wailing stench of someone who hadn't showered in weeks. "Cardel's here," Logan whispered to Kobe, and Kobe pinched her nose in recognition.

"And Cardinky's gone to the chalkboard, he's, dear lord is he, yes he's writing on papers, probably putting a failing grade on a certain Prongs's sleeping draft essay," Sirius commented throatily, like a cheap game show host.

"Nah, if you look at the scribbles on the top right, you'll see that those hieroglyphics decipher into the name Sirius Black," Remus muttered into Sirius's ear. Sirius gave a look of indignation, and then smiled.

"Yeah, your right," Padfoot snorted.

"I see some of you-" Cardel threw Herbert Oglen a nasty look. "-Haven't taken the time to refill your potions kit. Well that ruins our plans Oglen. I suppose I'll just have to assign you a three scroll paper on the effects of monkshood."

"Three scrolls?" Brittney said incredulously. "I can write that in half a sentence!"

"Then you're going to have a problem writing this paper Kaind," Cardel responded coolly. Brittney seethed, but bit back a retort.

Potions and the morning passed painfully slow for Lily, and all she wanted to do was go back to the Room of Adventures. "You finishing that sis?" Remus asked Lily at lunch, referring to her barely touched Shepard's pie.

"Take it Remus, I'm not hungry," Lily responded. Remus grabbed her plate and dug in with gusto. _'Aunt Faith loved Shepard's pie. She would make it every Sunday.'_

_"Well it's your own stupid fault Voldemort murdered her."_

_'It doesn't change the fact that I miss her.'_

_"It does mean you can't whine incessantly about her. You screwed up your life, and you have no one to blame but yourself, got it?"_

_'Got it._'

James's waving hand swam into her vision. "Evans? You zoned out on us for a minute."

"I'm fine," Lily snapped, suddenly furious. "Quit babying me. I can take care of myself."

James snorted at the same time Brittney did. "I'll start believing it when you start acting like it," Brittney muttered soundlessly. "What happened to your arm?"

Lily looked down at the limb she hadn't used all morning. "I don't know what I did," Lily lied, feigning shock. "I'll just head to the hospital wing and get it fixed."

With that, she gracefully slid from her seat, and did a subdued form of stomping out of the Great Hall. "She's got problems mate," Sirius said to James.

"Yeah, but she won't tell us what they are."

Lily had forgotten about her arm and the pain it caused, but it now spread through her body, tenfold. "Your own fault, it's your own fault, it's your own fault," she hissed. She reached out her good hand and knocked on the door to the hospital wing. "I'm coming, I'm c-" Madam Pomfrey's voice caught in her throat when she swung the heavy door open and took notice of Lily's oddly bent arm. "What happened to you dear?"

"I fell."

"Oh, you fell down the stairs on the second floor didn't you?"

"Y-yeah, curse them stairs," Lily agreed. Madam Pomfrey led her to a hospital bed at the far end of the wing, and told her to lie down. She briskly walked back a few minutes later, some potion or other clutched in her fingers. "Drink this," she ordered maternally.

Lily eyed the potion warily. "Is this approved by the BPI?"

"The British Potion Inspectors have in fact, examined every bottle of bone healing tonic I have and have passed me with flying colors," Madam Pomfrey bristled. She thrust the bottle into Lily's hand, telling her to drink all of it.

Lily cautiously sniffed the potion and downed it in one gulp. "Bleurgh!" she coughed, though she felt the bone already mending seamlessly.

"You seem to be doing better already!" Madam Pomfrey exclaimed an hour later. Lily's arm had healed completely and now, but she didn't feel like moving from the feather bed and listening to Madam Pomfrey bustle about like a mother hen. It was relaxing to have someone to care for you when you were sick or injured. _"You're only wanting what you don't deserve."_

_'I just want to remember when I was eleven and Aunt Faith would take care of me when I had the flu.'_

_"Yes, but you were just like the thing you hated most and brushed her off like some insignificant speck of dust."_

_'People make mistakes.'_

_"Yes They did."_ Another voice sounded. The nurse had long since gone to her office to read on the laughing serum, and Lily was now alone. The last statement had a hidden meaning to her and struck hard. "Who's there?" she called softly. Her own vocalization echoed down the stone hall endlessly.

"Your becoming paranoid again." she said angrily, and got out of her bed reluctantly. Lily slipped out of the wing. "Converto threaderium," she whispered, and her hospital clothes morphed into a school uniform. She concentrated and mentally brought her wand to her from its earlier resting place on the bedside cabinet.

"Stripes!" Lily heard Kobe holler from the end of the hall. Lily quickly put on a front that betrayed none of her real feelings

"You rang?" Lily asked slowly and purposely.

"Come on, we set off a load of dungbombs in the dungeons and now we have the rest of the day off!" Logan chirped proudly, skipping girlishly toward the redhead.

Lily rolled her eyes playfully. "Perfect," she said sarcastically.

"Come on, let's go to the Room of Adventures," James exclaimed.

Lily made no protest, following the rest of her friends on their way to their destination. "Porskoff," Remus said, right as Sirius opened his mouth. Sirius gave his friend a look of mock anger.

"How rude," James said, clasping a strong hand on Sirius's shoulder.

"Finally, someone sees the true Remus Lupin!" Brittney exclaimed playfully.

"Hardy har, har," Remus responded dryly. They walked in, the locker room being the first thing they saw. Brittney, James, and Remus went to the pool, while Lily, Kobe, Logan, and Sirius went to the martial arts room.

The four went down the slide, each landing with a bounce on the trampoline room and tripping their way to the adjacent chamber. "Who feels like sparring?" Logan asked.

There was a stiff pause. "I will," Lily said after a long moment.

With that, Lily and Logan began sparring, or rather, Logan was beating the mickey out of Lily for the first time ever. "Stop. What's going on with you Lily? I've never beaten you at this before." Logan said.

"You're just getting too good for me," Lily replied, trying to brush the subject off.

"Bullocks! You're different, well, you're acting _really _different," Kobe joined in.

_"You're letting them see you vulnerable."_

_'I'm not trying!'_

_"Your not trying hard enough wimp. They're going to see you losing. You're going to _let_ Them see you fail?"_

Lily's thought was interrupted. "Let me try, she might just be having an off moment," Kobe reasoned. That theory went out the window. Kobe had Lily on the floor within two minutes, due to a leg sweep and a leg pinning her to the ground.

The same sort of defeat went with Sirius, who'd never had an ounce of self-defense training in his life; though he didn't really need it. The way he carried himself and the strength he had in his body was very evident that one didn't want to be on the receiving end of a hit from him.

"Ok, something _is_ seriously wrong with you today," Sirius finished, backing up and holding out an ignored hand to help Lily off the ground.

"For the last time, nothing is wrong. I am in perfectly good condition. Quit bugging me on this," Lily snapped. _'They're just trying to help.'_

_"Letting them help you shows that you're too weak to handle anything on your own. Are you just going to let Them see you fail?_"

Again, the thought was pushed from the forepart of her mind. Brittney, James, and Remus had all made their debut in the room. "Me turn, me turn!" James yelped boyishly. That fight, again, didn't turn out well. Lily was on her belly, James hand clasped around her neck, and she was both panting and shaking; all of this happened within five minutes. "Maybe you should take a break, you're looking pretty worn out."

"Get off me." She snarled in response. Lily pulled her body up yet again. "Come on Brittney."

"I don't think I should, you look tired," Brittney replied quietly.

"I said come on."

"You need to rest."

"I said come on!" Lily yelled. The chattering room went eerily quiet. Lily's breathing was slightly labored. "If I say that I'm ok, don't undermine me," she growled.

"I don't think you're thinking clearly Lily, you need to rest," Brittney said firmly.

"Well I think you're afraid you'll lose." Lily sneered.

"Lily, that's not cool, and completely untrue," Kobe responded, oblivious to Brittney whirling around with a bright, dangerous glint in her brown eyes.

"No, she's said her piece, I'll say mine in due time," Brittney growled to Kobe and Logan, who was just opening her mouth.

"So come on," Lily leered at her. A new spark shown in both their eyes; both had their competitive edges pushed, and neither would back down.

Lily was the first to act. She threw a left jab that Brittney blocked and countered with a duck and an elbow to the gut. "What's with you Lily? You've been-" she ducked a roundhouse kick. "-acting so much different since the end of last-" she jumped a leg sweep. "-year."

"Nothing. Nothing is wrong, nothing will ever be wrong, nothing ever was wrong!" Lily yelled angrily. "I am fine! Quit thinking something's wrong with me, because there _isn't_!"

Lily swept Brittney's legs out from under her, and made to drive the heel of her foot down on Brittney's throat, though Brittney rolled away.

It went on, and on. Ten minutes went by and nothing had changed. Brittney was now sweaty and panting, and Lily looked almost ready to pass out. Sweat was falling freely down her lithe body, and her limbs were shaky.

"I think we should stop Lily, I'm not going to tell you again," Brittney snapped, finally reaching her breaking point.

"I'm not done yet!" Lily snarled in reply. "We'll stop when I say we'll stop, because I'm going to prove to Them that there's nothing wrong with me."

"What's the matter with you? Can't you hear yourself? Did Mum not give you an extra birthday present this year or what?"

Lily looked up. Her teeth were bared in an almost canine-like way, her body tensed, and her eyes darkened to a deep, forest green. She threw a hook, then a series of kicks, and finally threw Brittney down onto the ground with a loud 'flump'.

"You don't feel anger like I do. I know it, and you know it. You don't feel torment inside you that fills to the bursting point. You don't wake up and dread who you are do you? Don't tell me that I should feel tired, or that I should rest, because if I can still breath, then I'm doing pretty damn well. Don't you ever, _ever_, tell me what to do. Do I make myself clear?" She hissed acidly, her voice at a dangerously low octave. "Do I _make. Myself. Clear?_" Her foot was planted firmly on Brittney's throat, increasing pressure with every second she didn't answer.

"C-crystal," Brittney finally spat back. Lily removed her foot, her hands clenching and unclenching, as though in restraint of placing them around her neck, or squeezing them together until they bled; Lily chose the latter. The witch turned swiftly, stopping at the door for a moment.

"Just so you know, my mother _never_, got me a birthday present." With that, she walked out, slamming the door so hard that the hinges rattled. _'I won't let them see me fail.'_

"I'm going after her, you guys stay here and make sure Kaind's ok," James told them.

"Maybe I should go too, you know, incase she has another fit," Sirius offered.

"Nah, I'm a big boy," James said firmly. He opened the same door Lily had gone through, and followed the stomping lope Lily made. The sounds became distant quickly, like she knew he would follow her.

He reached the end of the long hall, which ended near the picture of Magma the Midget. "Evans!" He yelled into the empty hall, hearing his echo, knowing she wouldn't answer. "EVANS!"

His masculine voice was met with silence.

_"WHAT IN GOD'S NAME WERE YOU THINKING? 'Don't dread who you are'? That's only going to think that there _is_ something wrong you twit. How could you be so stupid? They're going to know, They know everything, every time you don't get a hundred percent, every time you don't come first, every moment of everyday, They _will _see."_

_'I didn't mean to!'_

_"You still did, you mi-"_

"Shut up!" Lily yelled. The quidditch pitch echoed her plea. She stopped at the front entrance of the field. "Shut up!"

She gave a small jump, and started sprinting around the large field. "One lap, two laps, three laps..." The list went on. She stopped after nearly a mile of straight, full-speed sprinting. She was panting heavily, and her body barely stood itself up. _'I hurt my best friend. I hurt her.'_

_"And you deserve the rejection you'll get for doing so."_

_'I screwed up.'_

_"And you're going to get punished for every bit of it."_

_'I didn't mean to.' _ Her mind panicked.

_"Doesn't change the fact. You screwed up, and now you're going to pay for it."_

_'I should go apologize. Yes, that's what-'_

_"And have her laugh at you for being weak and giving in? Do you think she wants to be friends with a whiner...one like you?"_

_'I guess not.'_

_"Then get with the program. You're already a selfish brat, you wouldn't want to show that you're really only a weak, pathetic fool."_

_'No, no one would want me to be weak.'_

_"Good, you're finally realizing your standing in life."_

It was late, very late, Lily assumed, as she had to sneak past Professor Cardel in the Entrance Hall Flitwick in the charms corridor, and McGonagall on the seventh floor; not to mention the countless numbers it seemed, of zit-faced, nose wiping prefects; save herself and Remus. "Shrimp," Lily whispered to Magma the Midget, repeating the same rude gesture of the hand that she had received from the portrait.

Lily didn't even go up to the bedroom, she merely sat down on the couch, put her head on the back of the seat, and fell into a light, disturbed sleep.

_She was still walking along that same ruined road, viewing the same bodies, and the same rubble. Lily reached out a strong hand to lift a piece of wood from a child, and a mist moved to blind her, removing it's swirling to show a different landscape. She was walking along the same narrow, lit path, staring at the same dead, angry faces._

_"H-h-hello?" Lily called out softly. The snap of the fires under the bodies hissed their reply. '_Even the fires hate me.'

_"Why didn't you save us?" A muggle asked. _

_"I don't even know you," Lily replied._

_"How come you didn't help?"_

_"Why were you so greedy?" another voice questioned._

_"I'm not greedy!" Lily snapped. _

_"Then why are you so rich?" Lily looked at him strangely. The road sped along, 'til it reached a dead end. She saw herself sitting on a high, marble pedestal with thousands of billions of currency in jewels and gold. Her face had an evil, snide look, and she watched as the figure that was and at the same time wasn't her. The two looked the same, but there were two completely different personalities. _

_"You fool." James whispered behind her._

_"Insolent idiot..." Sirius followed._

_"You hurt me, all I did was try and help," Brittney snarled._

_"I didn't want you to th-" Lily tried, and failed miserably, to defend her stance._

_"I don't want to hear your excuses. No one has, no one will." Brittney finished, leaving Lily in a defeated silence._

_The scene changed somewhat, again. Lily was still along the same path, seeing the same bodies, but at the same time, it was completely different. The faces were smiling slightly, and the bitterness they held toward Lily seemed to have diminished. They looked at her with a certain degree of admiration and respect. The road moved forward, and she saw no Remus, or Sirius, or Brittney, or Kobe or Logan. She saw James, and she realized with some surprise, that right next to him, was her. _

_"Why are you dead?" Lily asked the hanging corpse of James. _

_"I chose this, for you."_

_"Why?"_

_"You'll find out, if you choose correctly."_

_A dull pain erupted through Lily's head, swallowing all coherent thought with each wave of anguish. A thud slammed into Lily's ribs, removing her of all breath. _

_"You fool!" a distant voice shouted. There was another slam into her stomach, and Lily went to her knees. She heard a distant, panicked screaming, somewhat faint at first, but growing louder every second._

The witch opened her green eyes to meet James's own powerful, hazel ones. She was on the stone floor, covered in a cold sweat, her head ached, as did her ribs; her body trembled, and James's strong hands were clasped around her upper arms, pinning her to the floor.

Lily shut her eyes tightly, and wheezed. "Evans," James started uncertainly. He was met with a cough and a violent gag. "Come on, back to the world of reality."

But her stomach wouldn't hear of talk, it wanted to expel something other than words. The problem was that there was nothing to expel. James broke his iron grip from Lily, and watched worriedly as she rolled over and dry heaved fiercely.

Lily wiped her mouth on the shaking sleeve of her robe. Her head was dizzy, though she could make out James hand rubbing her back softly. She shrugged him off, and wobbly stood. "I have to go."

She left him there, on the floor. A look of disgusted surprise was clearly imprinted on his handsome face. His eyes were slightly shiny, but with a slowly increasing amount of anger. It took quite a bit to get him angry, but when he did, he didn't stop until his anger was completely out. He stood slowly, walking over to the fireplace and slamming his fist on the wood mantle. He broke the mantle in half.

Lily walked to the Room of Adventures. _"YOU WERE SO STUPID! You let yourself get pinned by him? Do you realize how badly he can and will hurt you? Did you not see the strength in him?"_

_'I didn't even know he was there!'_

_"You've grown incompetent. You're going to let something slip that you don't want to."_

Lily opened the portrait, and walked into the locker room. She lay down on one of the benches and waited for morning to come.

She didn't realize that the screaming in her dream was her own.

The witch awoke, her body stiff from the bench. There were new cuts from her fingernails in her palm and dried blood on her hand. Lily looked at the clock on the wall. "Crap, I'm going to be late for Herbology," she groaned. She irritably ran a hand through her hair. "And I don't even feel like getting up. Come on, get up. Petunia could." Her body once again, responded to that comment angrily and Lily found herself showered, cleaned, and presentable, all in under fifteen minutes.

She stumbled out of the chamber. Lily had always loved the passing between classes. They were one of the few precious moments when she wanted to be anonymous. Of course she liked to outdo people, to prove to them that she was worthy, it was almost engraned into her body. But there were times in every persons life when they just wanted to blend.

Lily made it to Greenhouse seven before the final bell, but the only spot left was next to Hufflepuff Jerrold Speffclock, the school antagonist. Lily reluctantly took a seat next to him, setting her bag on the floor unceremoniously. "Hello, I take it you're the redhead quidditch player who won Slytherin last year in the Cup."

"First off, my name is Lily Evans. Second, I didn't _win_ Slytherin, they're not a prize I'd be willing to go for. We beat Slytherin," Lily answered coldly.

"Well...I was only trying to make conversation!" Jerrold said indignantly.

"You're not doing yourself any favors Speffclock."

"Who said I wanted to do myself any favors?" Jerrold sneered.

"Your hand."

The young wizard shut his mouth, and left her alone. "Morning class!" Professor Sprout whistled as she walked in the door.

"Good morning Professor!" Sadie Sakelson replied energetically. The rest of the class only groaned.

The day passed even slower than usual. Lily barely scraped an Acceptable on her dissection of a Huffelapump, added too much newt eye to her potion, and failed her Charms paper. "You're doing this yourself, don't start complaining."

She'd walked into the Great hall for dinner that evening, sitting down a fair distance from where the Marauders and the C.Y., and not making any sort of contact that would suggest she knew any of them.

Lily sat down, inhaled her food with a record-breaking speed, and walked out again. "She wasn't even in here ten minutes," Remus whispered. "I'm worried about her."

"I'm not worried." Sirius said darkly.

"All the same, she's not herself-" James started.

"-And she's got no problem denying that." Sirius finished.

Lily was in the library, due to lack of something better to entertain her in the half-hour until Transfiguration. She merely walked over to a section, picked out a book, not caring what it was, and began to read in a secluded corner. "Why did I have to find the one of Snorkback dissection?" Lily asked rhetorically. However, she did not get up to get herself a new book. She was left with the book, her very slightly disheveled appearance, and each side of her mind.

_'You should apologize to Brittney, she just wanted to help; that is part of the friend's job description.'_

_"No! Why do that and admit defeat? You think she wants a friend who'll give up first? Does she want someone who gives in before the other?"_

_'No...but does she want a friend that does that and still think she's in the right?'_

_"Who would you rather have? A weakling like you want to become? Or someone who you can depend on?"_

Lily thought for a while. _'The second.'_

_"Good, now get these thoughts of stupidity and weakness out of your mind, and get to class."_

The first bell rang, releasing Lily from her book induced stupor. She walked quickly out of the library, and into the hall of swarming students, hoping against hope to blend in, and never stand out again.

I hope this chapter is as "good" as previous ones...I'm not sure if this chapter is as long as the others, due to my new word processor, but I hope it meets your standards. OH! Before I forget, I have discovered the story's theme song! cheesy hero music plays it is called "Open Wounds," by Skillet. (Of course that's the name of the song, or it wouldn't be the theme song for the story.) I'm hoping that you guys aren't so angry, either with the quality or quantity of the chapter, or for the drama, so I apologize if you don't like it. I've had a lot of crap going on, and I've been really, really busy, but with summer comin', I hope to get the chapters out with a bit more efficiency. Oh, another thing, check my bio for a wacky idea for a story, that is a lot better than I describe it there. Just answer in your reviews please.

Lastly, I have a question from one reviewer, SaberBlade700: Who did you hear the story from? You reviewed and I've been curious.

Spread the wealth...in that little button at the bottom of the screen...the one with the writing, "Submit review". . . . 


	19. Oh no

Lily walked into Transfiguration, taking a seat in the very front of the class and as far away as she could get from the Marauders and C.Y.

"Just shut up," She mumbled to herself. She had a air of diminished authority about her; like one who was held in high regard, and then had their status lowered dramatically. She sat with her head held high, but her eyes were those of someone who had been long harassed.

"Hello class. As a start, I'd like to remind certain members of us-" McGonagall cast Sirius a look. "-That hanging a certain Slytherin's personal effects along the ceiling in the Entrance Hall is worthy of detention for a week and ten points from your house."

"Well you can't deny that hanging the bloke's tighty-whitey's was rather ingenious, if we do say so ourselves," Sirius stated proudly.

"Mr. Malfoy was not amused."

"What's he going to do? Flash us his pasty legs and blind us while singing the school song?" James said loudly. The class guffawed.

"That's quite enough. Five more points from Gryffindor. Each. And you'll join me in here for a bit of office tidying," McGonagall clicked at the two Marauders. When her front was to the board, James and Sirius exchanged glances and high-fives.

"That was mean what you said back there-" Kobe started.

"But it was pretty funny," Logan finished.

Brittney stayed silent, sometimes casting glances at the redhead in the front of the class. Lily sat with her body straight, and her head parallel to the floor, but she gave defeated sighs often, and her eyes were downcast. Lily-Brittney noticed- had a tendency to clench her hands together until the knuckles were white, and sometimes there was blood dripping down on her palms.

Lily hadn't said a word to anyone all morning. She had so much to tell, to Brittney and James especially, but didn't have a clue to go about it in what the tougher half of her mind would approve of. So she sat quietly, working with a bookworm diligence, and when the bell rang, she was the first one out of the door, and hid until the path to the Room of Adventures was deserted.

She walked into the room, and sat down on the bench, sighing heavily. "I want to apologize. It's the right thing to do."

_"NO! I told you not to speak like that!"_

"I've got nothing to lose."

_"How about your pride? How about your dignity? What if she rejects you in front of everyone else? What if she hits you and then you're on your knees while she laughs? What if Logan, Kobe, James, Sirius and Remus all find something about you while you start blubbering like an idiot? What then?"_

"What if she says yes?"

_"What if she says no?"_

Lily couldn't come up with an answer. "Then she says no."

_"So you're going to let Them see you weak for something that has a fifty percent chance of failing?"_

Lily sighed again, putting her head in her hands. The guilt gnawed at her relentlessly. "I guess we'll find out."

Her tone left no room for argument, but Lily still sensed half of her brain waiting on the edge, waiting for the perfect time to strike her down. And Lily had a feeling that the next time the two halves battled, the side she hated most would be the one that was victorious.

She walked to the gymnastics room, and began to spar fiercely with the punching bag. Hours later, when she thought the sun was finally beginning to rise, was when she slid her body down the wall, bringing her knees to her chest, laying her slightly purple dappled arms rest on them, as her head lay down for a light, light doze.

A great rumbling in her stomach caused her sore eyes to open. She groaned. "Up, get up, have to get up."

Lily's body put up a fight. Her muscles had almost completely seized-up; her spine was stiff from lack of movement and the position it was in, and her lungs felt funny from being confined. She got up slowly.

The shower managed to make it so her figure could function with minimal amounts of noticeable trouble. She cleaned out the slits her nails made in her palm, getting some sort of twisted relief at the hurt it created. "You deserve it."

She put on her shirt, vest, tie and slacks on slowly, going over her frame to make sure every part was immaculate and revealed anything that could hint at what she did. Before she got to the door, she paused. Lily inhaled a deep breath. _'Just keep quiet. Keep silent and this will all blow over pretty soon.'_

_"I can't wait to watch you realize which side of your mind was right."_

_'Just apologize and everything will be okay.'_

One last look to make sure everything was in its place, Lily opened the portrait entrance to the Room of Adventures and slipped into the mass of students on their ways to class.

"Come on you lumps!" Sirius chirped to the dorm room.

"Padfoot." Remus grunted from his pillow.

"Yes?"

"Go away."

"But then I don't get to see your bed-head dear Moony," Sirius feigned shock.

"Prongs has one twenty-four seven, go stare at his bed-head and leave me in peace," Remus's muffled voice snapped.

"Someone's on their monthly visit," Sirius remarked before stepping out of the dorm and going to the common room.

James meanwhile, was on the sofa in his and Lily's common room. He mulled over the events that had been happening, since summer he guessed. First, there was Lily backing up-terrified-when they'd kissed . Second was her very slight change in personality when he and the rest of the group came to visit her. She was subdued, and at the same time liable to explode. Then there was the time he'd almost got to snog her. If possible, she looked even more scared than in the library-he often comically wondered if he had something on his face when the two were in that predicament. She snapped at everyone now, and she'd kicked the crap out of Brittney last night because of Brittney wanting to know what was wrong.

"Prongs?" Sirius asked from the portrait entrance to the common room.

"Yeah mate?"

"Don't look so serious; it doesn't become you."

"Got it." And Sirius left the room, only to come back in a moment later.

"What's buggin' you mate? You look like McGonagall...you need to get that 'Dumbledore don't worry be happy' thing going."

"Evans," James mumbled. He ran a hand through his hair.

"What's to worry about? She's got a bad attitude and she's taking it out on innocent people," Sirius said grimly. A long, awkward pause passed.

"Your worried about Kaind." It wasn't a question. James noticed Sirius's eyes grow darker, and his jaw clench.

"Yes. Brittney cares a lot for Evans, and it's going to get her in trouble."

"Sounds like a certain player is finally settling for a single girl," James remarked.

"Yes, I really like her and I want to keep her from getting in over her head." he admitted slowly.

"We can't stop them. They're as stubborn as we are."

Sirius nodded his agreement. "Come on, let's go to class," he finished solemnly. The two grabbed Remus on his way down, and the three trudged to their first class of the day.

Lily walked into class with a Neanderthal grace. Her feet wouldn't pick up right, and she was so sore that she had to waddle in a duck fashion when she wasn't concentrating. She hissed quietly when her butt fell into the chair, and the migraine she'd developed didn't help. "Your doing this to yourself. Don't start whining."

Charms was boring; she'd accomplished the spell Flitwick had taught them within the first quarter of the class, so Lily was left alone with her thoughts.

_"I see you haven't apologized. What's wrong, coward?"_

_'No, I just haven't found the right time. They...have lives of their own.'_

_"Do you remember all the times you were forced to apologize? Don't you remember swearing to never apologize to anyone, even if you _were_ in the wrong?"_

_'That was before I had friends.'_

_"That is a lame excuse, even for you. You never did anything wrong, but still you had to say sorry. How did you feel when it happened?"_

_'I-I felt...stupid, I guess...'_

_"And what else?"_ It grew a hungry edge when it talked.

_'Low.'_ her self resolve started to diminish.

_"And?"_ It pried with a sick thirst, trying to break her will.

_'Humiliated.'_

"Ms. Evans? The class is switching partners, would you kindly pair with Lanie Plecot?" Professor Flitwick asked politely.

"Yes Professor," Lily answered tonlessly.

_"You want to be humiliated for something that might not work? No wonder everyone thought you were stupid."_

Lily spent the rest of Charms teaching Laine Plecot the spell she'd been having trouble with, and sneaking glances at the Marauders and C.Y., watching them to see if they missed her as

much as she missed them. _"Yes, they're going to run and forgive you and we're all going to have a great reunion. You forget what you did to Brittney, but still expect them to grovel for you."_

'_No, I was curious.' _

_"You wanted them to admit defeat first? That's the same as when you were forced to apologize. You had to be the weaker one to get what you wanted."_

_'I want my friends back.'_

_"But your friends don't want you."_

_'Yes they do! I know it.'_

_"Really? Why haven't they made any attempt to reconcile?"_

_'Because, because it's my fault we're here in the first place.'_

_"Because _every single bad thing _in the world is your fault, do you understand it you idiot?"_

There was a long pause._ 'Yes. I understand.'_

_"Now shut your half-wit mouth and go try and improve your appearance. Twit."_

Lily did dutifully as she was told, doing and re-doing her ponytail to assure herself that every hair was in place, and continually smoothing out her pants to make sure that there was not a crinkle in sight.

The bell rang after what seemed ages. She hurried out of the class with her head up, but her eyes down, and power-walked to History of Magic. Lily hurriedly took a seat in the middle of class, and got her quill and parchment out.

Lily didn't think History of Magic could ever have been as boring as it was then. With her self-exile leaving her with no one to talk to, she merely forced her drifting mind to listen to

Binns drone on and on about some psycho wizard who knew Ben Franklin while he was in England, and helped him discover electricity. _'Or was it elasticity?'_

This thought brought the smallest of smiles to Lily's face, leaving her eyes slightly brighter, and her mood a little better. The class was snoring or flying paper owls to friends across the room by the time the period was half over. Lily watched the rest of the students like a scientist, observing as many details as she could. Gordon Namstron charmed spit-wads to fly to Lanie Plecot's hair, Helga Antwong laid her head on her arms and began snoring lightly (Lily was told it was a nasal problem that developed from her mother's side of the family) and Theodore, Kobe's boyfriend, was looking at random Quidditch plans. Her green eyes looked over to Where Brittney, Logan, Kobe, James, Sirius, and Remus all sat. Sirius was doodling again, throwing looks over at Brittney, and then furrowing his brow as he used his quill to presumably draw said person. The aforementioned Gryffindor was twirling her wand between her fingers like a drumstick. Logan was braiding locks of her own hair, and Kobe had her chair on two legs, her head drooping on her chest with her eyes closed. James had his arms folded across his broad chest, his vision obscured by the reflection of the light across his glasses. James turned his head from the board behind Binns, and locked his potent hazel gaze with Lily's rare submissive one, asking a million questions she was to afraid to answer. Lily turned away and faced the board with a cold, emotionless demeanor once again. Her worn hand grabbed her quill and she vigorously began taking notes the rest of the period. The bell rang, signaling lunch. The day passed slowly, and by the time the last class was over, Lily was dancing on the balls of her feet. She walked in, ate a bread roll and walked back out. She ran to the Room of Adventures and headed to greet the punching bag.

It had been almost two weeks since the confrontation Brittney and Lily had. The latter worked hard, hardly ever saying anything except when asked questions by professors or students, and Brittney's patience was wearing thin because, or perhaps despite of it. Lily walked assertively, but the instant she saw Brittney, Lily would avert eye contact and glide past her.

Brittney and the rest of the group were in the Gryffindor common room later that night, just chatting by the fire after everyone had gone to bed. "Remus?" She asked.

"Yeah?"

"Why the bloody hell won't Lily tell me what's wrong?"

"That's not her," Remus stated simply. "I almost had to threaten not to let her have my pie in fifth grade before she would tell me she was having trouble in science. Lily's just not the person to tell anyone her problems."

"She's too stubborn and pigheaded eh?" Sirius remarked dryly from the space next to Brittney and James.

"She'd rather take everyone's pain for herself, than share the smallest sliver of hers with everyone. She doesn't think her problems are worth telling." Sirius's eyes dropped to the ground, his gaze softening with understanding.

"Full moon next week," Logan said after a long while.

"Yeah, all of us will meet you in the Shrieking Shack at eight," Kobe added.

"Hm, alright, but be careful. I might have already changed by then," Remus instructed. He rubbed his eyes with his slightly shaking hand.

"Go get some sleep Remus, you look exhausted," Logan said. His eyes had large bags under them, only accentuating the purple shadows. Remus's face had slight wrinkles, and he'd seemed to have lost a lot of weight.

Remus nodded his agreement with a sigh. The transformations always were hard on him, both mentally and physically. The lean teenager got up with a cough before slowly making way up the boys dorm stairs.

Lily was so tired she couldn't focus. Perspiration poured off her face and body in rivulets. Her breath came in pants and she had a stitch in her side, but she couldn't stop fighting the punching bag. It would mean she was weaker, that people could beat her up. She couldn't be weak, she had to show Them that she was strong or they would hate her even more than They did now. Lily fought in her slacks and dress shirt, which were soaked completely through with sweat. Dehydration made her throat sticky, but she still would not give up.

The room seemed hotter than normal. Humidity made Lily's eyes burn. Everything was spinning, she couldn't tell which way was up, couldn't stand up. "No, almost...there," she expelled on an exhale. She let out something half-way between a roar and a scream, and side-kicked the bag one last time before she lost her balance. Lily landed heavily, twirling and stumbling until her back hit the wall and she slid down. "You failed, you didn't do it right you stupid idiot."

Her heart pounded loudly, setting a beat for her lungs, which were expanding and contracting quickly, trying to get oxygen back into her body. Lily's mouth shut as she ground her teeth against the pain in her gut. She clenched her hands until they bled and cramped, adding both to her pain, and relief. She was being punished for doing something wrong. She didn't achieve her goal, and for that, she had to be hurt, a belief instilled in her for years. "You stupid, ignorant cretin. It's your fault." Lily self-scolded. Her body ached from strain, but Lily did not give it proper care, her body didn't deserve it. Lily pulled her legs up to her chest, rested her arms on her legs, and put her head in her arms as the sun began to rise.

The continuous thud above her brought Lily out of her doze. Her head ached something fierce, matching her figure. "Get up fool."

She opened her sore eyes, realizing the that the thud above her was the sound of a thousand people going to class. "Crap! I'm late. Well it's my fault anyway." Lily jumped up, stepping into an ice-cold shower and hurriedly putting on her uniform. She sprinted as fast as her body would let her out of the locker-room and down to Care of Magical Creatures.

"You're ten minutes late Miss Evans," Kettleburn remarked. "Would you like ten points from Gryffindor or two days detention?"

"Detention Professor," Lily responded quietly, taking a seat in the front of class.

"Alright then, meet Professor Cardel in front of the dungeons at eight, you'll serve your detention with him."

"Yes Professor," Lily mumbled. The class behind her snickered, making Lily's fists clench, re-opening the crescent-shaped slits in her palm. _"It's your own fault."_

Days went by agonizingly slowly. Lily fell into a routine: get up, get in an ice-cold shower, dress immaculately, get to class. She would wait until lunch, inhale a small amount of food, and then go wander the halls until her next class. Classes would end, and Lily would eat a tiny dinner, then go to the Room of Adventures and spar until dawn, when she would pull her body into an uncomfortable position and lightly doze for about an hour and a half. Then she'd get up and do it all over again.

Many, many times Lily would walk determinedly over to Brittney-intent on apologizing- but the second Lily would open her mouth, the phrase 'I'm sorry' flew out of her head, leaving her speechless and feeling stupid. She would mutter a lame excuse, like: "Nice shoes" or "You dropped your pencil", and then walk away with flushed cheeks and clenched fists.

Three weeks had since passed since the beginning of the fight, and neither side enjoyed it. Everyone who hung out with Brittney noticed the decline in Lily's appearance; the clothes that fit before were now too big, in her appetite; for she barely ate anything anymore, and in her attitude. All were sick of it. They wanted their friend back, the one who helped create half their pranks, the one who they'd bail and vice versa. They wanted the old Lily back. So did Lily.

Lily sat in the locker room the afternoon of the full moon. Classes ended early, due to Kobe and Logan setting dungbombs off in the great hall.

_"Ha ha, poor stupid Lily can't apologize."_

_'I'm trying, I just haven't felt the right time.'_

_"Quit trying to justify yourself. Go on, go say your pathetic sorry. I don't think you have the courage. Just like old times."_

_'Shut up.'_

_"You know what would alleviate your stress? A good swig of something in Hogsmede."_

_'I don't drink.'_

_"Yes, yes, everyone knows how much you hate drinking, and how you'd rather die than drink. Still, why not go and enjoy the night air?"_

_'I don't deserve to.'_

_"True, I want you to see what you're unworthy of getting."_

_'Why would I want that?'_

_"So you'll see how screwed up you are."_

_'I know I'm screwed up.'_

_"So why don't you go see the full extent. They'll be very angry at you if you don't go."_

What did she have to lose, her grades were fairly well, she had no friends to tell her off, and she'd be even worse if she stayed.

_'Alright, I'll go, but I'm not going to enjoy it at all.'_

_"Perfect."_

The Marauders, Brittney, Kobe, and Logan all snuck into the Shrieking Shack. The house was dark, dusty, and dank. A low growl met their animal ears. Sirius let out a playful bark, charging ahead to pounce on the werewolf. The two canines wrestled for a moment, and then the group walked out through the Whomping Willow.

Lily peeked out from behind the gigantic doors of the Entrance hall onto the grounds. They appeared devoid of life, deeming it safe for her to move. She slipped her increasingly skinny frame out the door, giving one last look around to make sure no one saw her change. Again, she could see no witnesses, thus began her transformation. She thought about the tiger; all the hairs, the specific colors, the shapes, the configuration, and within seconds, her body had paws, claws, and whiskers. She always felt awkward at first, what with having two extra legs to walk on, but her body soon adjusted.

She leapt from the stairs, glad for the change away from the form she was so disgusted with. Stripes's body soared in a graceful arc, landing softly on the lawn, and looking into Brittney's eyes for the first time in three weeks. Green met brown for a brief moment, then Lily sharply averted her eyes, and edged her way past Brittney.

Fang shut her eyes. Too long had they avoided talking, making eye contact, interacting with each other. Lily had retreated into a hard shell that no one seemed able to bring her out of. The past tension between them had built to a peak, and they were about to let it all out.

Fang turned and sprinted to Stripes, leaping and tackling the tiger to the ground. Fang got up, walking a little bit away before turning to stare at the non-moving feline angrily. Her brown eyes were bright, her body was poised and rigid. She roared loudly, audaciously daring her opponent to rise.

_"Lily's getting beat up, Lily's getting beat up!"_

_'Shut up!'_

_"Why, this is so much fun, watching you live up to your name: The mistake-"_

_'SHUT UP!'_

_"Just don't lose control twit. Not that you had much to start out with."_

_'Stay quiet and it will all blow over.'_

Lily slowly got up, trying to convey that she didn't wish to fight. Didn't work. It seemed, the longer she took, the angrier Fang got. Stripes heard the growling through her ears, though the registration took forever. The tiger stood and once again tried to skirt around Brittney, but to no avail. The panther brought her monstrous paw down on Stripes's forehead, leaving four shallow cuts between her eyes. Fang roared again.

_"Don't lose control. Freak."_

_'Just walk away.'_

_"Fight back."_

_'She's your friend.'_

_"She's an enemy."_

_'She's trying to help.'_

_"She'll hate you if you lose."_

_'She'll hate you if you win.'_

_"She's going to see you weak."_

_'She's afraid for you.'_

_"She's afraid_ of_ you."_

_'She wants to get over the fight you had.'_

_"She wants to break you, just like They did."_

Brittney began to walk away, angry and ashamed. Ashamed because of her behavior, angry because of the lack of Lily's. She'd gotten about ten yards ahead when she heard a roar not from her own throat. A large mass of orange and black fur hit her square in the side, knocking the wind from her and igniting her anger anew.

_'She won't break me. She can't break me.'_

_"She _can_ break you, and she will if you keep bumbling along like the bafoon you are."_

_'What do you know?'_

_"I've kept you alive this long haven't I?"_

Lily breathed hard, growling on every exhale. Fang got up, trying to get air back into her body as she took off after the sprinting tiger. _'Crap, I have a few broken ribs.' _Brittney realized. Lily had gotten ahead, turned, and ran full boar towards Fang. The two felines clashed. Stripes flung Fang into the air, listening with a half-hearted satisfaction as the panther's back hit with a sickening 'thump' on the rain-swollen ground.

Fang got up on shaky legs, blinking tears out of her eyes, completely oblivious to the dog that was Sirius, staring at the crystal liquid drop from beneath her squeezed lids. Her back hurt fiercely. Padfoot barked.

Stripes hissed angrily before galloping onto the path that led to Hogsmede, noticing the extra thumps on the ground as Fang followed her closely. She tailed Stripes for a good long while, until Lily turned sharply, effectively stopping the game of cat and mouse.

"WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?" Lily yelled at Brittney. Her eyes darkened, flashing different shades of green. Every muscle strained to attack the threat in front of her, but at the same time, itched to run from the trouble.

"ME? WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS _YOUR_ PROBLEM? I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THE PAST FOUR WEEKS FOR YOU TO GATHER UP ENOUGH SODDING COURAGE TO COME TALK TO ME YOURSELF, JUST BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO BLOODY CROWD YOU! BUT NO! EVERY SINGLE DAY, YOU SEE ME AND PUT YOUR TAIL BETWEEN YOUR LEGS AND AVOID ME! I'M SICK OF IT! OF IT ALL! I WAS AT THE POINT OF JUST GOING AND APOLOGIZING, JUST SO I WOULD GET MY BEST FRIEND BACK, BUT NO! YOU PUT YOUR EYES DOWN AND STALK PAST ME LIKE I NEVER MATTERED!"

"DON'T ACT LIKE YOU UNDERSTAND, BECAUSE YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND _ANYTHING_!"

Brittney recoiled back as though she'd been backhanded. She gasped, blinking back tears. Her anger returned, showing in her stature, which was poised to attack. "You'd like to think you're never wrong. You have to act like your someone, _just_ to get yourself through the day. You want someone to hurt like you do, I know it and you know it. You want them to know what pain you're in. YOU WANNA SHARE WHAT YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH, SO DO IT! HURT ME! SHOW ME THE HORRORS YOU'VE BEEN PUT THROUGH AND BLOODY HIT ME! YOU SEEM TO LIKE HURTING PEOPLE LATELY!" She shouted dangerously, her words coming from a deep growl in her throat.

"I don't hit people unless they hit first!" Lily defended furiously.

"DIDN'T MIND BREAKING THAT RULE WITH MALFOY!" Brittney screamed. Lily visibly paled, her eyes widening and her stance going from defensive to submissive. _"She found out you dolt! Great way to show your NOT screwed up!_

_'I didn't know she saw!'_

_"What does it matter? She knows, and you're screwed!"_

"HEY GUESS WHAT? I SAW THE WHOLE THING FROM THE LIBRARY! BUT YOU DIDN'T TELL ME! JUST LIKE YOU WON'T TELL ME ANYTHING NOW!"

_"Lily's in trouble!"_

_'Shut up!'_

_"A good tactic. Try it sometime."_

_'I said shut up!'_

_"She's going to hate you now. No doubt. You lied to her. You betrayed her. She's going to hurt you now. Just like Them."_ That prospect made Lily nauseous with terror. _"Unless you prove that your strong enough to get past it. It means you can't ever, ever apologize."_

_'If it'll get her back.'_

"FRIENDS WERE SUPPOSED TO TELL EACH OTHER EVERYTHING!" Brittney gave a look so full of disgust it made Lily tremble. "All I want to know now-" She turned and started walking back to the castle, both of them oblivious that they'd had an audience the whole screaming match. "-is what else you've been hiding from me."

Lily was now visibly shaking, filled to the brim with an unknown rage. She'd never been this furious in her life, this vividly enraged. She didn't think, didn't use common sense; she'd been humiliated. Her eyes looked up at the fur of the panther walking to the stag, dog, werewolf, wolf, and eagle. The green iris had gone black.

A loud morphing yell sounded behind Brittney, followed by Lily tackling and throwing Brittney against a tree. Stripes roared with a pitch so deadly sounding, the animals still standing drew back. Fang got up delicately, favoring her left side. Stripes hissed violently.

Fang returned the hiss, and the roar in equal fervor. She and Stripes circled, sending glares that would have frozen Hell over. Prongs was about to step in and try to make peace with them, but at that particular moment in time, Lily reared up, slamming her paws down on the

space between Brittney's feline shoulder blades, causing her front legs to buckle beneath her and her body to hit the rocky road.

She went down with a grunt, lurching forward with her back feet and hitting Lily in the legs. Anger coursed through the both of them, pumping adrenaline. Brittney back-handed the tiger below her. Amidst the calls of their friends to stop fighting, Lily got up, snarling. Both launched forward, clashing with claws and teeth aching to find a target. They rolled around, gathering cuts, bruises and momentum. Lily threw Brittney off her, slamming the middle of her back against the tree, effectively temporarily parilyzing her. The wind was knocked out of her; her body fell down the tree, her head banging-hard-against a rock, knocking her unconscious instantly. She was now vulnerable, defenseless, open.

Lily's paw was raised, about to come down on Fang's throat, slicing it open. Logan barked. Lily paused, the rush gone. Then the realization set in. _'Uh oh.'_

She'd almost killed her best friend, well, ex-best friend. _"She wouldn't want to be friends with the likes of you. You're stupid, pathetic, weak." _Her body, still retaining its posture, returned to human form. Her breathing was shallow and uneven. Sweat and red fluid ran down her body. Her eyes were wide with fear. She observed the limp figure laying before her.

Blood ran from various gashes on Brittney's body. Her breathing was deep, but her chest rattled. She looked too frail to have taken the severe beating she recieved. "Oh no, no."

Lily's hand stretched out, touched Brittney's hand, then drew back sharply. She did this several times, trying to gather the courage to keep her hand there. She managed to get her hand to stay put, letting the healing gift she had do it's job.

Many awkward moments later, The brown-haired young woman was free of cuts, bruises, and broken bones, though Lily looked worse for wear; each infliction, both old and new, was more illuminated than usual, her skin seemed stretched tightly across her increasingly bony body, coupled with the fact that she looked completely and utterly exhausted. She gulped, her breath coming in acute wheezes.

She backed away slowly, eyes still trained on Brittney as she morphed back into a tiger. Stripes turned the direction of Hogsmede, taking one great leap from her prone position. She landed, turning violently into the Forbidden Forest as James blocked her from going to Hogsmede and Sirius cut her off from going back to Hogwarts. James wanted answers, Sirius wanted revenge.

Lily ran as fast as she could to get away from her two pursuers. She stepped on a slippery rock, causing her body to tumble sideways, and the center of her back to slam, hard, on a log.

She could already feel the bruise forming as she took off, letting the prey gain distance from the predators.

James and Sirius saw her fall and get back up, running like there was a hurricane on her heels. Prongs's cloven hooves out-thundered Sirius's galloping paws as they chased the tiger ahead of them. They could hear her panting violently.

The three mammals were mere shadows flitting through the forest. Soon, the pursuers lost their target, leaving Lily to change to a human and collapse on the silent edge of the bank, with nothing but her breathing breaking the quiet surrounding her. She felt nauseous, fiercely nauseous. Her vision spun, she groaned mournfully. Then she vomited. Over and over, she retched stomach bile onto the wet grass beneath her. Her throat burned, her eyes ached from strain, and her entire being longed to drop. _"Lily's getting weaker."_ The voice taunted. Sweat soaked her, leaving her cold in the October chill. Beads of blood and perspiration dribbled off her. And still she puked. There was nothing left, but she desperately tried to hurl the self-disgust she had onto the ground. She finally gagged one last time before getting up, shaking and wheezing.

She walked to the edge of the lake, seeing her reflection on the surface. Snarling in disgust, she kicked the water, making ripples. They settled, and she saw her sick self in front of the human James. Lily whirled around, finding herself in extremely close proximity of the lean, strong, handsome teenager. She never once looked at his face, always at his wrists. Lily watched them like a hawk, waiting for him to get angry enough at her to strike. He took one step forward, and Lily took three steps back. The heel of her foot bent, touching the water.

Out of the corner of her eye, she realized that she could dive in and swim away; James hated swimming. She twisted and dove deep into the dark water. Her arm caught on a lake weed. Panicking horribly, she pulled away from the weed, pulled so hard, shoulder her popped out. Not entirely dislocated; she still could move it, but enough for her eyes to be blinded by the white hot pain that shot through her every time she moved it. She let loose a scream underwater that was just one bubble, and that was how James manage to find her in the dark water.

He swam up, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her to the surface. She thrashed wildly against him severely fighting to break free. They broke the face of the water, giant splashes from Lily's flailing limbs going everywhere. She elbowed him in the gut, causing him to release her sharply, letting her swim over to the edge and pull herself out of the water before James realized where she'd gone. She ran behind a tree, clasping a hand tightly over her mouth and shutting her eyes tight.

The night had gone eerily quiet as Sirius carried Brittney up a tree to prevent Remus from biting her, as she was still deeply unconscious. He cradled her upper torso in his arms, her head on his chest. His limbs were wrapped protectively around her as he watched the scene between James and Lily. The giant tree branch they'd perched on allowed him a grand view of the lake and the tree Lily had snuck behind. Brittney stirred, taking one deep breath before opening her eyes. "My head," she groaned. She curled up into Sirius for a moment, then sat up, eyeing her surroundings. "Where am I? Why in the world am I in a tree? Where's Lil-oh, I remember now." She clutched her temple in her hands. On an impulsive, slightly daring move, Sirius cupped her face in his large hands. He brought her forehead up to his lips, giving the space below her hairline a gentle kiss. She broke down, crying on his shoulder for a good five minutes.

Her sobsslowly dissipated, leaving deep, even breathing. She wrapped her own hands around his wrists. "Nothing until you're ready," He whispered.

"Nothing until I'm ready," she echoed quietly. She gave his lips a long, loving brush before settling down, nestled comfortably in his arms.

Lily perked her ears. No sound. She let her body relax, and in doing so, a twig snapped loudly, resounding through the grounds. She shut her eyes again. _'Oh crap.'_ She heard a rustling in front of her, and she slowly opened her lids, eyes fixed on the very lean, very masculine body of James Potter. She watched his wrists, never noticing the look of worry he gave her, though he noticed her terror filled gaze.

The witch began to back up, out onto the bank next to the lake shore. She never once looked away from his fists. _"He's going to punish you."_

_'Why should he sink so low?"_

_"You're right. This is all you."_

_'He doesn't deserve to."_

_"It's all your fault."_

_'You should do it and save him the trouble.'_

Lily came to a not so new revelation. Everything _was_ her fault. She should be punishing herself, not waiting for someone to do it for her.

That being realized, she gave herself a look of pure disgust before turning and running into the castle as fast as she could.

She made it to the Room of Adventures in record time, turning around and finding herself facing the row of mirrors above the sinks. She shouted something incoherent, slamming her fists against the mirrors until they shattered. Every single one. She screamed again, ripping off her clothes, stepping into a scalding shower and violentlytearing at her skin; she wanted out of the hide she was in, she wanted out of the disgusting body her parents gave her. she needed out of what she hated most.

Hours later, when her skin was very raw, and her throat very hoarse, she tied her wrist to a door and slammed the door shut, effectively fully dislocating it from it's socket. A wave of pain on a new level ripped through her, but she still didn't quit. She ran to the pool and jumped in, swimming as far and fast as she could, then got out andsprinted back to the sink, ramming her hands into the glass covered sinks.

She didn't sleep at all that night. She merely banged her bad shoulder into the stone wall, forcing herself into a purposely uncomfortable position. Letting her body slide down the wall, she looked at her bloody, gashed hands; she was alone and broken, fighting her most basic urge: crying.

A/N: Finite! Please, do tell me what you think, the reviews are appreciated.


	20. Internal Battle

1Lily's eyes had enormous bags by the time dawn arrived. She stood up, looking in the mirror with a haunted resignation. Mentally, she pulled her hair in a low pony-tail. She transfigured a faucet into a pair of scissors, grabbing them in her good hand and hacking away. Lily drew the blades across the thick, waist-length ruby hair. Slowly, deliberately, she watched herself cut her red locks. The cut was straight across, ending at her shoulders.

After, she walked to the locker she had that boarded all of her school pants. "Converto Threaderium." They morphed into skirts, the last thing Lily ever expected to wear. _'If I can't get out of my skin, I'll do the next best thing: hide in it.'_

_"Like it'll do anything. You're still the same retard you were last night."_

The short hair bothered her. She liked it long. Lily hated skirts; she had grown up in pants, but figured she didn't have anything else to lose...her dignity was already gone. One last look in the mirror, she noticed that her eyes were dead, dull. There was no spark, no fire that there once was. She was glad; that meant that she'd been punished appropriately.

1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111

Brittney woke up on the couch in the Gryffindor common room. Her body ached like she had never known before, and her face had dried tear stains on it. Suddenly, like an avalanche, the fight she had with Lily over the past month and a half rushed back into her brain. The back of the couch shifted behind her. "S'matter?" Sirius grunted, pulling his arms up to stretch.

She ran through her head the events that had happened in the months previous. Lily had become reclusive, despondent. She snapped at everything, automatically finding a retort to anything anyone said.

They had fought fiercely at the beginning of school, putting stress on their already straining friendship. Five weeks of avoiding Brittney, five weeks of feeling guilty, five weeks of fighting had pushed her over the edge. Now Brittney couldn't get back on. She had started the fight yes, and she had fueled it, but wasn't it Lily who'd finished violently? _"It doesn't matter, she wouldn't have had to finish it if you hadn't started it."_

Brittney sighed into Sirius bicep, feeling extremely guilty about all that happened.. "Everything."

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James woke alone. Lily wasn't in the other bed; it still retained it's rumples and curves from ages ago, it seemed. The wind blew across his bare shoulder-blades. He rolled from his side onto his back. His head ached, and his mind reeled. James could not, no matter what he did, get the image of the blind terror written on Lily's face out of his head. The utter shock, the disgust. He'd never seen her that open about her emotions. "What happened to you Evans?" He put his hands over his eyes, rubbing them hard. "Maybe I'll become homeless...That's it, I'll become homeless, and a hermit, no one to worry about but me."

That said, he got up. Stumbling towards the bathroom door, he grabbed a fresh change of clothes that hung out on the top of his dresser.

1111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111

Remus roused from his sleep with Logan at his feet and Kobe on the chair next to the couch he was on. His mind burned, a routine after-effect of the moon. All his muscles were stiff from morphing. What he realized was new to his "hangovers" were the tear streaks.

He sighed. "I feel the same way about her too," Logan said, sitting up and cracking her neck. "Worried and frustrated."

"Tell me about it." a long silence passed.

"In all the full moons we've gone through together, I don't think I've ever seen you in so much pain." She admitted.

"I shouldn't of changed, that would have stopped it." he grumbled. New tears sprung to his eyes.

"It would have prolonged it, but it wouldn't have stopped it. They'd have done it anyway."

He put his head in his hands and sighed heavily. Logan reached out, tentatively putting a hand on his shoulder.

He thought about last night, from the start to his finish.

_The full moon shone on his dull brown coat. Smells of plants and meat attacked him from all around, letting him experience a mixed blessing. He trotted along with Prongs and Padfoot, watching the eagle out of the corner of his eye, and barking happily at the wolf next to him._

_Remus noticed that the others stopped, so he followed. The werewolf noticed that they watched a tiger and a panther with an increasing amount of nervousness. The tiger walked away, and the panther took a flying tackle to her, flinging Lily through the air and onto the ground with a hard smack._

_Brittney roared, and the battle ensued. Over and over, they threw each other down until both looked ready to collapse. But they had more stamina that he realized. Brittney took off after a sprinting human Lily, stopping her and beginning to tirade on about the fact that she'd been dealt the raw deal. He agreed with her, he realized, because he had the same problem with her, being reclusive and hesitant. _

_He remembered Lily always saying that she'd never hit anyone first, no matter the insult. He remembered that she looked down one anyone who hit anyone without physically being attacked first. He also remembered the look of dread she had when she found out that Brittney had seen her break her own rule._

_Brittney had turned back into a panther when he noticed that the usual blood lust he had when smelling human bodies wasn't there. He felt numb. The unbreakable friendship was on one last thread. _

_Remus heard a roar, and discovered that Lily had attacked Brittney with a panicky rage he hadn't seen in anyone before. Well, other than Brittney presently, who had returned the volley with equal fervor. There was a head butt to Lily so hard that she couldn't breath, period. She retaliated by backhanding her opponent with a monstrous paw. On and on it went, never ceasing it seemed until Brittney faltered. Not much, but enough._

_Lily had spotted the hesitation and-as she was taught-went straight for it. assault after assault, the melee went on. The tiger attacked her foe with increasing force, but less precision. She took a flying leap, pushing Brittney to the ground and twisted; she threw Brittney into a tree, back first, as if she were a sack of potatoes. There was a dull thump as flesh met wood. But it didn't stop there, no. Lily roared; it was the deadliest sound Remus had ever heard out of her, or for anyone for that matter. The sound she emitted made him tremble. _

_The lithe teenager advanced on Brittney like a predator on wounded prey. Fast, but agile, Lily raised her paw with her claws extended over the throat of the human at her feet. Lily was going to do it, she was going to eliminate the threat. _

_A mental door opened, and Lily's eyes widened. The urge to kill had passed, leaving a feeling of panic. The seconds ticked by, Lily unconciously changed into her two-legged figure, her breath coming in short gasps and her body shivering violently, like it was out in the blistering cold. Slowly, she lowered her hand, attempting-many times before she could bring herself to do it-to heal Brittney. The thought of her pathetic self touching someone better than her made her feel contaminated. She managed to keep her hand there, letting the beings at hand do their work. A few moments later, Brittney was free of injury, though she still didn't wake._

_Remus watched Lily back up. Sirius snuck past him, his jowls bared. James walked up the road in the direction away from Hogsmede, and Lily was caught in the middle. Bad mix. Even the werewolf knew that much. She never liked being in a corner, she always fought like an animal to get out of one as well. Lily turned one way, sprinting until Sirius lashed, and she twisted to run the other way, only to come into contact with a rearing James. Instead of running around, she made a ninety degree turn into the forest. James and Sirius both ran after her, but Sirius came back shortly after, picking up Brittney and slinging her over his dog back. _

_The confusion was a bit much for Remus, the anger, pain, terror. He couldn't think, so he ran. Back to the Shrieking shack he galloped. He slid and stumbled his way into the main room, where the moon was out of sight, beginning to fade down beneath the clouds to allow the sun it's turn. _

_Logan chased after him, finding a naked Remus sobbing on the dust covered floor. Logan grabbed a blanket between her teeth, and draped it over his lanky body. She curled up next to his back until the sun rose, when she snuck back up to the common room and fell asleep._

He got up. "We have to go to class, I'll see you in Herbology." He walked upstairs, leaving Logan alone with her thoughts.

Lily walked with her head down on her way to Charms after lunch. She'd seen the rest gather at the Gryffindor table, meaning she went hungry. _"It's not like they would want you there anyway."_

_'I know.' _Lily had went to the library instead, grabbing a book and plopping her bony body in to a wooden chair. The bell rang, signaling the end of one period and the beginning of another. She got up, unfortunately smacking her dislocated shoulder on a table, causing it to sway out of its socket and inflame a new pain in her arm.

Charms was a breeze, Flitwick let them have a catch-up day because he was now shorter than the pile of school work he often stood on to give lecture. "Just study for whatever it is that you pupils need to study for!" He chuckled, grabbing a book to get at the first part of the stack of papers he needed to grade.

James was next to Lily, due to assigned seating; therefore, he began watching her as the clock ticked by. Her hand was constantly fidgeting with something, be it her hair, her pencil, or her skirt, which he hadn't noticed until then.

Lily on the other hand, was trying hard not to notice anything at all. To bypass the time, she crossed her arms to make somewhere for her head to rest while she mulled things over. She gripped her quill in her hand and...

_She was falling. Down past a cliff, the air rushing past her created a weird pulling at her navel. Before she knew it, she'd landed back first on a bunch of hard gravel. Groaning, she pulled herself up. The area she was in was barren, save for a few sparse, dead trees here and there, along with a thick mist that blanketed the land so she couldn't see ten feet in front of her. Two figures, one draped in black, the other in white. The only sound but the rushing breeze was her increased breathing rate. The black one cackled an evil cackle that reminded her of someone she desperately wanted to forget. The white one smiled somberly. Both had long white beards had their hoods covering their heads, casting their faces in dark shadow. _

_The black one held his hands out, and wave after wave of pain hit Lily with the force of the Hogwarts Express. Over again, the torrent of agony buried her, until many minutes of her on her knees, gripping her stomach. Just when the hurt subsided, the one in white let loose his downpour of torture, and just her luck, this one was four times worse. She vomited repeatedly, hurling nothing and everything onto the ground in front of her. _

_Her head pounding, she got up and began running as fast as she could. Another man in a white cloak chased after her, soon running parallel. She slowed down and sped up, and he matched her speed perfectly. "Hel-" Lily began to yell, but at that particular moment in time, the man rammed into her ribs, sending her flying backwards in the air. _

_Lily's fall was broke by an old Colosseum's floor covered in smoothed pebbles. She tumbled, finally stopping on her back once again. Out of the ground it seemed, came shackles of metal, binding her spread-eagle on the ground. Water began to slowly fill and the fog dissapated. Distorted faces of those she couldn't recognize were all pointing and laughing at her. A line of people in black cloaks trudged up to the side of her rib cage, all kicking her middle with what seemed like all they could muster. _

_Suddenly, a man bigger and more terrifying than all before him combined walked up, cracking his massive knuckles. The water was now at her eyes. His frame was blocked out by the rushing tempest flowing past the tip of her nose. He let loose a drive with the foot so hard that when she screamed her lungs out beneath the liquid, all there was to show for it was a small air bubble. _

_And then..._

She woke up. Blood trickled down her sweaty palms. "Miss Evans?" Professor Flitwick asked tenatively, as all eyes were on her, making her blush.

"I h-have t-t-to go." Lily stood up, dizzily making her way to the door, slamming it shut. The class watched as one lone drop of blood fell from the handle.

She couldn't regain her balance; her feet stepped on themselves in her hurry to get away from the class room and into the Room of Adventures. Her arm flailed, but she couldn't right herself. Lily's head slammed into the wall, knocking her unconsciousness.

Lily woke up with her vision extremely blurry. She grunted. Her head swam. Lily looked to her left, seeing a crowd of six block her from the rest of the room. The one closest to her on her left had dark hair, carefully messed up so it fell elegantly into his eyes. The next one had short, light brown hair and a wrinkled face.

Lily blinked again, grateful that it cleared her eyesight a small bit. The next person had almost blonde hair and amethyst eyes. _'I know who that is.' _ Her twin stood next to her with their hands held. A tall man stood next to him with the messiest hair and the most intense hazel eyes, along with glasses and a long nose. _'Potter.' _ The last girl had long brown hair and bright brown eyes. This rung a bell in Lily's head. _'Oh crap, Brittney. She shouldn't have to look at me...have to get away.'_

_"The loser's finally gaining knowledge."_

Brittney stared hard at the bag of bones laying on the bed. That's all the red-head seemed to be anymore, just a skeleton with skin stretched over the osseous tissue. She swore that there were times when she could hear Lily's belly grumble.

"I-I n-n-nee-need-need to l-l-le-lea-leave." The ruby capped girl stammered terribly; Sirius wondered if only he noticed or if it was as obvious as it seemed, but Lily looked to be trying to shrink herself into nothingness. Trying to will herself into oblivion.

Lily flinched her way around the wall of people in her hurry to get out of the hospital wing. Her stride went from one of confidence-bordering on arrogance- to a stumble with a head parallel to the floor, along with hunched shoulders. James, almost on instinct, reached a hand out to her. He touched her shoulder and she recoiled violently, jerking her shoulder down. "Don't touch me," she snarled.

She all but ran to the Room of Adventures to be punished.

"Well where's Miss Evans gone to?" Madame Pomfrey rounded on them as she walked out of her office.

"We don't know!" Sirius spat. "I personally don't care right now either."

"A smart lot you are! You can't keep someone who's apparently _not_ well, in a bed, so that she can be healed."

"We're sorry Madame Pomfrey, we'll go look for her." Logan chimed in.

"Yeah," Kobe echoed. James and Remus nodded their assent-Sirius with some reluctance. Brittney stayed pensive through the deal, but she left with the rest of them anyway.

The lone 6th year rocked back and forth on the pool deck. More blood ran down her body as she re-opened the scratch marks on her upper torso. _'I-I did-didn't k-k-know wh-what to-to do! I-I-I'm so-sorry.'_

_"YOU FOOL! _HOW_ ON EARTH DID YOU NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO? IT WAS SIMPLE: WAKE UP AND LEAVE, NO WHINING, NO FLINCHING, NO NOTHING! YOU-HAVE-JUST-_RED FLAGGED_ THEM!"_

_'I'll go get punished now...'_

_"Yes. You had better, or They'll think that you're being lazy, slacking off. You wouldn't want them to think that, would you?"_

_'N-n-n-nev-never'_

_"Then get a move on you dolt."_

Lily sat up sometime after dawn, covered in dried blood and purple-blue bruises. The nightmares she had were relentless, they always reminded her of how awful she was. As she lifted her body off the cement floor she looked at the clock. It was seven thirty, and classes were in half an hour. _'Another day in Hell. Joy to me.' _

She went through the day in silent suffering. Transfiguration was the last class, and everyone, including McGonagall, left early but James and Lily.

Lily was packing her things up, and was just about to leave when: "Evans, stop." She froze, her limp arm swinging painfully. "You dislocated your shoulder, let me pop it into place."

"N-n-no-no, it's o-o-okay. It-it doesn't h-hurt."

"Bollocks it doesn't. Stand still." He got up and stood directly behind her. He was big, muscled and masculine all the time, but now he was terrifying.

"I-I'm o-okay."She lied. Her shoulder hurt something fierce. James was too close. He set two very large hands on her shoulders.

"Just relax." he said. "Everything'll be okay." That didn't work. If anything, she tensed even more.

"Lily look over there!" he yelped. "What?" she jumped. And felt her shoulder pop horrendously back into place. Her breath hitched as her knees buckled. James caught her around her waist and pulled her to him.

James drug her to the next desk and transfigured some paper into a sling. His fingers wrapped around her wrist and held it to her ribcage as he tied the sling around her. "How did you dislocate your shoulder?" He asked casually, but she still caught the curious glance he passed.

"I-I wa-was being s-st-stupid." she stuttered. _"He doesn't like stuttering. None of Them do. Stop stuttering, stop, stop, stop!"_

"Th-thanks P-Potter," Her voice strained not to falter. One of James's hands stretched to check the bandages surrounding her shoulder, the other held her arm tight to her sides. Lily's muscles seemed to almost explode with how stiff they were.

She slid smoothly-smoothly as she could, anyway-from the desk and away from him. She nearly ran to the door and back to the Room of Adventures. Leaning heavily against one of the pillars that adorned the room, she looked at one of the mirrors and watched as she tore the bandages from her arm, her periphrial vision seeing the white material flutter to the floor. She turned her back to the pillar and slid down. The only thing that kept her awake through the night was slamming her shoulder into the stone column. _'Nothing to lose. Nothing's worth it. I'm not worth it.'_

_"Who are you?"_

_'A Freak."_

_"What are you?"_

_'A Failure.'_

_"What's your name?"_

_'The mistake that should've never happened.' _Eyes blinked quickly. The shoulder slammed harder into the pillar. Pain, she deserved pain. They wanted her to be in pain.

She couldn't tell what voice laughed.

Four days later, after debating what to do, Lily was found sitting at the edge of Remus's cot in the Hospital Wing. The last day of the full moon was hard on him, and she figured that it was okay to talk to him if he didn't know he was being talked to.

One foot dangled off the bed as her scabbed hands wrung themselves. "Umm...w-well, I fi-figured I could talk to you, because you couldn't hear me, and...well...I wanted, very badly, to um, to talk to _anyone_ really. I'm sorry because I know that if you were awake, you'd tell me to leave, because...well..who wouldn't right?" She laughed nervously, her emerald eyes darting around to make sure no one was there. Two hands twisted the bed-sheets around. "I don't like admitting I'm wrong, or that I'm weak, though I know I'm both...but I miss everyone. I don't deserve to have them around, but I still miss them; hanging out, playing pranks, things like that. I hu-hur-hurt Brittney _so_ badly, I know she'll never like me, but I-I just wanted to say what I've been feeling. But everyone should know that there are things that shouldn't be asked...though there's nothing wrong with me...I don't like what they imply." _'Because it's too close to the truth.'_ "If you see everyone else soon, just..." Lily sighed defeatedly. "Never-mind, I don't deserve it. Thanks for listening."

There was a rustle. _"Oh crap. Nice going idiot. They'll be mad if They find out you've been weaker than usual."_ Brittney stood next to the gap in the curtains. Lily averted her eyes quickly. Better they thought you submissive. "Oh, well, I didn't know someone was here, I'll just go then." She made to leave.

_'Better now than never.'_

_"She won't like it. I can't belive you're even thinking about doing it."_

_'She's leaving!'_

Lily inhaled.

"I'm sorry." she said quickly, crunching her hands together into one fist. It was sure to come. Punishment had to.

Brittney slowly turned around, shock evident on her face. "What?"

"F-For what it's worth...I'm very sorry."

Lily got up, she'd said what she had to say. Sliding around as close to the wall as she could, she tried to leave. Leaving quickly sounded good. Humiliation in private was better than in public. Halfway to the door Brittney gently cut her off.

Lily whimpered and shied away from Brittney's hand on her good shoulder. It was coming, she knew it. Wait for the pain. She was turned to face Brittney. Now, Brittney was tall, but still a good head and half a shoulder shorter than Lily, but Lily's head was down, her shoulders were hunched; Lily only looked a few feet tall.

"I'm sorry too." Lily's eyes looked into Brittney's of their own accord. Brittney wrapped her arms around Lily, pulling her into a tight hug. Lily's eyes were surprised, but she was glad she didn't cry. Brittney was crying, rather quietly, but crying all the same.

Lily's bony appendages slowly, almost disbelievingly returned the embrace. _'She's glad.'_ The other voice didn't reply. Lily pulled Brittney tighter. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." She chanted. Over and over again, trying to make up for all the times the apology was never heard.

They released each other after a long while; Brittney's eyes were red, Lily's tired. The past tension was diminished. "You should get some sleep Stripes, you look like Snivellus."

Lily giggled. "I will now." She replied confidently.

They walked out through the corridors together, parting to go to their respective dorms. The immense weight seemed to have lifted off Lily's shoulders.

The dreams however, only intensified.


	21. The Truth Comes Out

Well...a large amount of writer's block..ermm...I'd had the plot in my head for a long time, yet I couldn't really figure out how to write it. But, here it is.

A tune Lily hadn't remembered since she was eleven sounded through her silent, fireless common-room. She didn't even remember where she heard it from, but it played through her head at times, when she was bored or happy. Quietly putting her feet on the spiral stairs, Lily padded her way to her bed. She noticed James first off; his hair was messier than usual, his body extremely inviting. Lily shook that thought off. _'Just because she forgave you, doesn't mean he has.'_

_"Serves you right. You deserve to sleep in your own horrid evil."_

_'I know. They wouldn't want it any other way.'_

Lily pulled her clothes off in the bathroom and changed into large pajama pants and an even larger shirt that hung to her knees. The comforter was warm against her cold skin, and the feather pillow provided almost heavenly relief to the ache in her neck. She was fast asleep within minutes of laying down, hoping that the knowledge that she had her best friend back was enough to stop the night terrors that had plagued her for so long.

It didn't.

_"It's your fault we're dead. If you had been better, if you had done what They told you to do, we would still be alive," Aunt Faith growled. She looked awful, with missing pieces of flesh revealing the bone and tendons on her body. The dress she'd been buried in was molded and ripped and hung loosely off her decaying shoulders. The smell alone was enough to make Lily vomit._

_"They knew you would screw up, you always screw up. The only plus for you is that you haven't said anything yet. But you will, you'll muck it up. And They'll know. They always know," Sirius's rich voice whispered into Lily's ear. "They're going to make sure you regret every single screw-up you've done, which is a lot, so I suggest you start preparing."_

_Try as she might, she couldn't stop that dreadful stutter as Lily began trying to apologize. "I-I-I-I a-a-am-am s-s-s-so-sor-sor-sorry-" but James didn't let her finish. She saw him in his plaid pajama pants that hung low on his slim hips, but the skin she saw had been torn away in places, he was missing gobbets of flesh in the shape of human bite wounds. "They found me. Bit me to death They did, you wretch. Both of Them took chunks out of me, and bit my neck open because you couldn't do anything right! I'll kill you...no, wait. I'm going to do worse to you. I'm going to let you live," he pondered this thoughtfully while Brittney glared from eyeless sockets. "Yes, I'll make you wish I would kill you, but I'm going to bring you to the brink of hell, and then I'm going to stop just long enough for you to think you're safe."_

_"You're never safe," Logan growled from a voice long past use. Her twin barked out a harsh laugh. "You're going to slip up, tell someone what happened, and we'll know. He'll know and He'll come for you. He'll know when you screw up and He'll make you regret ever breathing._

_"Lily, you're a waste of space. You're an incompetent fool who deserves every bit of punishment she's going to get. We'll start now." Remus rumbled as he morphed into a large wolf and lunged for her with his mouth wide. James suddenly appeared behind her and pinned her arms behind her back as the beast tore into her stomach. She fought the man who held her violently, trying to stay conscious as the pain enveloped her body._

James woke at the soft rustling of bed-sheets. He opened his eyes, confused at the new sound in the room. He turned to face what caused him to wake and to his surprise, found Lily in her bed with her eyes shut, but her sleep was far from peaceful. She was thrashing around the sweat-soaked sheets with a face that twisted into a look of pain. Her too-skinny arms were pinned to the bed as though someone were holding them there. "S-s-or-sor-sorry!" She mumbled. James watched in horror as the struggling became extremely primal, beyond desperate. "He-he-hel-help-help!" The lithe teenager bolted from his bed to hers and grabbed the bony shoulders in his large hands. He began to shake her, trying to get her away from the night terror that plagued her mind.

She finally opened her eyes, disoriented and extremely afraid. _'He's here, oh shit, I've screwed up and I can't remember!'_

The broad-shouldered man above her had a firm grip on her and she lashed out for his face on instinct. She connected with his cheek in a very painful slap, causing his hands to fly to his head. Lily rolled out of bed and fell onto the stone floor. She ran impeccably fast down the stairs despite the pain in her legs. They crumbled beneath her and she fell to her knees. The room swam and she began to gag, which progressed to vomiting. Bile hit the floor with a sickening splash, but Lily still heard James begin to sprint down the stairs in an effort to catch her.

"Evanesco," she yelled hoarsely and bolted out the portrait-hole. The pounding in her head matched the pounding of her feet on the cold floor as she ran to the Room of Adventures for punishment.

_'I'm in big trouble.'_

_"Ha! Trouble doesn't even begin to describe what you'll be in for if you don't shape up."_

Morning came all too slow for Lily. Heartburn from the severe amount of puking she'd done seemed to try and ignite her parched throat.

At long last, after a grueling loss to Ravenclaw, winter had come. Lily hadn't chosen to

play on the Gryffindor Quidditch team any longer; however Brittney had taken her place as seeker.

The days were too long. Lily had no idea on what to do because food hardly stayed down long enough for her to digest it and she hadn't gotten more than 3 hours of sleep the past week. She'd dreaded sleeping, but didn't have enough energy to stay awake. James, Brittney, Remus, they were all suspicious and they had every right to be. She was incompetent at keeping the past away from the present. She was always incompetent. Always a mistake. Never good enough.

Her legs barely held her up anymore. When walking Lily could actually feel her lower body tremble with the effort of staying upright. Doing anymore than a fast walk caused dizzy spells, yet she still ran, swam, fought and jumped until she was too exhausted to move. Thankfully winter holiday was the next Tuesday and everyone was going home, which Lily hoped would give her the break away she needed to get her twisted mind back in order. Didn't happen. As it would turn out James was staying behind as well, and Lily knew he'd watch her like a hawk. So she avoided him at all costs.

"Is everything ok?" he asked one night when he'd walked up behind her. James touched her shoulder gently and Lily nearly freaked. She flinched instinctually away from him and pressed her bony back into the wall.

"It's perfectly ok!" Lily whispered in response, barely trusting herself to speak louder. "Why shouldn't it be ok?"

"Because you seem...different, for lack of a better term." he'd taken a small step to her, which caused her body to tense visibly. "I know that it's an understatement. You're not the same as you were at the end of last year."

"I'm fine...hormones, puberty you know," Lily forced out with a fake smile. "I'm just trying to adjust to the change is all."

"Uh-huh, listen, Lily I-" He started but Lily cut him off

"Oh look! Time for me to run, gotta head to the shower...Places to go, people to see!" She took off at a brisk walk down the hall, leaving James once again alone and confused.

Once James was out of sight, Lily leaned against the wall, trying to calm her legs and stop the pounding in her head. _ "You're gonna screw it all up. Sixteen years of silence and you're going to blubber it all away like some fool who doesn't know when to keep her mouth shut!"_

"I'm trying...Dear God I'm trying..." Lily whispered to the silent hall. She began to softly bang her head against the stone behind her.

Tuesday had come and gone. The castle was nearly empty, save for the few orphans, James and Lily. It was early Friday evening when things had gone completely haywire.

James had gone to bed early, complaining of a headache. Lily followed about an hour later. She lay in bed, staying as quiet as possible but never allowing herself to sink into the world of nightmares. She twisted around, pushing the duvet off of her to keep from becoming too relaxed. _'This isn't working.'_

_"Because you're not doing it right you twit."_

She slid out of bed noiselessly, slipping on her shoes and tip-toeing silently out of the door and towards the quidditch pitch.

James opened his eyes once he heard the door leave and the last sound in the room was the swoosh of his invisiblity cloak going over his shoulders. He caught sight of her now dull red hair around the corner of one corridor. It wasn't until she opened the main doors that he realized she was going to the field. _'She can't fly at night, so what's the point of going down there?'_

The pitch had been removed of snow, but a slick frost still clung to the blades of grass, freezing them in place. James leaned on the Hufflepuff side of the arena, curious to see where and what Lily did every night. He watched her pull her hair into a ponytail at the nape of her neck, noticing -with a bit of worry - that she couldn't use her left arm above shoulder height.

Lily began to jog around the field. It seemed harmless enough to James, until she began running faster and faster. He could hear her panting from nearly directly across the pitch. Lily stopped suddenly, pivoting. She ran straight down the middle of the field. Soon there was back-hand springs, flips, pivots, jumps and sudden stops. She yelled hoarsely and began a set of lines, then a front tumble and as she landed, her ankle rolled painfully. James heard her gasp echo and saw her fall to the ground and grasp her leg and bite her lip.

A quiet moment followed. James heard her grunt and stand, stomping her bad leg into the ground. She took off at a faster speed than ever, doing more gymnastics and purposly landing on her ankle. It was another 10 minutes before she finally limped slowly to the showers, her body tense and drenched in sweat.

James followed her into the locker room 15 minutes after she'd gone in. He found the door ajar enough for him to slip through and found her bent over the sink, staring at the shards of glass from the mirror in the bowl. Her hair was wet, a towel hung next to her and the smell of her shampoo hung in the air.

James slipped off the cloak and started talking to her with his eyes fixed on her bloody hands. "What the hell are you doing, Lily?"

She jumped, cringing first from his tone of vioce and then from the pain of putting weight on her bad foot. "What do you mean?" she snapped in reply. "I'm doing nothing!"

"Bollocks! What happened to you Lily? You're skin and bones! You're not eating, you're not sleeping, you don't say anything to anyone anymore! You have bruises, along with a messed up shoulder, a gimp, and a bad attitude! Whatever it is, say it now or get over it!" James barked.

"There's _nothing_ wrong! I'm fine! Back off, Potter!"

"So you're just going to turn away when we _repeatedly _offer our help to you?" His voice dropped dangerously, but Lily was far to angry to care. They didn't need to check up on her. She was doing fine punishing herself on her own.

"That's _exactly_ what I'm going to do Potter! Now get away from me you nosey bastard!"

James gave her a disgusted look. "I thought you were better. That's extremely selfish of you, Evans." He watched her tense visibly through the shoulders as she stopped from her walking to the door. Her voice had an unusual, almost maniac strain on it and it made him slightly nervous.

"Selfish? Is that what you think I am? _Selfish?_" she whirled to face him. Lily's eyes had gone that eerie dark green-almost black color; the look on her face made it very obvious that he'd struck a large nerve. "Does being _selfish_ include cleaning after your mother when she was too _drunk_ to do it herself? Does being selfish include being 4 years old and getting called a mistake when you tried to help her with one of her morning-after pills and her hangover so she wouldn't yell at you? Does being selfish include telling her you loved her as she brought one of her clients to her bedroom, just so she might _once, just once_ say something that didn't make you feel like the scum of the earth?" Lily had taken a small step toward him, making him back into the lockers. Her voice rose into a very angry yell. "Does being selfish include never crying so your mother wouldn't hate you more than she did, even when I watched her die in front of me on my sixth birthday?"

"Does being selfish include taking the beatings for your sister's mistakes so she wouldn't have to suffer? Does being selfish mean literally getting beat to within an inch of my life so _my sister_ wouldn't? Does being selfish include being terrified to go home after getting beat up and picked on at school? Does being selfish mean saying you'd called the police instead of your sister when He broke my arm? Am I selfish for not crying when he shot himself four months after that?" she had him against the lockers. He began to worry more when she didn't stop advancing.

"Am I selfish for saving my aunt, the _only _adult who'd ever given a damn about me? Am I selfish for not telling her Voldemort was after her so she wouldn't have to worry? Am I selfish for feeling guilty when she was murdered because of _me?_ AM I FUCKING SELFISH TO YOU, POTTER? WHAT'S YOUR VERDICT? AM I THE SELFISH BITCH EVERYONE'S COME TO KNOW?" Lily was less than half a foot from his face, her teeth bared and a dangerous glint in her eyes. Her breathing was labored as she watched his shocked face for a reaction. James racked his brain for something to say, but all that came out were sputters.

"I- w-we- I'm-" His incoherent stutters washed over Lily. As her breathing slowed, her brain came back into function, and the full realization of what she'd just done hit her like a ton of bricks.

Gone was the angry stance and the loud voice. Gone was everything agressive about her. She now had the look of a caged animal that knew it was about to die. Lily limped towards the door, her breath quickening into sharp, shallow pants. "I wasn't supposed to say anything..."

"Lily..." James found his voice and he reached his hand out; Lily shied away as though it were death itself reaching for her, but in her mind he was. He was the reincarnation of the father who made sure his daughter knew how much he hated her.

The red color her face had drained quickly, replaced instead by white. Lily's eyes were the emerald green again; they had a dullness and at the same time an extreme shine, but she wouldn't look James in the eyes. No, she focused on his hands, his large, powerful, very painful looking hands. "I was supposed to shut up-" she panicked. Her face contorted into one of utter terror, her body trembled and her hands had formed fists. James looked down and noticed the blood dripping from her clenched palms. He took a step out towards her with what he thought was a comforting demeanor, but she backed up. Lily's hands had begun to feel for the door. "I-I have to go..." she breathed. At that time, her hands grabbed the door handle, swung it open and ran as fast as she could through the snow towards the castle. James chased after her but she'd gotten a good distance. The snow falling down obscured her somewhat.

Panting hard, she sprinted inside the castle doors, completely forgetting all sense of stealth. The pain in her ankle was swept up in the rush of adrenaline she now had coursing through her. Through the corridors, up the stairs, and without thinking she screamed the password at the painting and dashed up her stairs and into the bathroom.

She gasped for breath and the realness of what she'd done, what she'd been forbidden on the pain of death to do replayed again and again in her brain. Lily ran the back of her hand over her forehead, wiping the sweat that had formed. What to do...what to do? Where was that damned voice? _"Haha. I knew you would screw up you worthless fool! He's big, and He's strong, and He's going to make you wish you'd never learned to talk. I wonder what he'll do...hit your stomach? You're always weaker around the stomach...might've been the number of kicks you'd gotten. What do you think, Mistake?"_

_'Oh no..what do I do? How do I get out of here? I'm in a corner...dammit!'_

Lily's breathing had changed to short breaths as she looked in her bathroom mirror. She shut the door she'd come through, and then slammed her fists into the glass in front of her. It shattered and fell into the sink, where she continued her pounding. "DAMMIT!"

As she raised her arms for another strike, she heard the portrait slam. Blood slowly dripping down her arms, she froze, terror coursing through her. "What do I do?" she whispered out loud. She whispered "Nox" to the light that had automatically come on when she opened the door and waited with baited breath as she heard footsteps going up the stairs. _'How do I get out of here?'_ her stomach was in knots, she was on the verge of retching, yet she dared not move.

The steps that made their way to the bathroom door that joined the two bedrooms of the dormitory sounded like the footfalls of death. As the handle turned, Lily stopped breathing entirely. The door opened, and the light flooded the room.

James froze in the doorway, staring at Lily, who was frozen 3 feet away from him. He watched her eyes dart around in a frenzy, and he realized she was looking for a way to bolt. Lily's eyes fixed on a spot to his left, and he saw it was the door to the room that was supposed to be hers. She threw a glance at him, then at the door again, then with immense speed, lurched to the door. She crowded the handle, and got it a foot open before James moved behind her and slammed it shut. She jumped for the door that was left ajar in James's wake, but he shut it as her hand slid down the wood.

She whirled to face him, limping a 180 degree turn and then backing up slowly. James advanced and she retreated. Her breath hitched constantly, and her eyes were trained on his hands. She never looked up to see the concern written on his face. Lily flinched as her shoulder-blades touched the shower wall. She'd backed herself into a corner with no way out.

James looked her up and down. There was literally almost nothing there. Her hair was dull, her eyes terrified, and her legs were trembling violently. She began to wipe her hands on her jeans, and when he reach his hand out, they flew to cover her belly. Lily started sliding once, and her legs fought to hold her up. "Lily..." he whispered sadly, and he watched her wince as he started to speak. The trembling got worse. "What happened, Lily?"

Lily's eyes shut tightly, and as she opened her mouth, her legs gave from beneath her. She kept waiting for the sickening crunch of her knees on the floor and then Him to begin his torture, but it never came. Two strong arms grabbed her and pulled her to another body. She whimpered and went rigid in James's embrace and his heart broke for her. "Lily," he whispered again and he heard her teeth chattering in fear. He pulled her up and carried her to the bathroom sink and set her down after clearing the class. She recoiled from him and backed up as far as she could, her eyes still watching his hands. A long silence ensued. The only thing heard was her labored breathing, which got quicker and shallower with each passing moment.

James slowly reached out and turned on the faucet next to her. She jumped as the water hit the sink. He reached and slid his fingers gently along her wrist, capturing it in a soft but firm grip. Holding her hand over the basin, he began to gently pick the glass out of her hand. "Relax your hand, please," he said softly, and with great effort, she did so.

James's mind reeled as he cleaned her hands. He felt horrible for ever fighting with his parents. All the times he'd gotten angry at them when they'd said no to some hair-brained and dangerous scheme, all the times he'd talked horribly to and about them. And here was this woman who's mother never wanted her...who's father..._beat _her. That someone could do that to another human being...to their own flesh and blood sickened him. He began to wonder what life would have been like if she'd had a proper family. How different would she be? And then he began to ponder about why they hated her like they did. Why they felt they could do that to their own child. The one thought that ran repeatedly across his mind was that she was afraid of her parents. She was terrified of them, and thus became afraid of people in general. Her first eperiences were negative. Harsh words, harsh feelings, beatings (he had the hardest time wrapping his mind around that one).

He said nothing to her while he worked and only absently noticed her quick, shallow gasps, he barely registered her pulse, which was shallow, fast and eratic. Her parents never wanted her. She was afraid of her own family. He was never afraid of his parents, he trusted them with his life, with everything. She probably never slept when with them. She wondered how to avoid getting hurt and did anything she could to save herself the pain. He angered at the fact that her father would do such horrible things to such a beautiful, precious woman. His own daughter. In his irritation, he gripped harder than necessary and in the distance he heard her sharp gasp and wimper. He immediately released her other hand, thankful the last of the glass was out.

Instead of grabbing for her again, he held out his hand and waited for her to give her own to him. She had snapped her arms back and wrapped them protectively around her middle. _'He'd beat her there. She's afraid of me because of Him...because she thinks I'll hurt her the same way._' That thought made him sicker. She'd finally, very hesitantly, place her hand out to meet his. He watched her whole arm positively shake. He tried to be as gentle as he could, tried to convey that he wouldn't hurt her. He had no problem fighting someone who needed to be fought...but to hurt an innocent little girl? To have the teen version terrified of him? He didn't want to stomach it.

Conjuring up some gauze, James began to very lightly bandage her hands. He didn't want to touch too hard in fear of scaring her more than she was now or breaking her. Soon, her hands were covered in soft white bandages and the instant he let go, she sucked her hands to wrap protectively around her and watched his wrists like a hawk. She began to panic more as silence surrounded them. She was quiet out of terror of saying the wrong thing, he out of shock. What did one say to someone who'd been in this situation? Did they back up? Did they get close? Did they offer condolences? Or should they just wait for her to say something. After many long and tense moments, James finally broke the silence.

"Wh-...what...why didn't you say anything?" he asked finally. "Please look at me." after a short while, her eyes flickered up to his, and then down again. "Please, look." and she slowly brought her gaze to his and he watched as she quit breathing. The muscles in her neck stood out. "Why didn't you tell anyone?"

He looked at her and he could see the gears turning in her head. She was looking for hte answer that would bring her the least pain. "Just be honest, that's all I ask," he said softly. She went mute for a bit again, and slowly began to speak.

"I-I...d-d-did'n't w-wa-want t-to b-b-be-"she stopped, her breath going quickly. She forced herself to speak slowly, and the stutter sort of went away. The letters she would fumble on became one long sound. "I..didn't...want to be...h-hum-humiliated anymore..." after, the words came in a rush. "I was scared of what you would think. I didn't want to lose you or Brittney or anyone else. I didn't want to get made fun of again. I was told I would get beaten if I did. They said no one would want to be my friend...I..." she stopped, looking anywhere but James's penetrating eyes. He was very large and very close. Her eyes dropped to his fists. He noticed and slowly brought them up.

"Where do you want my hands so they don't scare you so much?"

With great hesitation, she touched his wrists, crossing them. It would take time for him to unfurl them and give her longer to prepare. "What was the last reason?"

Her eyes darted around again, looking for another way to get out, but there was none. She was trapped. "I...didn't know it would be ok..." she shut her eyes and turned her face, waiting, preparing for the blows to come. Tears began to form as the seconds ticked by. Was he going to let her wait it out until she thought she was safe? Was he wondering what to do?

"Lily, look at me," James uttered quietly and waited for her to bring her face up to his. "What...what they did to you was horrible. You were alone and terrified and they were selfish enough to blame you for their problems." she looked down sharply at her lap where his lax hands lay. "They embarrassed you, didn't they?"

"They said I wa-was...a mistake," the grip on his hands tightened, and two drops of liquid shame fell onto his skin. "They said I was the c-cause of everything ba-bad..." two more drops fell.

"It was their fault," James leaned down and murmered into her hair. And he moved his arms so she was pulled flush against him, then wrapped them around her. He felt her tense quickly, but he hushed her gently. One arm draped around his neck, the other under his arm and around his back. "They beat you, and they humilated you, but you didn't deserve it. You're with people who love you now, and I will never, ever hurt you. I will keep you safe, no matter what. I promise."

Lily blinked, her eyelashes brushing against the side of his neck where her head lay. He smelled as he always did. The scent comforted her. His embrace was like a wall from the evil of the world. Nothing could get her as long as she was held by him...and this was one of maybe five times she'd been held by someone. It hit her like a ton of bricks. The utter relief that she was with someone she trusted sank in. The knowledge that she wasn't alone anymore overwhelmed her. The knowlege that James would protect her broke down the walls she'd built up during her entire existence. And then...

For the first time in her life...

She cried.


End file.
